Movies From A Hat #2
by acharpentier2010 | created - 08 Sep 2012 | updated - 04 Nov 2012 | PublicMy wife & I choose 40 films (20 we've seen, 20 we haven't, 20 each), mix them up, and watch them in order. These are the 140-character reviews that result.
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1. Holy Flying Circus (2011 TV Movie)
Not Rated | 89 min | Comedy, Drama
Tells the story of the outraged, and sometimes violent, response to 'The Life of Brian' the Monty Python movie that satirized the life of Jesus.
Director: Owen Harris | Stars: Ben Crispin, Steve Punt, Charles Edwards, Rufus Jones
Votes: 1,636
Holy Flying Circus is frantic and imitative and only offers a faint echo of the real Monty Pythons. We didn't even finish this turkey.
2. 300 (2006)
R | 117 min | Action, Drama
In the ancient battle of Thermopylae, King Leonidas and 300 Spartans fight against Xerxes and his massive Persian army. They face insurmountable odds when they are betrayed by a Spartan reject.
Director: Zack Snyder | Stars: Gerard Butler, Lena Headey, David Wenham, Dominic West
Votes: 863,336 | Gross: $210.61M
We gave 300 a watch with Rifftrax and it quickly turned into a laugh riot. I would suggest alternating viewings with 'trax on and off.
3. To Sir, with Love (1967)
Approved | 105 min | Drama
Idealistic engineer-trainee and his experiences in teaching a group of rambunctious white high school students from the slums of London's East End.
Director: James Clavell | Stars: Sidney Poitier, Judy Geeson, Christian Roberts, Suzy Kendall
Votes: 20,385 | Gross: $42.43M
Featuring a heroic performance by Sidney Poitier, To Sir, With Love is good, but ends abruptly without much conflict in need of resolution.
4. Magnum Force (1973)
R | 124 min | Action, Crime, Mystery
Inspector "Dirty" Harry Callahan pursues a conspiracy of vigilante cops, who are not above going beyond the law to kill San Francisco's undesirables.
Director: Ted Post | Stars: Clint Eastwood, Hal Holbrook, Mitchell Ryan, David Soul
Votes: 66,556 | Gross: $4.56M
Magnum Force is the lackluster 1st sequel to Dirty Harry. Harry lacks real motivation but it's still fun, thanks to Eastwood, but not great.
5. Consenting Adults (1992)
R | 99 min | Crime, Drama, Mystery
During a joint dinner at the restaurant, the neighbors offer to exchange wives for one night. It was a joke, but only at first.
Director: Alan J. Pakula | Stars: Kevin Kline, Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio, Kevin Spacey, Rebecca Miller
Votes: 8,336 | Gross: $21.59M
A bargain bin title starring big name actors, Consenting Adults is surprisingly suspenseful, sexy, and full of flawed neo-noir characters.
6. I've Loved You So Long (2008)
PG-13 | 117 min | Drama
A woman struggles to interact with her family and find her place in society after spending fifteen years in prison.
Director: Philippe Claudel | Stars: Kristin Scott Thomas, Elsa Zylberstein, Serge Hazanavicius, Laurent Grévill
Votes: 20,707 | Gross: $3.17M
I've Loved You So Long is a horrible wound to self-inflict due to its uncompromising cruelty and corrosive negativity. We didn't finish it. Perfect for those nights when it's a toss-up between watching a movie or slitting your wrists.
7. A Very Harold & Kumar Christmas (2011)
R | 90 min | Adventure, Comedy
Six years after their Guantanamo Bay adventure, stoner buds Harold Lee and Kumar Patel cause a holiday fracas by inadvertently burning down Harold's father-in-law's prize Christmas tree.
Director: Todd Strauss-Schulson | Stars: Kal Penn, John Cho, Neil Patrick Harris, Patton Oswalt
Votes: 72,698 | Gross: $35.03M
A Very Harold & Kumar Christmas is a good follow-up, but there's nothing to differentiate it from the others in scope or style, so if you were looking for more of the same (we were) then you won't be disappointed.
8. Death at a Funeral (2007)
R | 90 min | Comedy
Chaos ensues when a man tries to expose a dark secret regarding a recently deceased patriarch of a dysfunctional British family.
Director: Frank Oz | Stars: Matthew Macfadyen, Peter Dinklage, Ewen Bremner, Keeley Hawes
Votes: 120,883 | Gross: $8.58M
Death At a Funeral (2007) is hilarious & didn't need a remake. If you're too thick to relate because the actors don't look like you, die.
9. Adaptation. (2002)
R | 115 min | Comedy, Drama
A lovelorn screenwriter becomes desperate as he tries and fails to adapt 'The Orchid Thief' by Susan Orlean for the screen.
Director: Spike Jonze | Stars: Nicolas Cage, Meryl Streep, Chris Cooper, Tilda Swinton
Votes: 202,884 | Gross: $22.25M
Adaptation. is a great film that satirizes the Hollywood template yet provides a pretty good example of it and Nick Cage is perfectly cast.
10. To Die For (1995)
R | 106 min | Comedy, Crime, Drama
A beautiful but naïve aspiring television personality films a documentary on teenagers with a darker ulterior motive.
Director: Gus Van Sant | Stars: Nicole Kidman, Matt Dillon, Joaquin Phoenix, Casey Affleck
Votes: 52,822 | Gross: $21.28M
For all its accolades, To Die For is kind of disappointing. Dull. Boring. Life is too short, I feel, to give it a thorough watch. Skip it!
11. The Evil Dead (1981)
NC-17 | 85 min | Horror
Five friends travel to a cabin in the woods, where they unknowingly release flesh-possessing demons.
Director: Sam Raimi | Stars: Bruce Campbell, Ellen Sandweiss, Richard DeManincor, Betsy Baker
Votes: 232,187 | Gross: $2.40M
[THIS COMMENT IS FOR EVIL DEAD: THE MUSICAL (2003)]
Evil Dead the Musical captures the spirit of the films, includes every beat, offers its own witty insights, and may even surpass them all.
12. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (2005)
R | 103 min | Comedy, Crime, Mystery
After being mistaken for an actor, a New York thief is sent to Hollywood to train under a private eye for a potential movie role, but the duo are thrown together with a struggling actress into a murder mystery.
Director: Shane Black | Stars: Robert Downey Jr., Val Kilmer, Michelle Monaghan, Corbin Bernsen
Votes: 237,241 | Gross: $4.24M
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang is gripping, funny, and packs a genius script and actors. We picked this up the very next time we saw it in the store.
13. Stay Tuned (1992)
PG | 88 min | Adventure, Comedy, Fantasy
A husband and wife are sucked into a hellish television set and must survive the gauntlet of twisted versions of shows in which they find themselves.
Director: Peter Hyams | Stars: John Ritter, Pam Dawber, Jeffrey Jones, David Tom
Votes: 14,203 | Gross: $10.74M
Stay Tuned is a perfect summation of the films I grew up with in the 90's. It isn't smart or hilarious, but it's entertaining.
14. WALL·E (2008)
G | 98 min | Animation, Adventure, Family
In the distant future, a small waste-collecting robot inadvertently embarks on a space journey that will ultimately decide the fate of mankind.
Director: Andrew Stanton | Stars: Ben Burtt, Elissa Knight, Jeff Garlin, Fred Willard
Votes: 1,198,845 | Gross: $223.81M
Wall-E is amusing but not as picturesque upon second viewing. There are several magnificent plot holes and a robot is saved by love.
15. Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004)
PG-13 | 94 min | Comedy
In the 1970s, an anchorman's stint as San Diego's top-rated newsreader is challenged when an ambitious newswoman becomes his co-anchor.
Director: Adam McKay | Stars: Will Ferrell, Christina Applegate, Steve Carell, Paul Rudd
Votes: 378,227 | Gross: $85.29M
Anchorman. I don't understand the fascination with this turd. The script is great, plenty of memorable lines, but on screen it's boring.
16. Being John Malkovich (1999)
R | 113 min | Comedy, Drama, Fantasy
A puppeteer discovers a portal that leads literally into the head of movie star John Malkovich.
Director: Spike Jonze | Stars: John Cusack, Cameron Diaz, Catherine Keener, John Malkovich
Votes: 353,134 | Gross: $22.86M
Being John Malkovich is a screwy, rewatchable portrait of magical realism, impotence & paranoid delusions. Great cast and eerie filming.
17. Flirting (1991)
R | 99 min | Drama, Romance
Two freethinking teenagers - a boy and a girl - confront with authoritarian teachers in their boarding schools. The other students treat this differently.
Director: John Duigan | Stars: Noah Taylor, Thandiwe Newton, Nicole Kidman, Bartholomew Rose
Votes: 6,401 | Gross: $2.42M
Flirting is a sweet film, provided you don't learn some uncomfortable truths about John Duigan and Thandie Newton's on-set relationship.
18. Great Expectations (1998)
R | 111 min | Drama, Romance
Modernization of Charles Dickens' classic story finds the hapless Finn as a painter in New York City pursuing his unrequited and haughty childhood love.
Director: Alfonso Cuarón | Stars: Ethan Hawke, Gwyneth Paltrow, Hank Azaria, Chris Cooper
Votes: 56,878 | Gross: $26.33M
Great Expectations is on the cusp of being an MTV movie, but avoids that set of cliches by sticking closer to those in the source material.
19. Patriot Games (1992)
R | 117 min | Action, Thriller
When CIA analyst Jack Ryan interferes with an IRA assassination, a renegade faction targets him and his family for revenge.
Director: Phillip Noyce | Stars: Harrison Ford, Sean Bean, Anne Archer, Patrick Bergin
Votes: 120,295 | Gross: $83.29M
I was surprised that we had to slog through Patriot Games, expecting a much more action-packed experience in the vein as Frantic. Not so.
20. A Beautiful Mind (2001)
PG-13 | 135 min | Biography, Drama, Mystery
A mathematical genius, John Nash made an astonishing discovery early in his career and stood on the brink of international acclaim. But the handsome and arrogant Nash soon found himself on a harrowing journey of self-discovery.
Director: Ron Howard | Stars: Russell Crowe, Ed Harris, Jennifer Connelly, Christopher Plummer
Votes: 985,826 | Gross: $170.74M
A Beautiful Mind has an exquisite script, brilliant direction, a talented cast, and a surprisingly watchable butthole for a protagonist.
21. Kindergarten Cop (1990)
PG-13 | 111 min | Action, Comedy, Crime
A tough cop must pose as a kindergarten teacher in order to locate a dangerous criminal's ex-wife, who may hold the key to putting him behind bars.
Director: Ivan Reitman | Stars: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Penelope Ann Miller, Pamela Reed, Linda Hunt
Votes: 162,446 | Gross: $91.46M
I intended to introduce my wife to Kindergarten Cop, but she had seen it. For now, I'd like to keep it as an untarnished fond memory...
22. Hardware (1990)
R | 94 min | Sci-Fi, Thriller
The head of a cyborg reactivates, rebuilds itself, and goes on a violent rampage in a space marine's girlfriend's apartment.
Director: Richard Stanley | Stars: Dylan McDermott, Stacey Travis, John Lynch, Carl McCoy
Votes: 16,433 | Gross: $5.73M
The visuals in Hardware are great and that's all. The story is bland, effort is never made, and there's a character named "Shades".
23. Delicatessen (1991)
R | 99 min | Comedy, Crime
Post-apocalyptic surrealist black comedy about the landlord of an apartment building who occasionally prepares a delicacy for his odd tenants.
Directors: Marc Caro, Jean-Pierre Jeunet | Stars: Marie-Laure Dougnac, Dominique Pinon, Pascal Benezech, Jean-Claude Dreyfus
Votes: 89,978 | Gross: $1.79M
Delicatessen is a masterpiece that avoids its grisly subject matter by creating an ensemble cast that are both cartoonish and sweetly real.
24. The Four Seasons (1981)
PG | 107 min | Comedy, Drama
Three couples vacation together every season. After one divorces, feelings of betrayal and more spawn criticisms of one another, but the things that keep them together are stronger than those which might pull them apart.
Director: Alan Alda | Stars: Alan Alda, Carol Burnett, Len Cariou, Sandy Dennis
Votes: 5,594 | Gross: $50.43M
The Four Seasons isn't complicated, none of the actors are overworked, but the effect is calming, relatable, and a worthwhile yearly watch.
25. Ink (I) (2009)
Not Rated | 107 min | Action, Drama, Fantasy
A mysterious creature, known as Ink, steals a child's soul in hopes of using it as a bargaining chip to join the Incubi - the group of supernatural beings responsible for creating nightmares.
Director: Jamin Winans | Stars: Christopher Soren Kelly, Quinn Hunchar, Jessica Duffy, Jennifer Batter
Votes: 22,376
After twenty minutes of perseverance, Ink didn't seem to be leading anywhere that wasn't precious or cliche. We gave up on it.
26. The Accidental Tourist (1988)
PG | 121 min | Comedy, Drama, Romance
An emotionally distant writer of travel guides must carry on with his life after his son is killed and his marriage crumbles.
Director: Lawrence Kasdan | Stars: William Hurt, Kathleen Turner, Geena Davis, Amy Wright
Votes: 17,259 | Gross: $32.63M
The Accidental Tourist was another disappointment. If there was any substance in it, it takes more than forty minutes to get there. Oh well.
27. My Giant (1998)
PG | 103 min | Comedy, Drama
Billy Crystal plays a Hollywood agent who stumbles upon Max, a giant living in Romania, and tries to get him into the movies.
Director: Michael Lehmann | Stars: Billy Crystal, Gheorghe Muresan, Kathleen Quinlan, Joanna Pacula
Votes: 7,178 | Gross: $7.99M
If you can laugh again and again and again and again at how tiny Billy Crystal is compared to Gheorghe Muresan, you'll enjoy My Giant.
28. Submarine (2010)
R | 97 min | Comedy, Drama, Romance
15-year-old Oliver Tate has two objectives: to lose his virginity before his next birthday, and to extinguish the flame between his mother and an ex-lover who has resurfaced in her life.
Director: Richard Ayoade | Stars: Craig Roberts, Sally Hawkins, Paddy Considine, Noah Taylor
Votes: 96,450 | Gross: $0.47M
We can't be blamed for thinking Submarine was akin to a Wes Anderson film (stupid lying trailer) but there's nothing redeemable here.
29. Happy Accidents (2000)
R | 110 min | Comedy, Romance
New Yorker Ruby Weaver believes she has found the man of her dreams in Sam Deed, who is her best catch in some time--except that he assures her that he came from the future.
Director: Brad Anderson | Stars: Marisa Tomei, Vincent D'Onofrio, Holland Taylor, Mick Weber
Votes: 10,222 | Gross: $0.69M
Right when I thought we'd never finish any of these horrible movies, we did, we really did finish a horrible movie called Happy Accidents.
30. Fatal Attraction (1987)
R | 119 min | Drama, Thriller
A married man's one-night stand comes back to haunt him when that lover begins to stalk him and his family.
Director: Adrian Lyne | Stars: Michael Douglas, Glenn Close, Anne Archer, Ellen Latzen
Votes: 96,960 | Gross: $156.65M
Fatal Attraction is a dirty, filthy little film with outstanding performances all around. Also, Glenn Close dresses like the Borg Queen.
31. Coraline (2009)
PG | 100 min | Animation, Drama, Family
Wandering her rambling old house in her boring new town, an 11-year-old Coraline discovers a hidden door to a strangely idealized version of her life. In order to stay in the fantasy, she must make a frighteningly real sacrifice.
Director: Henry Selick | Stars: Dakota Fanning, Teri Hatcher, John Hodgman, Jennifer Saunders
Votes: 263,354 | Gross: $75.29M
Coraline was better as a book. For some reason, they found the need to dumb down the storyline and throw in a distracting male character.
32. State and Main (2000)
R | 105 min | Comedy, Drama
A movie crew invades a small town whose residents are all too ready to give up their values for showbiz glitz.
Director: David Mamet | Stars: Philip Seymour Hoffman, William H. Macy, Rebecca Pidgeon, Michael Higgins
Votes: 22,160 | Gross: $6.92M
State and Main is funny, well-acted, tight, and so damn...filmy it's downright surreal, but not in a hoity-toity, David Lynch kind of way.
33. Lost Highway (1997)
R | 134 min | Drama, Mystery, Thriller
Anonymous videotapes presage a musician's murder conviction, and a gangster's girlfriend leads a mechanic astray.
Director: David Lynch | Stars: Bill Pullman, Patricia Arquette, John Roselius, Louis Eppolito
Votes: 153,015 | Gross: $3.80M
Lost Highway embodies the lot of David Lynch's filmography. If you like incoherent messes, you'll love this crap pile. We didn't finish it.
34. Philadelphia (1993)
PG-13 | 125 min | Drama
When a man with HIV is fired by his law firm because of his condition, he hires a homophobic small time lawyer as the only willing advocate for a wrongful dismissal suit.
Director: Jonathan Demme | Stars: Tom Hanks, Denzel Washington, Roberta Maxwell, Buzz Kilman
Votes: 257,827 | Gross: $77.32M
Philadelphia is The Accused with AIDs or A Time To Kill with a prejudice lawyer. If either of those references fire, you've already seen it.
35. Election (1999)
R | 103 min | Comedy, Romance
A high school teacher meets his match in an over-achieving student politician.
Director: Alexander Payne | Stars: Matthew Broderick, Reese Witherspoon, Loren Nelson, Chris Klein
Votes: 104,397 | Gross: $14.88M
Election is a decent comedy and probably the last worthwhile thing in Matthew Broderick's filmography until that Super Bowl commercial.
36. Starship Troopers (1997)
R | 129 min | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi
Humans, in a fascist militaristic future, wage war with giant alien bugs.
Director: Paul Verhoeven | Stars: Casper Van Dien, Denise Richards, Dina Meyer, Jake Busey
Votes: 320,718 | Gross: $54.81M
Starship Troopers is better the 1st time & the FX don't hold up well, but I can't say that I entirely regret it. Watch it once then move on.
37. Joint Security Area (2000)
Not Rated | 110 min | Action, Drama, Thriller
After a shooting incident at the North-South Korean border DMZ leaves two North Korean soldiers dead, a neutral Swiss and Swedish team investigates what actually happened.
Director: Park Chan-wook | Stars: Lee Yeong-ae, Lee Byung-hun, Song Kang-ho, Kim Tae-woo
Votes: 34,143
Joint Security Area was engaging, sensitive, and thus far the only police procedural that I have ever liked, so I highly recommend it.
38. Inception (2010)
PG-13 | 148 min | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi
A thief who steals corporate secrets through the use of dream-sharing technology is given the inverse task of planting an idea into the mind of a C.E.O., but his tragic past may doom the project and his team to disaster.
Director: Christopher Nolan | Stars: Leonardo DiCaprio, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Elliot Page, Ken Watanabe
Votes: 2,547,123 | Gross: $292.58M
Inception is a great popcorn flick once you're out of diapers (and have outgrown Armageddon), but I'd skip the ho-hum Rifftrax for this one.
39. The Hunted (2003)
R | 94 min | Action, Crime, Drama
An FBI deep-woods tracker attempts to capture a trained assassin who has made a sport of hunting humans.
Director: William Friedkin | Stars: Tommy Lee Jones, Benicio Del Toro, Connie Nielsen, Leslie Stefanson
Votes: 51,364 | Gross: $34.24M
The Hunted jumps the shark in ten minutes when Tommy Lee Jones helps a wild wolf out of a sneer then rubs salve on its wound. *beep*
40. The Descendants (2011)
R | 115 min | Comedy, Drama
A land baron tries to reconnect with his two daughters after his wife is seriously injured in a boating accident.
Director: Alexander Payne | Stars: George Clooney, Shailene Woodley, Amara Miller, Nick Krause
Votes: 251,627 | Gross: $82.58M
The Descendants is near perfect, worth its value if only for Clooney, its only detraction being a bit of whiny monologue at the beginning.
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