The Bottom 100 Revisited
I enjoy watching bad movies, but even I have a limit. Some of these really are the worst movies I've ever seen. Others are simply movies I just hate. There are a lot of comedies and sequels that clearly didn't work for me.
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- DirectorVictor SalvaStarsJonathan BreckRay WiseNicki AycoxSet a few days after the original, a championship basketball team's bus is attacked by The Creeper, the winged, flesh-eating terror, on the last day of his 23-day feeding frenzy.This is simply memorable as the worst movie I've ever seen.
- DirectorBrian De PalmaStarsAl PacinoMichelle PfeifferSteven BauerIn 1980 Miami, a determined Cuban immigrant takes over a drug cartel and succumbs to greed.I don't know why, but I hated this movie so much. Over-the-top I can handle, but this was just idiotic.
- DirectorRonny YuStarsRobert EnglundKen KirzingerKelly RowlandFreddy Krueger and Jason Voorhees return to terrorize the teenagers of Elm Street. Only this time, they're out to get each other, too.Oh, I got it. I just thought it was stupid.
- DirectorJeff TremaineStarsJohnny KnoxvilleBam MargeraChris PontiusJohnny Knoxville and his band of maniacs perform a variety of stunts and gross-out gags on the big screen for the first time.I can think of one gag that made me laugh. The rest were tragically lame.
- DirectorCourtney SolomonStarsJustin WhalinJeremy IronsZoe McLellanProfion, a tyrant, attempts to overthrow a peaceful kingdom ruled by a tough empress.I remember when this came out, someone thought it might end up better than Lord Of The Rings. Hindsight, people.
- DirectorMichael MooreStarsMichael MooreGeorge W. BushBen AffleckMichael Moore's view on what happened to the United States after September 11 and how the Bush Administration allegedly used the tragic event to push forward its agenda for unjust wars in Afghanistan and Iraq.It's not the message I don't like or agree with. It's that I can't stand Michael Moore's principles.
- DirectorSteve RashStarsPauly ShoreCarla GuginoLane SmithHaving gotten a taste of college life, a drastically changed farm girl returns home for Thanksgiving break with her best friend, a flamboyant party animal who is clearly a fish out of water in a small farm town.Pauly Shore is easily the least talented actor to earn as many starring roles as he did.
- DirectorAte de JongStarsPhoebe CatesRik MayallMarsha MasonA young woman finds her already unstable life rocked by the presence of a rambunctious imaginary friend from childhood.If you've seen it, it'd be hard to argue that this isn't a terrible excuse for a movie.
- DirectorJohn R. Cherry IIIStarsJim VarneyEartha KittAustin NaglerErnest accidentally unleashes an ugly troll that plots to transform children into wooden dolls in the town of Briarville, Missouri.The Ernest movies have their moments, but not this one.
- DirectorUwe BollStarsChristian SlaterTara ReidStephen DorffA detective of the paranormal slowly unravels mysterious events with deadly results."The hairs on the back of my neck just stood up." Classic lines like this can only come for a movie of this caliber.
- DirectorJohn G. AvildsenStarsSylvester StalloneTalia ShireBurt YoungReluctantly retired from fighting, Rocky takes charge of Mickey's gym and agrees to train a young protégé who's hungry for success.This is not how the Rocky series should have ended. Thank God for Rocky Balboa.
- DirectorIvan ReitmanStarsArnold SchwarzeneggerDanny DeVitoEmma ThompsonAs part of a fertility research project, a male scientist agrees to carry a pregnancy in his own body.A pregnant Arnold Schwarzenegger isn't as appealing as it sounds.
- DirectorRaja GosnellStarsMatthew LillardFreddie Prinze Jr.Sarah Michelle GellarAfter an acrimonious break up, the Mystery Inc. gang are individually brought to an island resort to investigate strange goings on.This movie makes no sense. If I were a kid, even I'd be bored.
- DirectorKenny OrtegaStarsBette MidlerSarah Jessica ParkerKathy NajimyA teenage boy named Max and his little sister move to Salem, where he struggles to fit in before awakening a trio of diabolical witches that were executed in the 17th century.Musicals annoy me in the first place. Bette Midler just makes it more unbearable.
- DirectorRobert HarmonStarsLaura ReganMarc BlucasEthan EmbryA psychology student finds all her childhood fears and phobias becoming real after a traumatic event.One of the many "night terror" movies that came out around the same time, and easily the worst.
- DirectorJohn FortenberryStarsChris KattanWill FerrellRaquel GardnerTwo dim-witted brothers dream of owning their own dance club or at least getting into the coolest and most exclusive club in town, The Roxbury.SNL sketches don't do so well as movies. It's amazing they could stretch this one into a movie at all. Still, the results are terrible.
- DirectorSam WeismanStarsBrendan FraserLeslie MannThomas Haden ChurchA man raised in the jungle by apes falls in love with a wealthy American heiress.I hope kids have a better appreciation for this tripe. I just don't get it.
- DirectorPatricia BirchStarsMichelle PfeifferMaxwell CaulfieldLorna LuftA British student at a 1960s American high school must prove himself to the leader of a girls' gang whose members can only date greasers.Grease the first isn't on any of my favorites lists. But even I can say it was far better than the driveling sequel.
- DirectorBurt KennedyStarsHulk HoganChristopher LloydShelley DuvallAn interstellar hero from a distant world visits Earth, and tries to fit in with a mundane, yet kind, suburban family.Hulk Hogan isn't a very good actor, but that's just one of this movie's problems.
- DirectorJoe AlvesStarsDennis QuaidBess ArmstrongSimon MacCorkindaleA giant thirty-five-foot shark becomes trapped in a SeaWorld theme park and it's up to the sons of police chief Brody to rescue everyone.I saw it in 2D, which was lame. But I doubt 3D will make it any less unbearable.
- DirectorHoward ZieffStarsDan AykroydJamie Lee CurtisAnna ChlumskyVada Sultenfuss must go to LA to stay with her Uncle Phil to do some research on her mother's life, but finds much more.Something was very off about this movie. I guess it's just downright boring.
- DirectorJerry ReesStarsJon LovitzTimothy StackTimothy E. DayA group of dated appliances embark on a journey to the city to find their master after being abandoned in a cabin in the woods.A toaster and a blankey? Yeah, those are the real heroes.
- DirectorGilbert AdlerStarsDennis MillerErika EleniakAngie EverhartThe Crypt Keeper returns to tell the story of a funeral parlor that moonlights as a vampire bordello.Tales From The Crypt are supposed to be comedic. But this is just laughably bad.
- DirectorAmy HeckerlingStarsJohn TravoltaKirstie AlleyOlympia DukakisThis time, a new baby is on the way, and it's a girl. Wrapped together with the standard conflict between mother and father, Mikey engages in a bit of sibling rivalry with his new sister.If not for the talking toilet, this could've been the worst movie I've ever seen.
- DirectorJeff KanewStarsShelley LongCraig T. NelsonBetty ThomasA soon to be divorced Beverly Hills socialite is determined to prove to her husband and herself that she can finish what she starts out to do, by becoming a den mother to a troop of Beverly Hills Girl Scouts.Take something decent and fuse it with something shallow, and you get this.
- DirectorNick CastleStarsWalter MatthauMason GambleJoan PlowrightWhen his parents must go out of town on business, Dennis stays with Mr. and Mrs. Wilson. He is driving Mr. Wilson crazy, but he is just trying to be helpful, even to the thief who has arrived in town.This was beneath Walter Matthau.
- DirectorHart BochnerStarsJon LovitzTia CarrereLouise FletcherRichard Clark has just left the well-known Wellington Academy to teach at Marion Barry High School. Now, he will try to inspire the D-average students into making good grades and try to woo a fellow teacher.When I was a kid, I thought it was a decent parody. But remember: that's coming from an adolescent with no sense of real comedy.
- DirectorSteve MinerStarsGérard DepardieuKatherine HeiglDalton JamesA teenage girl on vacation in the Bahamas with her divorced father tries to impress a potential boyfriend by saying that her father is actually her lover.I don't like Katherine Heigl now, and I sure didn't like her in this trainwreck.
- DirectorJim DrakeStarsSteve GuttenbergBubba SmithMichael WinslowThe misfit Police Academy (1984) graduates now are assigned to train a group of civilian volunteers to fight crime once again plaguing the streets.These movies got progressively worse, but this one seems the absolute worst.
- DirectorRick MoranisDave ThomasStarsRick MoranisDave ThomasMax von SydowCanada's most famous hosers, Bob and Doug McKenzie, get jobs at the Elsinore Brewery, only to learn that something is rotten with the state of it.I guess I just don't understand subtle Canadian comedy.
- DirectorMichael GottliebStarsThomas Ian NicholasJoss AcklandArt MalikA Little League player is sent back into medieval times where he is given the task of saving Camelot.How can a modern day kid do anything of value in Medieval times?
- DirectorKenneth BranaghStarsRobert De NiroKenneth BranaghHelena Bonham CarterWhen the brilliant but unorthodox scientist Dr. Victor Frankenstein rejects the artificial man that he has created, the Creature escapes and later swears revenge.They tried to stay true to the novel. Suffice it to say, they failed miserably.
- DirectorMichael SteinbergStarsLouise MyrbackJulia StilesChelsea FieldEllie is an average girl with typical teen problems: a bratty little sister, a nagging mom and a father that denies her the attention she desperately craves. But Ellie's not the kind of girl that gets mad. She gets evil.Watching this, I thought it was a joke. I guess the joke was on me.
- DirectorJonathan PrinceStarsJonathan JacksonChristopher LloydJohn PutchA group of junior high kids don't want to go to summer camps chosen by their parents. They make their own adult-free camp and "hire" an ex drama teacher to help.Christopher Lloyd didn't make the best career choices.
- DirectorHideo NakataStarsNaomi WattsDavid DorfmanSissy Spacek6 months after the incidents involving the lethal videotape, new clues prove that there is a new evil lurking in the darkness.The first movie was good enough. The second one just never works.
- DirectorJohn HughesStarsJim BelushiKelly LynchAlisan PorterA homeless man and his young companion, who survive by conning people, meet a woman who may need them even more than they need her.I don't particularly like movies about kids. Especially annoying kids. And Jim Belushi.
- DirectorRobert WiseStarsWilliam ShatnerLeonard NimoyDeForest KelleyWhen an alien spacecraft of enormous power is spotted approaching Earth, Admiral James T. Kirk resumes command of the overhauled USS Enterprise in order to intercept it.This may top my list of "most boring movies ever made."
- DirectorRupert WainwrightStarsBrian BonsallKaren DuffyJames RebhornAfter a bike accident, a young boy inadvertently gains possession of a check for $1 million and proceeds to spend it, unaware that the gangsters it belongs to are in pursuit.Preposterous shouldn't matter when it comes to a kid's movie. Well, here it does.
- DirectorChris ColumbusStarsMacaulay CulkinJoe PesciDaniel SternOne year after Kevin McCallister was left home alone and had to defeat a pair of bumbling burglars, he accidentally finds himself stranded in New York City - and the same criminals are not far behind.Home Alone wasn't very good. Doing the exact same thing in a different place doesn't improve it.
- DirectorAmy HeckerlingStarsChevy ChaseBeverly D'AngeloDana HillThe Griswolds win a vacation tour across Europe where the usual havoc ensues.Unlike the other Vacation movies, this one isn't funny.
- DirectorSean PennStarsEmile HirschVince VaughnCatherine KeenerAfter graduating from Emory University, top student and athlete Christopher McCandless abandons his possessions, gives his entire $24,000 savings account to charity and hitchhikes to Alaska to live in the wilderness. Along the way, Christopher encounters a series of characters that shape his life.This is actually a well-done film. But I have never wanted a real-life character to die more than this guy.
- DirectorEmile ArdolinoStarsTom SelleckSteve GuttenbergTed DansonThree ex-dads quickly discover how empty life is without their little lady, and go to outrageous lengths in their efforts to win their daughter back in this critically acclaimed and equally charming sequel.Did Tom Sellick know he was making these movies?
- DirectorPeter SegalStarsEddie MurphyJanet JacksonLarry MillerScientist Sherman Klump's inventions, his upcoming marriage to his pretty colleague Denise Gaines, and his reputation, are threatened by his evil clone Buddy Love.I'm still trying to understand why this movie was made in the first place.
- DirectorToby SheltonTad StonesAlan ZasloveStarsJonathan FreemanScott WeingerDan CastellanetaJafar comes for revenge on Aladdin, using a foolish thief and Iago's treachery to find a way back into power.There's a reason terrible Disney sequels are released directly to video.
- DirectorPeter HewittStarsKeanu ReevesAlex WinterWilliam SadlerA tyrant from the future creates evil android doubles of Bill and Ted and sends them back to eliminate the originals.At least the first movie was clever.
- DirectorBill KroyerStarsSamantha MathisChristian SlaterRobin WilliamsThe magical inhabitants of a rainforest fight to save their home, which is threatened by logging and a polluting force of destruction called Hexxus.People claim Avatar is basically the same story. It might be, but at least it isn't pointless.
- DirectorBrian LevantStarsJohn RitterMichael OliverJack WardenThe worst child in the world makes an unthinkable discovery: there is another child even worse than he is--and it's a girl.Again, with the movies about kids doing stupid things.
- DirectorBill DukeStarsWhoopi GoldbergKathy NajimyMaggie SmithShowgirl Deloris Van Cartier returns as Sister Mary Clarence to teach music to a group of Catholic students whose run-down school is slated for closure.This story barely has enough material for one movie, let alone a derivative sequel.
- DirectorRod DanielStarsCharles GrodinBonnie HuntNicholle TomBeethoven, the St. Bernard dog, becomes a father, but his girlfriend Missy is dognapped, and his puppies are in danger of the same fate.Formulaic, unfunny and ultimately unwatchable.
- DirectorDaniel Petrie Jr.StarsPauly ShoreLori PettyAndy DickTwo misguided youths join the reserves to make some money for their entrepreneurial dreams. No sooner than they finish basic training are they called up to do their part to save the free world.Why did Brandon Lee die so tragically, and yet Pauly Shore made junk like this unharmed?
- DirectorAndy TennantStarsKirstie AlleySteve GuttenbergMary-Kate OlsenAlyssa and Amanda are two little girls who are identical, but complete strangers, that accidentally meet one day.It's The Parent Trap with real twins. But also very stupid.
- DirectorLewis GilbertStarsRoger MooreLois ChilesMichael LonsdaleJames Bond investigates the mid-air theft of a space shuttle, and discovers a plot to commit global genocide.James Bond in space? And even worse is Jaws turning into Cassanova.
- DirectorFred SchepisiStarsTim RobbinsMeg RyanWalter MatthauA mechanic romances the mathematician niece of physicist Albert Einstein, with help from him and his friends.This movie could have worked, with Robbins and Matthau. But it didn't.
- DirectorDavid R. EllisStarsMichael J. FoxSally FieldRalph WaiteWhen adventurous pets Chance, Shadow, and Sassy are accidentally separated from their vacationing humans, they're left to fend for themselves on the mean streets of San Francisco, searching for the "golden bridge" that will take them home.What kind of people keep losing their pets?
- DirectorJon TurteltaubStarsVictor WongMichael TreanorMax Elliott SladeEach year, three brothers visit their grandfather for the summer. He is highly skilled in ninjutsu, and for years he has trained the boys in his techniques.In reality, these "ninjas" would've been killed a long time ago.
- DirectorRob ReinerStarsElijah WoodBruce WillisJason AlexanderSick of the neglect he receives from his mom and dad, a young boy leaves home and travels the world in search of new parents.Elijah Wood sets out on an emotional journey. It's just incredibly lame.
- DirectorWilliam MaloneStarsStephen DorffNatascha McElhoneStephen ReaA New York City detective investigates mysterious deaths occurring 48 hours after users log onto a site named feardotcom.This could've worked, especially with a guy like Stephen Dorff. But this was just terrible.
- DirectorRachel TalalayStarsLori PettyIce-TNaomi WattsA girl is among the few survivors of a dystopian Earth. Riding a war tank, she fights against the tyranny of a mega-corporation that dominates the remaining potable water supply of the planet.Not every cult following deserves to be made into a movie. Tank Girl is proof.
- DirectorJan de BontStarsSandra BullockJason PatricWillem DafoeA computer hacker breaks into the computer system of the Seabourn Legend cruise liner and sets it speeding on a collision course into a gigantic oil tanker.Two words why this movie is such a failure: Keanu Reeves. He ain't there.
- DirectorWych KaosayanandaStarsAntonio BanderasLucy LiuTalisa SotoTasked with destroying each other, an FBI agent and a rogue DIA agent soon discover that a much bigger enemy is at work.So much wasted potential.
- DirectorGore VerbinskiStarsNathan LaneLee EvansVicki LewisTwo stumblebum inheritors are determined to rid their antique house of a mouse who is equally determined to stay where he is.Maybe I don't remember this movie very well. All I do remember is it wasn't very funny.
- DirectorRandal KleiserStarsRick MoranisMarcia StrassmanRobert OliveriThe Szalinski family is back, this time hilarious disaster strikes when an experiment causes their new toddler son to grow many stories tall.Honey, I need an hour and half without having to deal with kids.
- DirectorSteve RashStarsWhoopi GoldbergFrank LangellaDennis FarinaCoincidences lead to the New York Knicks, getting its loudest fan, Edwina "Eddie" Franklin, as coach. Season victory?Why would any professional team in the world give a fan a coaching job?
- DirectorLawrence KasdanStarsMorgan FreemanThomas JaneJason LeeFriends on a camping trip discover that the town they're vacationing in is being plagued in an unusual fashion by parasitic aliens from outer space.I was so excited for this movie. So much wasted hope.
- DirectorBrad SilberlingStarsBill PullmanChristina RicciCathy MoriartyAn afterlife therapist and his daughter meet a friendly young ghost when they move into a crumbling mansion in order to rid the premises of wicked spirits.Word to the wise: don't turn a children's cartoon into a live action movie and expect it to be good.
- DirectorMark Steven JohnsonStarsNicolas CageEva MendesSam ElliottWhen motorcycle rider Johnny Blaze sells his soul to the Devil to save his father's life, he is transformed into the Ghost Rider, the Devil's own bounty hunter, and is sent to hunt down sinners.The comic is awesome. Nicolas Cage is about as wrong a choice as you could possibly find.
- DirectorChris KentisStarsBlanchard RyanDaniel TravisSaul SteinBased on the true story of two scuba divers accidentally stranded in shark infested waters after their tour boat has left.Just eat them already! This movie could've been 20 minutes long. Scratch that...should've been.
- DirectorMark Steven JohnsonStarsIan Michael SmithJoseph MazzelloAshley JuddA young boy with stunted growth is convinced that God has a great purpose for him.I hated the book, so maybe that's why I hated the movie.
- DirectorS.S. WilsonStarsFred WardChris GartinHelen ShaverEarl Bassett, now a washed-up ex-celebrity, is hired by a Mexican oil company to eradicate a Graboid epidemic that's killing more people each day. However, the humans aren't the only one with a new battle plan.The first Tremors is great comedic horror. This one, not so much.
- DirectorEric BressJ. Mackye GruberStarsAshton KutcherAmy SmartMelora WaltersEvan Treborn suffers blackouts during significant events of his life. As he grows up, he finds a way to remember these lost memories and a supernatural way to alter his life by reading his journal.Ashton Kutcher just doesn't have the talent to carry a ridiculous movie like this.
- DirectorTim StoryStarsIoan GruffuddJessica AlbaChris EvansThe Fantastic Four learn that they aren't the only super-powered beings in the universe when they square off against the powerful Silver Surfer and the planet-eating Galactus.I don't know if it's money or what, but they cut a very huge corner on this one by making Galactus just a big cloud.
- DirectorRoland EmmerichStarsJohn CusackThandiwe NewtonChiwetel EjioforA frustrated writer struggles to keep his family alive when a series of global catastrophes threatens to annihilate mankind.Roland Emmerich is a worse director than Michael Bay. There, I said it.
- DirectorGuy HamiltonStarsRoger MooreYaphet KottoJane SeymourJames Bond is sent to stop a diabolically brilliant heroin magnate armed with a complex organisation and a reliable psychic tarot card reader.Nothing about this movie feels like James Bond. Not even the racist sheriff, one of the most unnecessary characters in film history.
- DirectorJames FoleyStarsMark WahlbergReese WitherspoonWilliam PetersenWhen Nicole met David; handsome, charming, affectionate, he was everything. It seemed perfect, but soon she sees that David has a darker side. And his adoration turns to obsession, their dream into a nightmare, and her love into fear.This movie looks like it was made for $100 dollars. The acting supports that supposition.
- DirectorMel SmithStarsRowan AtkinsonPeter MacNicolJohn MillsThe bumbling Mr. Bean travels to America when he is given the responsibility of bringing a highly valuable painting to a Los Angeles museum.I don't know why I saw this movie. It'll probably go on my list of regrets when I die.
- DirectorJohn R. LeonettiStarsRobin ShouTalisa SotoJames RemarA group of martial-arts warriors has only six days to save the Earth from an extra-dimensional invasion.Johnny Cage would not die that easily. Also, the rest of the movie is plain idiotic.
- DirectorJohn BadhamStarsAlly SheedySteve GuttenbergFisher StevensNumber 5 of a group of experimental robots in a lab is electrocuted, suddenly becomes intelligent, and escapes.I thought the sequel was somewhat humorous. This one is unfortunate.
- DirectorJoseph RubenStarsJulianne MooreDominic WestChristopher KovaleskiAfter being told that their children never existed, a man and woman soon discover there is a much bigger enemy at work.The premise was intriguing. The execution (and twist, I guess) was tragic.
- DirectorJoel SchumacherStarsArnold SchwarzeneggerGeorge ClooneyChris O'DonnellBatman and Robin try to keep their relationship together even as they must stop Mr. Freeze and Poison Ivy from freezing Gotham City.If not for Batman Begins, this could've been the last Batman movie. God bless you, Christopher Nolan!
- DirectorSteven BrillStarsAdam SandlerPatricia ArquetteHarvey KeitelAfter two of the devil's three sons escape Hell to wreak havoc on Earth, the devil must send his third son, the mild-mannered Nicky, to bring them back before it's too late.I enjoy Adam Sandler movies, knowing full well they are mindless entertainment. This just happens to be the most mindless.
- DirectorSteven BrillStarsMatthew LillardSeth GreenDax ShepardAfter their friend dies, three men decide to fulfill their childhood dream by going on a camping expedition for the lost D. B. Cooper bounty, with calamitous results.I have yet to see a movie with Dax Sheppard that can be described as "good."
- DirectorAkiva SchafferStarsAndy SambergIsla FisherIan McShaneSelf-proclaimed stuntman Rod Kimble is preparing for the jump of his life - to clear fifteen buses to raise money for his abusive stepfather Frank's life-saving heart operation.There is nothing inspired about this movie, and it makes for some very weak and familiar comedy.
- DirectorJohn McTiernanStarsChris KleinJean RenoLL Cool JThe big thing in 2005 is a violent sport which can have some pretty serious consequences... like dying.The original didn't need to be remade. It was bad enough. But, as a surprise to no one, this is worse.
- DirectorHoward ZieffStarsAnna ChlumskyMacaulay CulkinDan AykroydVada is obsessed with death. Her mother is dead, and her father runs a funeral parlor. When Vada's father hires Shelly, a makeup expert, and begins to fall in love, Vada is outraged and does everything in her power to split them up.I enjoyed this as a kid, but now I don't know why.
- DirectorJeff SchafferAlec BergDavid MandelStarsScott MechlowiczJacob PittsMichelle TrachtenbergDumped by his girlfriend, a high school grad decides to embark on an overseas adventure in Europe with his friends.This movie is really stupid, even without the incest.
- DirectorPeter HyamsStarsJohn RitterPam DawberJeffrey JonesA husband and wife are sucked into a hellish television set and must survive the gauntlet of twisted versions of shows in which they find themselves.There are times when I think about this movie and wonder if it actually existed, or if I made it up.
- DirectorGregory PoirierStarsShannon ElizabethJerry O'ConnellJake BuseyAt the wedding of a friend, the remaining bachelors bet on staying single. Seven years later, one of the two remaining loses $51,000 in Vegas. He must get the other guy married to cash in and pay his debt or die. A cute woman helps him.Just another raunchy comedy that isn't worth your time.
- DirectorMarcus RaboyStarsIce CubeMike EppsJohn WitherspoonWorking as security guards, Craig and Day-Day run into the thief who stole their Christmas presents.Friday was great. Next Friday was dumb, but still funny. This one was dumb and unfunny.
- DirectorRob ZombieStarsSid HaigKaren BlackBill MoseleyTwo young couples traveling across the backwoods of Texas searching for urban legends of murder end up as prisoners of a bizarre and sadistic backwater family of serial killers.This movie shows promise at times. But in the end, it's a B-horror movie.
- DirectorPeter BonerzStarsBubba SmithDavid GrafMichael WinslowThose bumbling cadets take to the streets when three inept goons successfully orchestrate a metropolitan crime wave.To be honest, I don't think I remember anything about this movie. That can't be good.
- DirectorBob LoganStarsLeslie NielsenLinda BlairNed BeattyParody of The Exorcist (1973), with Linda Blair once again possessed by Satan, and Leslie Nielsen as the exorcist.A parody of The Exorcist is a good idea. The execution, however, isn't so good.
- DirectorFred DekkerStarsRobert John BurkeNancy AllenMario MachadoRobocop saves the day once more. This time the half man/half robot takes on ruthless developers who want to evict some people on "their" land.This is what happens when Peter Weller isn't Robocop. Not that Robocop 2 was that much better.
- DirectorDavid S. WardStarsKelsey GrammerLauren HollyRob SchneiderLt. Cmdr. Tom Dodge is assigned as Captain to the USS Stingray, an old diesel driven submarine that has seen better days.McHale's Navy, this is not.
- DirectorJonathan LiebesmanStarsChaney KleyEmma Caulfield FordAntony BurrowsA vengeful spirit has taken the form of the Tooth Fairy to exact vengeance on the town that lynched her 150 years earlier. Her only opposition is the only child, now grown up, who has survived her before.Yet another movie about some sissy kid being afraid of the dark because some ghost will kill him.
- DirectorLee TamahoriStarsPierce BrosnanHalle BerryRosamund PikeJames Bond is sent to investigate the connection between a North Korean terrorist and a diamond mogul, who is funding the development of an international space weapon.Lee Tamahori is a terrible director. James Bond deserves so much better.
- DirectorJohn HughesStarsAnthony Michael HallIlan Mitchell-SmithKelly LeBrockTwo high-school nerds use a computer program to literally create the perfect woman, who promptly turns their lives upside-down.It's meaningless to call the story preposterous. But it is. This is nothing more than a teenage wet dream.
- DirectorLasse HallströmStarsTobey MaguireCharlize TheronMichael CaineA compassionate young man, raised in an orphanage and trained to be a doctor there, decides to leave to see the world.Again, I hated the book. I'll just say it: John Irving is one author I truly despise.
- DirectorDavid ZuckerStarsAnna FarisCharlie SheenRegina HallCindy must investigate mysterious crop circles and video tapes, and help the President in preventing an alien invasion.This is the only Scary Movie I saw, and it wasn't inspiring.
- DirectorChris ColumbusStarsDaniel RadcliffeRupert GrintEmma WatsonHarry Potter lives his second year at Hogwarts with Ron and Hermione when a message on the wall announces that the legendary Chamber of Secrets has been opened. The trio soon realize that, to save the school, it will take a lot of courage.If not for a demonically possessed car, Harry Potter would've died here and spared us another six or seven movies.
- DirectorJoe ChappelleStarsPeter O'TooleRose McGowanJoanna GoingIn the peaceful town of Snowfield, Colorado something evil has wiped out the community. And now, its up to a group of people to stop it, or at least get out of Snowfield alive.Despite a powerful endorsement from Jay and Silent Bob, Ben Affleck is not the bomb in Phantoms, yo.