The Shape's Reign of Terror: Ranking the Halloween Films
Of all the slahser films ever made--most of them trashy exploitation films--the finest is without question John Carpenter's Halloween. Genuinely terrifying and thick with an atmosphere of autumnal dread, Halloween introduced and codified many of the formulas that have molded horror films good and bad for three decades now. But fans of the 1979 classic wanted more from Halloween's iconic boogeyman, Michael Myers, and so a sequel was inevitable...and then another, and another. As with the similar Friday the 13th series, quality has been a variable commodity in these films, but the best of them are some of the scariest movies in the industry. Here then is my list of the entire franchise to this point, rated from best to worst. As if there's any question as to the best...
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- DirectorJohn CarpenterStarsDonald PleasenceJamie Lee CurtisTony MoranFifteen years after murdering his sister on Halloween night 1963, Michael Myers escapes from a mental hospital and returns to the small town of Haddonfield, Illinois to kill again.John Carpenter's magnum opus, and the best slasher movie ever produced. Not only did Halloween put Carpenter on the map, but it launched the career of Jamie Lee Curtis, who for many years was the dominant Scream Queen in the genre. What makes Halloween so good? For one thing, it's truly frightening. Many slasher films don't even pretend to take themselves seriously and implode into self-parody. But there's nothing campy about Halloween--indeed, it's as serious as a heart attack. The film eschews cheap gore and buckets of blood for carefully constructed scares, and upon rewatching the film after a too-long interval I was amazed by how little blood there actually is. Carpenter's direction creates a brooding atmosphere of doom that permeates every aspect of the film, and the film's monster--for no other word describes Michael Myers adequately--is scary on a level no other contemporary horror villain even approaches. Myers's ambiguous nature is part of the reason he's so terrifying. Is he merely a sociopath, or the Shape of evil incarnate? Even Dr. Loomis, Myers's psychiatrist, can't say for sure. Loomis, expertly played by veteran actor Donald Pleasence, is the Van Helsing of the Halloween franchise, the one man who knows how dangerous Myers is and is obsessed with stopping his reign of terror. But can he save Jamie Lee Curtis in time? Every time I watch the film, I find myself caught up in that question anew. And every time, Halloween scares me in a way like no other film of its kind.
- DirectorRob ZombieStarsScout Taylor-ComptonMalcolm McDowellTyler ManeAfter being committed for 15 years, Michael Myers, now a grown man and still very dangerous, escapes from the mental institution and immediately returns to Haddonfield to find his baby sister, Laurie.Pales next to the original in so many ways, and suffers from director Rob Zombie's needless penchant for gratuitous cursing, nudity, gore, etc., but despite its weaknesses this remake of the original classic nonetheless succeeds in re-imagining a great story and making it work, at least for the most part, on its own terms. The cast is exceptional, and the direction and screenplay combine to create a film saturated with blood and terror. Zombie's incarnation of Michael Myers is a ruthless killing machine unlike any other, and Scout-Taylor Compton does a fine job of stepping into Jamie Lee Curtis's iconic shoes, while Malcolm McDowell adds several new dimensions to the vital role of Dr. Loomis. Maybe not the classic of its inspiration, and certainly flawed, but all the same a horrifying journey into the realm of madness and death. The drawn-out finale as Myers stalks Laurie is a masterstroke of breathless suspense.
- DirectorRick RosenthalStarsJamie Lee CurtisDonald PleasenceCharles CyphersWhile Dr. Loomis hunts for Michael Myers, a traumatized Laurie is rushed to Haddonfield Memorial Hospital, and The Shape is not far behind her.If only this one had been paced better--the slow-moving plot is a little too methodical and the suspense slowly drains away at times--Halloween II might have been as good as its predecessor. Failing that, it's still a very good slasher film with an outstanding--and explosive--climax.
- DirectorSteve MinerStarsJamie Lee CurtisJosh HartnettAdam ArkinLaurie Strode, now the dean of a Northern California private school with an assumed name, must battle the Shape one last time, as the life of her own son hangs in the balance.20 years after Michael Myers came out of the shadows and tried to murder her, Laurie Strode has put the nightmare behind her. She has a son who is everything to her, and a man who loves her. But she also has Michael Myers, and he's not going to let her go. Is this the final battle between Michael and Laurie? Jamie Lee Curtis returns to the role that made her famous and nails it. The film is a bit too hip for its own good, perhaps influenced by the Scream films, but still a fine, scary story. If only Donald Pleasence had still been alive for this one, it could have really been something special.
- DirectorDwight H. LittleStarsDonald PleasenceEllie CornellDanielle HarrisTen years after his original massacre, the invalid Michael Myers awakens on Halloween Eve and returns to Haddonfield to kill his seven-year-old niece. Can Dr. Loomis stop him?Not as good as it should have been, but even so a worthy continuation of the Halloween series. Michael returns to stalk his young niece (Danielle Harris) and Dr. Loomis is once again crying wolf. Will anyone believe him before the killing starts again? Ellie Cornell stars as a great heroine on a par with Jamie Lee and the finale is a stunner.
- DirectorRob ZombieStarsScout Taylor-ComptonTyler ManeMalcolm McDowellLaurie Strode struggles to come to terms with her brother Michael's deadly return to Haddonfield, Illinois; meanwhile, Michael prepares for another reunion with his sister.Several of the films in the series have dealt with the possibility that others in Michael's bloodline could be tainted by the same evil that infests him, but Zombie's follow-up to his bold and bloody re-imagining of the original probably does a better job of addressing this possibility than any of the others. Michael is portrayed a bit differently in this film, but he's still evil incarnate. Has many of the same strengths and weaknesses of Zombie's previous Halloween installment, but the biggest problem is the treatment of Dr. Loomis. He's essentially a villain this time around--or at least a serious jerk--and it just isn't right. But as an exploration of the dark depths of madness, it is quite a triumph.
- DirectorDominique Othenin-GirardStarsDonald PleasenceDanielle HarrisEllie CornellOne year after the events of Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988), the Shape returns to Haddonfield once again in an attempt to kill his now-mute niece.Picking up right where Halloween 4 leaves off, The Revenge of Michael Myers doesn't quite develop all the ideas introduced in the previous film and the ending is way out of left field. A better screenplay would have elevated this one to a higher level, but the direction is fine and the cast is appealing. Dr. Loomis's obsession with stopping Michael once and for all is finally driving him over the edge, and Danielle Harris once again does a great job as young Jamie. A must-see for Halloween fans--as long as they realize they won't be entirely satisfied by the final product.
- DirectorDavid Gordon GreenStarsJamie Lee CurtisJudy GreerAndi MatichakLaurie Strode confronts her long-time foe, Michael Myers, the masked figure who has haunted her since she narrowly escaped his killing spree on Halloween night four decades ago.Like H20, this sequel ignores everything except the original film. Also like H20, this is the story of a traumatized Laurie Strode dealing with the dark happenings of her past and still very much haunted by the specter of Michael Myers. I think it's safe to say this is basically a re-imagining of H20, in fact, though this film differs from that one in many respects. This time around Laurie is a fanatic survivalist who has spent forty years preparing for Michael's inevitable return. Once again the two horror icons battle it out. Michael is especially ruthless in this one and production values are terrific, but the characters are poorly developed and there's too much distracting humor. A very good Halloween film, but not one of the best.
- DirectorJoe ChappelleStarsDonald PleasencePaul RuddMarianne HaganSix years after Michael Myers last terrorized Haddonfield, he returns there in pursuit of his niece, Jamie Lloyd, who has escaped with her newborn child, for which Michael and a mysterious cult have sinister plans.Too many plot nearly holes sink this entry in the Halloween franchise. There's certainly a number of good ideas floating around in the underwritten script, but they should have been developed a little better. Some good kills performed by an especially formidable Michael. But what exactly happens in the end? A director's cut exists which explains things a little better than the original version, but in exchange it cuts out some of the best material and is far less exciting. Still not a bad movie and a must for all die-hard Halloween followers, but definitely a bit of a letdown considering the quality of the series as a whole.
- DirectorRick RosenthalStarsJamie Lee CurtisBusta RhymesBrad LoreeThree years after he last terrorized his sister, Michael Myers confronts her again, before traveling to Haddonfield to deal with the cast and crew of a reality show which is being broadcast from his old home.Succumbs to the self-parody that for the most part the Halloween series always avoided, and the result is a major disappointment. At times the atmosphere and some creative murders make up for the frequently ridiculous plot, but any hope for a strong finish is squandered by a sorry non-climax that is an insult to everything the Halloween saga stands for. Good cast with some real star power is wasted by a poor script and inconsistent direction.
- DirectorTommy Lee WallaceStarsTom AtkinsStacey NelkinDan O'HerlihyKids all over America want Silver Shamrock masks for Halloween. Doctor Daniel Challis seeks to uncover a plot by Silver Shamrock owner Conal Cochran.A bad idea from start to finish, this is easily the worst film in the franchise. Michael Myers isn't even in this one, because somebody apparently thought it would be a good idea to forget about the Shape and go for something completely different. It is that, and also completely hopeless. The crazy plot revolves around vengeful druids and cursed Halloween masks, but it doesn't really matter because it's all so farcical. And as for the ending...well, there really isn't one. The picture just sort of stops...which is, I suppose, for the best. Apologists for this film claim that if fans can accept it as an independent project distinct from the saga of Michael Myers its actually pretty good...but no, it's not. Whether taken as an extension of the existing series or a standalone feature, this is just a very poor movie, period.