From Far & Wide, From High & Low Vol 24
A diverse lot of 100 titles from my personal, hard copy collection
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- DirectorMark JonesStarsWarwick DavisJennifer AnistonKen OlandtAn evil, sadistic Leprechaun goes on a killing rampage in search of his beloved pot of gold.LEPRECHAUN was the brainchild of Mark RUMPELSTILTSKIN Jones who borrowed as much from Freddy Krueger movies & Bugs Bunny cartoons as Irish lore. Also hits like CRITTERS and CHILD'S PLAY made it an attractive low budget slasher for fledgling studio Trimark to pursue. The finished film sat on the shelf for 2 years before finding a renewed lease on life on the video rental market due to the casting of a then-unknown Jennifer Aniston who shot to superstardom immediately after as Rachel on FRIENDS. She radiates charisma as a spoiled city girl who finds life in the country even more unbearable when the LEPRECHAUN locked in her farm's basement escapes and goes on a killing spree. Dwarf Warwick WILLOW Davis plays the gold-hoarding demon with a shoe fetish for cheap laughs under pounds of repulsive make up. Gabriel Bartalos who created 1992s MUNCHIE designed LERPRECAUN and the low-end gore. The violence doesn't play well with the lame gags on prominant display dimishing what little weight this carried as a horror pic. Slasher fans/gorehounds won't find much to love with the sparse bodycount or the relatively bloodless presentation of those crimes. Handsome Ken SUPER FORCE Olandt, Robert SOMETIMES THEY COME BACK Gorman & Mark PEE-WEE'S BIG ADVENTURES Holton play a trio of painters who help their friend save the farm. Based on a 1980s horror comic book explaining how the LEPRECHAUN came to be captured by a man named O'Grady which is touched on in the prologue. Followed by 7 sequels to date.
- DirectorRodman FlenderStarsWarwick DavisCharlie HeathShevonne DurkinOn his one thousandth birthday, an evil leprechaun selects the descendant of one of his slaves to have as his bride, leaving it up to the girl's boyfriend to save her.Warwick MALIFICENT: MISTRESS OF EVIL Davis returned for this soft reboot of the unexpectedly durable franchise which concerns the murderous activities of a LEPRECHAUN. The Irish demon's been given an endless supply of superpowers similar to what genre addicts have seen with Freddy (A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET), The Creeper (JEEPERS CREEPERS) & the WISHMASTER. His abilities are however limited should he lose possession of his stash of gold and he can be killed by wrought iron. Leps is allergic like vamps are to splinters of wood. <This according to Alfredo WRONG TURN 2: DEAD END Septien & Turi CANDYMAN 3: DAY OF THE DEAD Meyer who scripted. Rodman THE UNBORN Flender directed this sub-par slasher which was peppered with low-brow gags fueled by Warwick's chewing the scenery. LEPRECHAUN 2 finds the creature awakened from a 1000 year slumber and on the prowl for a bride played by Shevonne TAMMY & THE T-REX Durkin. She already has a limo-driving boyfriend; Charlie THE BEVERLY HILLBILLIES Heath. Sandy THE MUNSTERS SCARY LITTLE CHRISTMAS Baron co-stars as the sleazy proprietor of a celebrity tour service operating out of L.A. A brief cameo from Kimmy TWIN PEAKS Robertson & Clint 3 FROM HELL Howard is just about the only bright spot in this under-achiever which would be the last in the franchise to receive a theatrical release until the 2014 flop LEPRECHAUN ORIGINS. The bloodshed and gore (slightly more of it than the 1st) was courtesy of Gabrielle THE UNBORN II Bartalos and Todd HOWLING VI: THE FREAKS Masters. Followed by the direct-to-video hit LEPRECHAUN 3.
- DirectorBrian Trenchard-SmithStarsWarwick DavisJohn GatinsLee ArmstrongAn evil leprechaun finds himself in Las Vegas, where he proceeds to cause mischief by killing people, granting twisted wishes, and infecting a young man with his green blood.Cackling, prancing Warwick HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS PART 2 Davis is back as the psychotic LEPRECHAUN who somehow survived being blown to bits at the end of LEPRECHAUN 2 and is resurrected for LEPRECHAUN 3: IN VEGAS via a plot twist swiped from the tv movie classic TRILOGY OF TERROR. The Irish monster with a fake accent bigger than he is arrives in a Las Vegas pawn shop in the form of a gold statuette. When a medallion worn by the idol is detached Davis returns to maniacal life determined to double the body-count of the 1st film while in search of a bride. Lee MAGIC ISLAND Armstrong plays the unlucky gal who's caught the repulsive monster's eye opposite scant leading man John FRED 2: NIGHT OF THE LIVING FRED Gatins. Neither are any good but at least Gatins could find work afterwards. Of the handful of barely recognizable actors in the cast (Marchelo TREMORS 2: AFTERSHOCKS Tubert, Tom HELLRAISER: BLOODLINES Dugay, Michael THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN RIDE Callen, etc) veteran scream queen Caroline STEPFATHER 2: MAKE ROOM FOR DADDY Williams comes across best with the material which is never really especially clever or scary. The plot which hinges on a wish-granting gold coin was scripted by David Dubos who also wrote the obscure and forgotten anthology FUTURE SHOCK. The supernatural slasher is violent but the old school practical make-up effects are pedestrian at best with Gabriel THE OUTING Bartalos & Patricia OMEN IV: THE AWAKENING Murray sharing the duties under the the direction of Brian MEGIDDO: THE OMEGA CODE 2 Trenchard-Smith. LEPRECHAUN 3: IN VEGAS became the surprise direct-to-video hit of 1995 & was followed by LEPRECHAUN 4: IN SPACE.
- DirectorBrian Trenchard-SmithStarsWarwick DavisBrent JasmerJessica CollinsOur deadly leprechaun is in space to woo a beautiful princess who is impressed with his gold and desires to separate him from it.Veteran character actor Warwick Davis has been surrounded by the best In the entertainment industry and has secured his place in popular culture a dozen times over for his contributions to the cinematic worlds of STAR WARS and HARRY POTTER. Davis is also known for starring in 6 of the 8 slasher pics in the mildly disreputable LEPRECHAUN francise between 1993-2003. This installment set in the year 2096 finds Davis playing the Irish imp as an alien who intends to marry a spoiled Dominian Princess to inherit the title of King of the Universe. Space marines ala James Cameron's ALIENS have been dispatched to rescue the future queen (Rebecca A MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN Carlton) but the mission goes bad when the demonic dwarf teleports into the bladder of a soldier and then later peed back into existance aboard a orbiting spaceship run by a Nazi cyborg named Dr. Mittenhands (Guy MEGIDDO: THE OMEGA CODE 2 Siner). Mittenhands needs the princess because her dna allows tissue regeneration. It's also coustomary for spoiled Domanian queens to sentence people to death by flashing their boobs so expect to see some of that. LEPRECHAUN 4: IN SPACE cost nearly 3 million to pay for decent early CG animations provided by Craig Seitz who got his start in fantasy/horror with THE LAWNMOWER MAN 2: JOBE'S WAR and is known to younger audiences for blockbusters like THE HUNGER GAMES: MOCKINGJAY PART 2 or DR. STRANGE. The make ups and fabrications by artist Gabriel BASKET CASE 3: THE PROGENY are iffy at times but I do like the design of the LEPRECHAUN. THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFIUL's Brent Jasmer and THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS's Jessica Collins make for an attractive couple but are effortlessly upstaged by co-star Miguel FRIDAY THE 13TH PART V: A NEW BEGINNING Perez who was given some quips by screenwrite Dennis KICKBOXER 3: THE ART OF WAR Pratt. This gimmick slasher works better than it should thanks to director Brian AZTEC REX Trenchard-Smith who homages everything from FLASH GORDON to THE FLY while navigating those claustrophobic sets with surprising grace. Quite tolerable and followed by LEPRECHAUN 5: IN THE HOOD.
- DirectorRob SperaStarsWarwick DavisIce-TAnthony MontgomeryWhen three rappers want to get even with a pimp, they accidentally unleash a leprechaun who goes on a killing rampage in tha 'hood.LEPRECHAUN 5: IN THE HOOD was the 5th and least interesting entry in the lowly slasher franchise that tried to refresh itself with a touch of blaxploitation & lame gags. The comedy bits that work best were provided by homunculus actor Warwick WILLOW Davis (who's always fun to watch) and co-star Ice-T (FRANKENPENIS) as rap mogul Mack Daddy. Daddy obtained the statuette of the Irish demon which is imprisoned by a gold medallion. 3 saggy pants wannabe rappers (Anthony STAR TREK: ENTERPRISE Montgomery, Rasham FAKIN' DA FUNK Nall & Red THE WATERMELON HEIST Grant) steal a golden flute & the medallion accidentally releasing the quippy creature who then slaughters as many as inhumanly possible. Gabriel MUNCHIE Bartalos really dropped the ball this time. The kills are sloppy, cheap and never convincing. The design of the LEPRECHAUN was especially poor. Likewise the digital effects supervised by Erich IT CAME FROM OUTER SPACE II Hicks need not have bothered. I knocked a star off for the excessive, repetitive profanity which passes itself off as blaxploitation but added a star for Davis' campy throw-down over the closing credits. The composer of the score featured heavily throughout was provided by Nicolas CHILDREN IN AMERICAS SCHOOLS WITH BILL MOYER Rivera. William THE DARK PARTY Wells & Doug BLACK-ISH Hall sketched everything out on paper for director Rob Spera who made the 1988 video WITCHCRAFT. Look for likeable character actress Bebe SANFORD ARMS Drake as Postmaster P's mom. This was one of the last movies distributed by Trimark who passed the torch to Lionsgate in 2003 for LEPRECHAUN 6: BACK 2 THA HOOD.
- DirectorSteven AyromlooiStarsWarwick DavisTangi MillerLaz AlonsoWhen Emily Woodrow and her friends happen on a treasure chest full of gold coins, they fail to heed the warnings of a wise old psychic, who had foretold that they would encounter trouble with a very nasty and protective Leprechaun.Entertainment Weekly once listed LEPRECHAUN 6: BACK 2 THA HOOD (I ain't lyin'! Writer/director Steven Ayromlooi thinks black folks write like that) as one of the worst sequels ever made. It's not that bad! It's not as reliant on ugly stereotypes to sell the blaxploitation angle as 2000s LEPRECHAUN 5: IN THE HOOD was either although EW was quoted stating the unknown Ayromlooi made a movie offensive enough to start a race riot. A handful of young urban friends discover a pot of gold at the site of an abandoned community facility. The gold belongs to a murderous demon introduced in an animated sequence explaining his origin and how he was later buried there after a magical duel with a civil rights activist who intended to use the treasure to bring prosperity to his impoverished neighborhood. The kids who find the loot mostly want to buy pot which is okay as it later gives star Warrick THE HITCH-HIKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY Davis an opportunity to play the LEPRECHAUN stoned. It's the only funny scene in the movie. This would be Davis' 6th and final appearance in the franchise and the last made until 2014s LEPECHAUN: ORIGINS. Most of the carnage is magically inflicted as the evil dwarf embarks on another spree to reclaim his gold. Kent TIMECOP 2: THE BERLIN DECISION Butterworth handled the less than dazzling visual FX. If there's anything nice to be said about this minor entry in the surprisingly enduring series it's that the casting department put some talented actors on screen to headline with the iconic lead. Tangi FELICITY Miller, Laz THE BOYS Alonzo & Page THE MEG Kennedy are better than the material they've been given to work with as is Donzaleigh MRS. EVER'S BOYS Abernathy as a voodoo priestess. Look for Sticky HOUSE OF THE DEAD 2 Fingaz in a supporting role.
- DirectorZach LipovskyStarsDylan PostlStephanie BennettAndrew DunbarNot related to the previous Leprechaun films. Two young couples backpacking through Ireland discover that one of Ireland's most famous legends is a terrifying reality.The WWE obtained the rights to this reboot of the LEPRECHAUN franchise as a star vehicle for midget wrestler Dylan 'Hornswoggle' Postl who's interpretation of the character is lightyears behind Warwick Davis's iconic performance. Davis who appeared in 6 previous installments of the occasionally popular slasher series wisely decided to sit this flop out. Postl is unrecognizable as an Irish demon identified as a Tuatha De Danann. The rarely seen monster looks like a pre-teen nosferatu and has no dialogue. Once freed from it's gold-mine prison it runs amok in the countryside looking for it's stolen treasure and slaughtering anyone who crosses it's path. To make peace with the leprechaun the villages leader Hamish (Gary SUPERBABIES: BABY GENIUSES 2 Chalk) agrees to make human sacrifice in exchange for the nuggets stolen from it's mine shaft. Hamish and the rest of the villagers later welcome four tourists into their cursed community (Andrew CHERISHED MEMORIES: A GIFT TO REMEMBER 2 Dunbar, Stephanie THE UNAUTHORIZED FULL HOUSE STORY Bennett, Brendan BLOODRAYNE: THE THIRD REICH Fletcher & Melisa THE MARINE 4: MOVING TARGET Roxbourgh) intending to feed them to the beast. Zack TASMANIAN DEVILS Lipovshy directed this garbage based on a terrible script by writers Harris HOUSE OF DARKNESS Wilkinson & Sholom JERSEY SHORE SHARK ATTACK Gelt. This was the 1st theatrically released pic since 1994s LEPRECHAUN 2 and possibly the last considering how badly it BOMBED. Fans ignored LEPRECAUN: ORIGINS in droves and have nothing nice to say about it or the sloppy practical make-up effects applied sparingly throughout. Followed by the vastly superior SyFy TV movie sequel LEPRECHAUN RETURNS
- DirectorSteven KostanskiStarsTaylor SpreitlerPepi SonugaSai BennettThe Leprechaun returns once again, when a group of girls unwillingly awaken him after they tear down a cabin so that they can build a new sorority house.LEPRECHAUN RETURNS is the 8th film in the infrequently popular slasher franchise which disregards the 2014 WWE reboot in favor of this SyFy telepic sequel to the original 1993 Jennifer Aniston/Warwick Davis hit. It's also one of the better entries thanks to writer Susan Keilly who tweeked the recast Irish demon with creative new superpowers and remembered to load the script with playful pop culture riffs. Taylor AMITYVILLE: THE AWAKENING Spreitler plays Aniston's young daughter who travels to the farm with her sorority sisters to upgrade the property. The tiny monster her mother imprisoned at the bottom of a well using the magic of a four leaf clover is freed accidently and embarks on a murder rampage. Warwick Davis turned his nose up at the thought of doing a 7th pic leaving the iconic role to the not-nearly-as-good Lindon Porco who also body-doubled a serial killer for 2017's CULT OF CHUCKY. The only returning actor from the series is Nick GACY Holton who came out of retirement to reappear as the gas station attendant named Ozzie. His knowlege of folklore makes him a valuable ally even from beyond the grave. Director Stephen MANBORG Kostanski doesn't shy away from the gore and the network spent a little more cash than they usually do. This brisk follow-up has me right in the mood for LEPRECHAUN IX!
- DirectorBrett LeonardStarsJack ThompsonMatthew Le NevezSteve BastoniAgents of an oil tycoon vanish while exploring a swamp marked for drilling. The local sheriff investigates and faces a Seminole legend come to life: Man-Thing, a shambling swamp-monster whose touch burns those who feel fear.MAN-THING was a cultish Marvel super-hero created by Steve Gerber who also designed the niche HOWARD THE DUCK for the comic book giant. This atrocious SyFy TV movie about an Indian spirit awakened in the swamp to strike back at those who would harm the environment bears little resemblance to the fondly remembered character. Hans THE SKULLS II Rodionoff botched the re-imagining by writing MAN-THING as if he'd never read a single issue. Director Brett THE LAWNMOWER MAN Leonard also has no grasp whatsoever on the character and fails to articulate the monster properly even with the wonder of CG at his disposal. MAN-THING ranks among the worst Marvel-based projects ever greenlit including HOWARD THE DUCK, Roger Corman's THE FANTASTIC FOUR, Hasselhoff's NICK FURY: AGENT OF S.H.I.E.L.D. & Albert Pyun's CAPTAIN AMERICA. Matthew THE LIZZIE BORDEN CHRONICLES Le Nevez and Rachael 666 PARK AVENUE Taylor took top billing in this banal DOG that makes THE RETURN OF SWAMP THING look like CITIZEN KANE by comparison.
- DirectorWillard HuyckStarsLea ThompsonJeffrey JonesTim RobbinsA sarcastic humanoid duck is pulled from his homeworld to Earth where he must stop an alien invasion with the help of a nerdy scientist and a struggling female rock singer.HOWARD THE DUCK was a character appearing in Marvel Comics created by Steve Gerber as a spin-off of the cultish MAN-THING. Considering the amazing catalogue of characters the publisher carries the niche superhero satire seemed an odd choice for George STAR WARS EPISODE I: THE PHANTOM MENACE Lucas to build a movie around even armed with the folks at Industrial Light & Magic & a carte blanche budget courtesy of Lucas Films & Universal. There was a CAPTAIN AMERICA serial produced in the 1940s but I'm not sure the character had been acquired by Marvel at that point so technically HOWARD THE DUCK may have been the 1st theatrical pic based on their catalogue. The studio crank blockbusters out today like Big Macs but they were off to a rocky start with HOWARD THE DUCK! The over-produced science-fiction/comedy BOMBED spectacularly becoming one of the most notorious box office failures in Hollywood History. It is unquestionably the worst super-hero movie ever made beating out strong contenders that includes David Hasselhoff's NICK FURY, Roger Corman's THE FANTASTIC FOUR & Albert Pyun's CAPTAIN AMERICA! It's developed a cult following in recent years but is mostly remembered for the staggering number of Golden Raspberry Awards it nabbed. Worst Supporting Actor (Robbins), Worst Director (Huyck), Worst Song nominations gave way to wins in the catagories of; Worst Screenplay, Worst New Star (The 7 actors crammed inside the duck suit), & Worst Movie of 1986 (managing a tie with Prince's UNDER THE CHERRY MOON). The action centers on a crusty, cigar-chomping duck teleported to our world by a mad scientist. Convicted child-sex offender Jeffrey RAVENOUS Jones played the inventor who's experiments threaten to consume our world with the pending arrival of the Dark Overlord. The plucky duck meets a rocker chick named Beverley who's looking for new management and a feathery friend in her bedroom. Lea THE LITTLE RASCALS Thompson had the misfortune of playing opposite the unattractive and badly articulated duck costumed actors. The pair buddy up with a cleaner named Phil (Tim ERIK THE VIKING Robbins) to try to defeat an inter-dimensional threat. William Huych wrote/directed HOWARD THE DUCK along with his wife Gloria Katz and were hired because of their long association with their executive producer dating back to 1973s AMERICAN GRAFFITI. Both are capable of Oscar caliber work but mostly they're known for BOMBS like LUCKY LADY & RADIOLAND MURDERS. They would not have been my 1st choice to make a film of this magnitude. Maybe Lucas counted on his brilliant special effects artists to carry the heavy lifting but he was sadly mistaken. The effects are bombastic, loud, cartoonish and forgettable. This DOG is widely considered to be one of the worst movies ever made & rightfully so. Cinematic masochists such as myself watch HOWARD THE DUCK as a double feature with the equally wretched tv movie MAN-THING for maximum soul crushing impact. ESSENTIAL viewing for the Ed Wood crowd. Others, beware...
- DirectorCurtis HarringtonStarsPiper LaurieStuart WhitmanRoger DavisSixteen years after Ruby Claire's gangster boyfriend was shot and killed by four associates, a series of gruesome murders takes place at the drive-in movie theatre she now owns. Meanwhile, the behaviour of her mute daughter Leslie is becoming increasingly strange and a visiting psychic claims that forces from beyond are out for revenge.Curtis VOYAGE TO THE PREHISTORIC PLANET Harrington never got the love and attention he deserved as an indie horror film director & RUBY may be his unsung masterpiece. Fresh off her Oscar nominated role as Margaret White in CARRIE Piper Laurie is equally unforgettable as the mother of a mute girl who is possessed by the spirit of her father. Leslie Claire's (Janit BORN INNOCENT Baldwin) father was a handsome goon Ruby became infatuated with during her days as a showgirl. Ruby's gangster lover didn't take kindly to Nicky knocking up his top lounge act and had his rival gunned down on the very night of Leslie Claire's birth! The child hasn't spoken a word since but when Ruby decides to institutionalize the girl in a drunken rage Nicky's vengeful ghost embarks on a killing spree at Ruby's drive-in theatre during a showing of THE ATTACK OF THE 50 FOOT WOMAN. In addition to chewing the scenery in the highest style Miss. Laurie also throws in a creepy lesbian scene with her daughter at no extra charge. SUPERBOY's Jonathan Kent Stuart Whitman co-stars as RUBY's lover who's on the receiving end of Nicky's supernatural fury. Roger DARK SHADOWS Davis plays a paranormal investigator and psychiatrist brought in as a faint hope of saving Leslie Claire who apes Linda Blair's performance in THE EXORCIST admirably at times. The densely packed script was prepared by Steven JENNIFER Krantz, George THE KILLING KIND Edwards and Barry CLASS OF 1984 Schneider. To capitalize on the jump-scare made famous by Brian de Palma at the end of CARRIE the producers ordered a trick ending hastily filmed by Stephanie THE VELVET VAMPIRE Rothman to tack on as a finale for RUBY. It's so tacky neither Harrington nor Laurie would participate in it's creation although the gimmick did sell a lot of tickets. Grammy winning composer Don THE FRENCH CONNECTION Ellis worked on the score which featured Laurie singing an original torch song called Love's So Easy. Highly recommended.
- DirectorBob KelljanStarsRobert QuarryRoger PerryMichael MurphyA couple invites a Count from Hungary, who recently immigrated to America, to conduct a seance for the woman's recently deceased mother, oblivious to the fact that he is actually a vampire.The always under-used Robert DR. PHIBES RISES AGAIN Quarry starred in this nifty A.I.P. drive-in cult classic as a sinister spiritualist with a thirst for hippy chick blood! Count Yorga poses as a mystic to transform the believers into his vampire brides starting with Judy THE PSYCHO LOVER Lang. When she begins eating the family cat one night after a seance her doctor (Roger THE THING WITH TWO HEADS Perry) and best friend (Mike RESCUE FROM GILLIGAN'S ISLAND Macready) begin sharpening their stakes. Quarry manages to keep a straight face sporting a cape along side a younger cast decked out in those retina-searing polyester outfits popular at the time. COUNT YORGA, VAMPIRE! may look hopelessly mired in the early 70s but writer/director Bob SCREAM, BLACULA, SCREAM Kelljan takes a very fresh and modern approach to vampirism. Quarry's vampire is sophisticated but ferocious & animalistic like his blood-thirsty undead brides. Compared to the later Hammer DRACULA film this surprise hit came as a breath of fresh air. Followed by THE RETURN OF COUNT YORGA
- CreatorConstance M. BurgeStarsHolly Marie CombsAlyssa MilanoBrian KrauseThree Halliwell sisters discover that they are descendants of a line of good female witches and are destined to fight against the forces of evil, using their combined power of witchcraft known as the "Power of Three".CHARMED was the smash-hit supernatural drama created by Constance M. Burge who also designed the guilty-pleasure soap SAVANNAH for the WB network. SAVANNAH (which was also produced by Aaron DYNASTY II: THE COLBYS Spelling) was displaced on the schedule by BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER and subsequently cancelled despite a promising start. Burge's response was to build the best Buffy rip-off anyone could imagine. CHARMED ran for 8 seasons between 1998-2006 and starred Shannon Doherty as the telepath Prue Halliwell; the eldest of 3 sisters gifted with witchcraft. Doherty was recently ousted from the cast of BEVERLY HILLS 90210 after 4 tumultuous seasons on the hit soap with tabloid headliness Spelling out (<see what I did there?) tension on the set. Her relationships with castmates Holly PRETTY LITTLE LIARS Marie Combs (as middle sibling Piper) and Alyssa MELROSE PLACE Milano (as youngest sister Phoebe) during her 3 season run was also combative and resulted in her being fired. Ironically, Phoebe who had the power to see the future didn't see that happening! To maintain the power of three integrity of the Halliwell coven the time-freezing Piper welcomed, long-lost, half-sister Paige Matthews to their San Francisco home. Paige (future me too character assassin Rose PLANET TERROR McGowen) was a hybrid between a whitelighter and a witch. Whitelighters are angellic protectors sent by powerful, unseen forces to guide and protect. The Halliwell's whitelighter was played for 7 seasons by Brian SLEEPWALKERS Krause who only appeared as a guest star during the budget-cut final season. Leo; as he was known, began playing a renovator hired by the sisters to fix up the house left to the women in their mother's will although his good intentions are soon revealed. Leo and Piper eventually marry and have 2 male children; Wyatt in season 5 and Chris in the 6th. Drew ARMY WIVES Fuller (Chris) played the time-travelling young man sent TERMINATOR-style into the past to prevent his evil brother from destroying the earth! Dorian BAYWATCH NIGHTS Gregory lent a supprting hand as a cop on the force who assists the witches on the mortal plane but was frequently drawn into their campy adventures set in alternate realities or hellish dimensions. Julian FANTASTIC FOUR: RISE OF THE SILVER SURFER McMahon played a hot demon named Cole sent to kill the Halliwell ladies but winds up falling madly for Phoebe. Brad LOIS AND CLARK: THE NEW ADVENTURES OF SUPERMAN Kern who seized control of CHARMED after Burge's departure introduced another telekinetic witch named Billy to the fold hoping to land a spin-off but the actress who played her (Kaley Couco) opted to join the cast of the insanely popular THE BIG BANG THEORY instead. A steady LOVE BOAT-style roaster of guest stars lent to CHARMED's empty-headed appeal. I rather enjoyed this occasionally serialized fantasy which borrowed as much from CHARLIE'S ANGELS as it did while ripping off the far superior BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER/ANGEL. Hot on the heels of the successful reimagining of Aaron Spelling's DYNASTY for the CW a remake featuring a new trio of CHARMED ones made it's debut in 2018.
- DirectorThomas J. ChurchillStarsKyle LowderSadie KatzBrandon Alan SmithMembers of a documentary crew meet a mysterious man who seems to possess supernatural powers at a crumbling manor.Did a double-take when Lionsgate's logo popped up before this umpteenth calamityville began to lull me to sleep cuz I knew going in this was not worthy of mainstream distribution nor was THE AMITYVILLE HARVEST connected to the Lutz family's Amityville hoax. Vincent Miller (aging DAYS OF OUR LIVES heart-throb Kyle Lowder) plays the least interesting vampire I've ever seen on film who runs a supernatural funeral home along with a few psychotic goons. Of the group Jan SKY SHARKS Birch makes the best of what little he has to work with as Clyde the driver of the hearse. The actor channels Bill Moseley from 3 FROM HELL while another pitches fits down in the morgue in Leatherface drag. Christine (Sadie WRONG TURN 6: LAST RESORT Katz) and her documentary film crew (no one you know) get locked inside only to be picked off by the creeps. Gorehounds with be disgusted at the ketchup stain killings and others will be turned off at the absence of any nudity. Writer/director William Churchhill recycles as much footage as possibe from his earlier backyard rip-off THE DAY OF THE LIVING DEAD and still comes up short. Mostly, I was bored. Followed by THE AMITYVILLE MOON and THE AMITYVILLE RISING neither of which I intend to watch.
- DirectorMike FlanaganStarsEwan McGregorRebecca FergusonKyliegh CurranYears following the events of The Shining (1980), a now-adult Dan Torrance must protect a young girl with similar powers from a cult known as The True Knot, who prey on children with powers to remain immortal.DOCTOR SLEEP is the long-anticipated, best-selling sequel to Stephen King's 1977 classic novel THE SHINING and also the popular Stanley Kubrick film it inspired. Writer/director Mike GHOSTS OF HAMILTON STREET Flanigan does a respectable job reconsiling the events of both filmed versions of THE SHINING and the book with his own screenplay for DOCTOR SLEEP which deviates greatly at times from the source material. A lot of love was poured into recreating the haunted Overlook Hotel and the atmosphere of dread Kubrick made manifest with sharp audio cues and galvanizing visual effect sequences. The original characters have been cleverly recast with actors who not only offer flawless interpretations of their predecessors work but manage to give every scene their own distinctive spin. Henry THE HAUNTING OF HILL HOUSE Thomas, Alex THE HAUNTING OF BLY MANOR Essoe, Carl SUPERGIRL Lumbly and Roger Floyd step into roles once carried by the iconic Jack Nicholson, Shelley Duvall, Scatman Crothers and Danny Lloyd with utmost respect. Likewise, every sinister manifestation of evil the Overlook threw at the Torrance family from Grady to the ghostly twin girls to the rotting hag have been imaginatively redesigned for a new generation to enjoy unfortunately few ever did as DOCTOR SLEEP bombed. The movie was quite tolerable compared to the book which was terrible imo. King's sequel is mostly about a nomadic group of shining vampires called the True Knot who travel around the country in their caravan of RVs looking for psychic children to torture and murder. Rebecca DUNE Ferguson is fun as the cult's powerful leader who stores the lifeforce of dead kids in stainless steel urns to extend her unnatural life. Rose the Hat has set her 3rd, astral projecting eye on a magnificantly gifted girl named Abra whom the group intends to kidnap and devour. Abra's only hope in defeating the gang of energy vampires before they kill again may be a recovering alcoholic named Danny Torrance played by Ewan BIRDS OF PREY McGregor. Of the 3 leads young Kyliegh SECRETS OF SULPHUR SPRINGS Curran as the teenage vampire slayer comes across best although the material they've been given to work with a huge step down from 1977s THE SHINING and the final confrontation between our heroes, Rose the Hat and the hungry spirits at the hotel doesn't pack much punch. DOCTOR SLEEP is an absorbing film despite the bloated runtime. An even longer director's cut runs nearly 3 hours! Plans for a prequel based of the supernatural adventures of Dick Hallorann were quickly scrapped following the movies box office failure and talk of a ten part tv show based on the Overlook Hotel has gone quiet. I didn't hate it but have no plans on watching it again anytime soon.
- DirectorHarvey HartStarsKeir DulleaRobin WardGay RowanThree farmers in Cypress Corners discover that farm life is not so simple. Discovering a hidden door in the earth, they break through it, discovering they are not on Earth, but in a giant Noah's Ark-like spaceship. The spaceship is made up of giant "domes" holding the various cultures of humanity. Eventually, they find the bridge, its crew dead and its computer complaining that the ship is off-course, heading into the path of a distant sun. The three farmers take it upon themselves to travel the ship, contacting the various cultures of humanity in search of somebody who can correct the course of the ship and save mankind.THE STARLOST was a disastrously unsuccessful attempt by the CTV to produce a science fiction series for syndication with 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY star Keir Dullea cast in the lead. Devan and his friends Garth (Robin TO TELL THE TRUTH Ward) and Rachael (Gay REVENGE OF THE STEPFORD WIVES Rowan) become fugitives aboard a doomed spaceship containing countless domed cities representing the last survivors of planet earth. The expensive series allegedly cost a hundred thousand per episode to produce back in 1973 when the 16 shows initially aired. A significant percentage of the budget was earmarked for elaborate special effect shots made possible by an innovative camera system designed by famed artist Douglas Trumbull. The inventer was known for a string of classic films including CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND and BLADE RUNNER. Unfortunately the costly process didn't work and producers were immediately hamstrung to get the series to air with nothing to offer but painfully inadequate visuals. The promising adventure took another critical hit when the tempermental showrunner Harlan Ellison bailed before a single episode had aired. 10 episodes of the cultish flop were cobbled together to form 5 tv movies in the early 1980s the 1st of which was THE STARLOST: THE BEGINNING. It's comprised of the teleplays Voyage of Discovery and The Goddess Calabora. There's a vocal group of critics who rank THE STARLOST among the worst sci-fi shows of it's type including GALACTICA 1980 but it's not that bad. Hardcore genre addicts may appreciate this more than most.
- DirectorJoseph L. ScanlanEd RichardsonStarsKeir DulleaWilliam OslerGay RowanThree adventurers on a quest to save a giant spaceship from destruction encounter resistance from various residents of the isolated pods on the ship.Keir 2010: THE YEAR WE MAKE CONTACT Dullea, Robin Ward and Gay Rowan starred as a trio of fugitives aboard a doomed space ark 800 years in the future. Their adventures are aided or impaired by the Ark's central computer which was played by Nova Scotian actor William Osler. The fantastic spaceship comprised of 50 mile wide domed cities was designed by Oscar winning special effects artist Douglas SILENT RUNNING Trumbull. This ambitious Canadian syndicated series ran for 16 episodes back in 1973 and recieved terrible reviews mostly because of the painfully cheap special visual fx that wouldn't have cut it in FLASH GORDON serials from the 1930s. THE STARLOST: DECEPTION consisted of the teleplays Mr. Smith of Manchester and Gallery of Terror gently re-edited into this 1980 tv movie.
- DirectorFrancis ChapmanStarsKeir DulleaGay RowanRobin WardThe alien, Oro, seeks to seize control of huge spaceship bearing Earth's last survivors.THE STARLOST was a short-lived Canadian sci-fi series created by famed novelist Harlan Ellison in conjunction with Academy Award winning visual effects artist Douglas Trumbull who'd gained considerable fame for his contributions to films like 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY and SILENT RUNNING. Despite securing a solid base of syndication with American network NBC committed to carrying the show THE STARLOST was in freefall before the 1st episode made it to air. Ellison quit in a snit and the all-important camera system designed by Trumbull didn't work crippling the special effects department. THE STARLOST didn't look any worse than the serialized DOCTOR WHO on the BBC or LAND OF THE LOST on Saturday morning television but couldn't compete with reruns of LOST IN SPACE or STAR TREK in syndication and was suddenly cancelled after 16 episodes into it's freshman year. THE STARLOST: THE ALIEN ORO was a 1980 tv movie cobbled together from the teleplays The Alien Oro & The Return of Oro. Keir BLACK CHRISTMAS Dullea starred in this obscure and frequently maligned cult item.
- StarsKeir DulleaGay RowanRobin WardEdited down episodes "The Pisces" and "Farthing's Comet" from the 1973 television series "The Starlost" for this 1980 telemovie.The Society of Motion Picture Engineers has bestowed multiple honors to visual effects master Douglas Trumbull for his ground-breaking contributions to the arts which includes CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND, DRAGONSLAYER and BLADE RUNNER. After establishing himself in Hollywood for his rather bravura indie sci-fi pic SILENT RUNNING the innovative director approached the Canadian broadcaster CTV about producing a show for syndication. THE STARLOST was to be filmed using an all-new camera system designed by Trumbull which would eliminate the need for costly sets. Based on a sales pitch filmed using 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY star Keir WELCOME TO BLOOD CITY Dullea as an incentive and the reputation of famed fantasy novelist Harlan Ellison attached the project went ahead with an unheard of $100,000 allotted for each episode. Unfortunately Trumbull's invention never worked and the money for the FX was already spent. What made it to air over the span of 16 occasionally pitiful episodes looked about as bad as Sid & Marty Croft's Saturday morning kid's show LIDSVILLE with Charles Nelson Reilly. Ellison who was no stranger to taking his name off flops like THE OSCAR and VALLEY OF THE DOLLS bailed as show-runner the minute panic set in at the network. Canada's answer to STAR TREK tanked in the ratings and was met by almost universal contempt from critics who insist to this day THE STARLOST is one of the worst shows of it's type ever made. That said, the two installments cut together to form this 1980 tv movie (The Pisces and Farthing's Comet) were among the least interesting of a bad lot. Painful to look at and boring!
- DirectorHarvey HartPeter LevinStarsKeir DulleaGay RowanRobin WardEdited down episodes "Astro-Medics" and "The Implant People" from the 1973 television series "The Starlost" for this 1980 telemovie.THE STARLOST was a disastrous attempt by Canada's CTV to launch a prestigious, well-produced science fiction series for syndication. The expensive show was conceived by Harlen Ellison who provided teleplays for a dozen different programs including VOYAGE TO THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA and LOGAN'S RUN. The argumentative writer bailed as soon as it was discovered that the innovative camera system which ate a sizable chunk of the 100,000 per episode budget didn't work! Hotshot special effects whiz Douglas Trumbull who became a legend over night for his visually thrilling cult classic SILENT RUNNING sold CTV on the sophisticated concept which would work provided they purchase his invention. Unfortunately it never worked leaving the special effects department hamstrung with substandard bluescreens and unconvincing miniatures. Character actor Keir Dullea who gained iconic fame for 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY and 2010: THE YEAR WE MAKE CONTACT led the cast as a survivor of the planet earth which perished during a galactic catastrophe an eon before. Devan and his two hippy friends discover they are on board a space ark comprised of countless domed biospheres and that the ark is itself on a collision course with a star unless the young adventurers can find someone smart enough to pilot the ship. Novelist Ben Bova was brought in as an advisor but was so appalled by his experience working on what many have described as one of the worst science fiction series ever made he wrote a gossipy 'tell-all' account in his 1975 satire The Starcrossed. In 1980 10 episodes of this cultish FLOP were slapped together to form 5 direct-to-video movies modified to include a new opening credits sequence thrown together on the cheap. Episodes 11 & 12 (The Astro-Medics & The Implant People) were selected to sell THE STARLOST: THE INVASION to video. Buyer beware.
- DirectorKevin KölschDennis WidmyerStarsJason ClarkeAmy SeimetzJohn LithgowDr. Louis Creed and his wife, Rachel, relocate from Boston to rural Maine with their two young children. The couple soon discover a mysterious burial ground hidden deep in the woods near their new home.PET SEMATARY is the second, slightly superior adaption of the popular 1983 best-seller by Stephen King. Screenwriters Matt THE PROPHECY II Greenberg and Jeff THE MIDNIGHT MEAT TRAIN Buhler tweeked the novel by providing a more atriculate threat than what we encountered in the 1989 version by Mary Lambert. Purists may balk at the changes but the enjoyable cast sells the new material with a straight face. The directors weren't as successful getting certain key plot points to the screen. I won't spoil them other to say the changes are artlessly telegraphed to audiences from a mile away. More experienced directors would have handled it better than Dennis SCREAM: THE SERIES Widmyre and Kevin MAMA II Kolsch but why quibble? This is better than the book, Lambert's pic and 1992s PET SEMATARY TWO by a noticable margin. Dr. Louis Creed (Jason DAWN OF THE PLANET OF THE APES Clarke) & his wife Rachel (Amy ALIEN COVENANT Seimetz) move to the Maine town of Ludlow. Along with are their young daughter Ellie (Jete SNEAKY PETE Lawrence), toddler son Gage and the family cat Church. The town of Ludlow, the Creeds learn from their grizzled neighbor Jud (John RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES Lithgow) has a dark secret. In the woods past the dangerous highway is a patch of burial earth made sour by the taint of Indian magic. Despite knowing the legend of the Wendingo and ghostly warnings from beyond the grave when the cat is run over by a speeding truck Louis has to find out the hard way sometimes dead is better. This is a wonderfully bleak and morbid film punctuated with a few jet-black chuckles and well placed scares. Paramount has announced a prequel based on Ludlow (also the setting of THE DARK HALF) and Jud's first encounter with the demons at the sematary.
- DirectorVince EdwardsChristian I. Nyby IIStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneRunning low on fuel, the Battlestar Galactica receives the help of the supposedly lost Battlestar Pegasus which is taking the offensive with the Cylons.MISSION GALACTICA: THE CYLON ATTACK was a theatrical sequel to 1978s BATTLESTAR GALACTICA edited together using 3 epidodes (The Living Legend Parts 1 & 2 and Fire In Space) of the briefly popular, sci-fi classic. The kid friendly ABC series was struggling in the ratings so almost every special effects shot was recycled from the pilot episode Saga of a Star World. Lloyd ROCKETSHIP X-M Bridges guest stars as the commander of the battlestar Pegasus who joins the crew of the Galactica on a dangerous Cylon raid which will decide the fate of humanity. Lorne GALACTICA 1980 Greene, Dirk THE A-TEAM Benedict & Richard THE STREETS OF SAN FRANSICO Hatch starred in this slick STAR WARS rip-off from series creator Glen BUCK ROGERS IN THE 25TH CENTURY Larson.
- DirectorTom CleggStarsMartin LandauBarbara BainCatherine SchellLunar colonists of Moonbase Alpha are marooned in space after a nuclear explosion pushes the Moon out of its orbit and a rescue spaceship from the Earth is not what it seems to be.Gerry & Sylvia Anderson were the legendary husband/wife production team who heralded in fabulous series like CAPTAIN SCARLET AND THE MYSTERIONS, THUNDERBIRDS and the kitschy live-action adventure U.F.O. SPACE: 1999 was their final collaboration and is among their most polished and fondly remembored creations. The gorgeously designed series was one of the most expensive to air in syndication with much of it's budget set aside for some truly eye-catching miniature effects and the casting of married actors Martin Landeau & Barbara Bain who spent five years together at the top of the ratings on MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE. The stylish program which ran for 2 seasons between 1975-1977 concerned the inhabitants of Moonbase Alpha and their fight to survive after a nuclear blast has torn the moon out of earth orbit. DESTINATION: MOONBASE ALPHA was a theatrical release of the 2 part second season episode The Bringers of Wonder which also starred Catherine Schell as a shape-shifting metamorph. The show's opening was changed to a STAR WARS style scroll with a retcon of the pilot Breakaway incorporating several minutes of memorable pyrotechnics and dazzling special effects. Genre addicts won't kick this genuine cult classic out of bed.
- DirectorCharles CrichtonLee H. KatzinBill LennyStarsMartin LandauBarbara BainBarry MorseEarth's Moon is the site of Moonbase Alpha, a scientific research colony nestled in the crater Plato. Staffed by over 300 men and women from Earth, it is the operations center for several space expeditions. It is also a watchdog for vast amounts of atomic waste from Earth stored in silos on the Moon's far side. Magnetic radiation builds up and causes the wastes to explode with such force that the Earth's centripetal pull on the Moon is overcome, and the Moon is broken free of Earth's orbit to drift at incredible speed out of the Solar System off the plane of the ecliptic. The survivors on Moonbase Alpha are unable to return to Earth and must survive in unknown space on their wandering Moon. They encounter a planet whose advanced people project an illusion of a devastating attack on Moonbase.ALIEN ATTACK was a direct-to-video movie drawn from 2 1st season episodes of the dated science fiction series SPACE: 1999. The pilot Breakaway dealt with Commander Koenig (Martin TUCKER: A MAN AND HIS DREAM Landeau), Dr. Russell (Barbara MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE Bain) & Prof. Bergman (Barry FUNERAL HOME Morse) trying to keep the inhabitants of lunar colony Alpha One alive when a magnetic firestorm triggers an explosion which hurtles the moon into deep space. War Games was the 17th episode of the season which gave special effects artist Brian 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY Johnson plenty of opportunity to flex his muscle. This episode finds the moon drifting into the line of fire between two warring planets. A few minutes of new material was cut into the ALIEN ATTACK to push the slightly retconned time period to the 21st century. Of the 4 videos constructed used leftovers from the classic Gerry & Sylvia Anderson production this is the only one I'd really suggest you avoid in favor of watching the shows as they were originally broadcast for syndication in 1975.
- DirectorRay AustinLee H. KatzinStarsMartin LandauBarbara BainBarry MorseEarth's Moon has been ripped from its orbit by a massive nuclear explosion and cast adrift in unknown space. The more than 300 surviving personnel of Moonbase Alpha find that the drifting Moon on which they are situated has become locked on a collision course with the giant planet Astheria and then is pulled into the center of a black hole in space. The intervention of a higher power saves the Alphans from destruction in both instances.JOURNEY THROUGH THE BLACK SUN was a direct-to-video movie assembled using two classic episodes of the briefly popular English science fiction series SPACE: 1999. The season one installments (Collision Course and The Black Sun) produced in 1975 starred Hollywood super-couple Martin HUSBANDS AND WIVES Landeau and Barbara MISSION: IMPOSSILE Bain as Moonbase Commander John Koenig and his love interest Doctor Helena Russell. The couple lead a lunar colony into the uncharted regions of the galaxy after the moon is blown out of earth orbit. Canadian actor Barry THE CHANGLELING Morse co-starred as scientific advisor Victor Bergman. This highly publicized syndicated series was the brainchild of Sylvia & Gerry Anderson who had a string of supermarionation hits including FIREBALL XL5, THUNDERBIRDS and STINGRAY. The lavish budget is on proud display and features some imaginatively designed miniature work from Oscar winning effects artist Brian ALIEN Johnson. Above average.
- DirectorCharles CrichtonPeter MedakStarsMartin LandauBarbara BainCatherine Schell"Space: 1999 (1975)" season 2 episodes "The Metamorph (1976)" and "Space Warp (1976)", edited together to create a movie about the adrift in space crew of Moonbase Alpha that meets shape-shifting alien Maya and her father who wants their brains.COSMIC PRINCESS was a direct-to-video movie using two of the flashier second season episodes of Gerry & Sylvia Anderson's cult classic SPACE: 1999 (The Metamorph and Space Warp) Both featured Catherine THE RETURN OF THE PINK PANTHER Schell as a shape-shifting alien and FLASH GORDON actor Brian Blessed as the ruler of Psychon. Oscar winner Martin ED WOOD Landeau and his Emmy winning wife Barbara THE HARLEM GLOBETROTTERS ON GILLIGAN'S ISLAND Bain starred as commander Koenig and Dr Russell; survivors of a nuclear explosion which catapulted the earth's moon into deep space. The compilation of episodes was given a gentle retcon during the new title sequence promoting this colorful English video as COSMIC PRINCESS. Brian Johnson (ALIENS, THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK, etc) handed the impressive miniatures and fabulous old-school special effects. Retro genre fans will dig it.
- DirectorBarry CraneSidney HayersSigmund Neufeld Jr.StarsKent McCordBarry Van DykeRobyn DouglassThe Battlestar Galactica and its ragtag fleet of ships finally locate Earth, only to discover that the planet is not prepared for the inevitable Cylon invasion.A letter writing campaign forced ABC to reconsider cancelling BATTLESTAR GALACTICA at the end of the 1978-1979 tv season so a revamped version from creator Glen MANIMAL Larson & showrunner Donald TALES OF THE GOLD MONKEY Bellasario was ordered as a midseason replacement. GALACTICA 1980 featured Lorne EARTHQUAKE Greene as Commander Adama who dispatches a pair of warriors (Kent ADAM-12 McCord, Barry DIAGNOSIS: MURDER Van Dyke) to earth to prepare for colonization. The reboot sank immediately to the bottom of the ratings and is widely considered to be one of the worst science fiction series to ever make it to air. This DOG was cobbled together using material from the 3 part series opening Galactica Discovers Earth and footage from the 2 parter The Night the Cylons Landed mostlly. Archival footage featuring John Colicos as the villainous Baltar was cut in to CONQUEST OF THE EARTH to lend it much needed continuity with BATTLESTAR GALACTICA's theatrical cut and MISSION GALACTICA: THE CYLON ATTACK. If you loved the original show do yourself a favor and never watch CONQUEST OF THE EARTH.
- StarsYasuaki KurataKenji UtsumiMakoto AkatsukaDragon and his comic sidekick, Kojiri fight an evil world wide organisation called Shadow.FIGHT! DRAGON was a Japanese adventure series for kids starring genre favorite Yasuki THE FIST OF VENGEANCE Kurata as 'Dragon'. The death-defying kung-fu secret agent and his likable ccmic sidekick (Makota CHALLENGE ME DRAGON Akatsuka) tour the dangerous city streets on the lookout for a gang of assassins who murdered Dragon's mentor. 25 half hour episodes of this outrageously violent children's show were produced for the 1974 season with a ridiculous amount of time spent on drawn knives and shattered bones. On the plus side, although it's nothing fancy the choreographed fights are gracefully presented. Not at all recommended for kids!...but also not bad.
- DirectorChien PengStarsHsiao-Sung LiangYasuaki KurataMakoto AkatsukaLung Yen Fei (Yusuaki Kurata) returns from Japan to investigate the cause of his teachers' death, as he was healthy and his kung fu was fantastic. After some snooping around, Lung Yen Fei finds out that the Black Leopard gang is the cause behind his Sifu's death. An Interpol agent, Leung Kin Sun (Bruce Liang) is also investigating the Black Leopard gang's activities and at times manages to...CHALLENGE ME DRAGON was a movie assembled from a handful of the more brutally violent episodes of the 1974 children's show FIGHT! DRAGON. The action sequences aren't bad as a full length feature but the minimal story elements become lost. Yasuki THE FIST OF VENGEANCE Kurata who was a frequent 'heavy' in the kung-fu genre shines as the heroic Dragon waging a one man war against a cartel of assassins responsible for the death of his mentor. Rather bloodless considering the rapid fire bodycount.
- DirectorMilos FormanStarsJack NicholsonLouise FletcherMichael BerrymanIn the Fall of 1963, a Korean War veteran and criminal pleads insanity and is admitted to a mental institution, where he rallies up the scared patients against the tyrannical nurse.In 1993 ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST was selected for preservation with the National Film Registry by the Library of Congress who found it to be of aesthetic, cultural and historic significance & rightly so. This masterpiece of cinema based on the beloved 1962 novel by Ken Kesey swept the Oscars in the top 5 catagories; Best Picture, Best Director, Best Actor, Best Actress and Best Screenplay becoming the 1st film to so so since 1934's IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT. It wouldn't be until 1991 that THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS duplicated this amazing feat. Oscar Winner Jack THE WITCHES OF EASTWICK Nicholson delivers yet another career defining performance as R.P. McMurphy who has manipulated the criminal justice system into believing him to be insane after the statutory rape of a 15 year old girl. He's sentenced to an asylum in lieu of jailtime where his masculine energy and growing popularity among the more docile inmates threatens the authority of head nurse Ratched. Best Actress Louise EXORCIST II: THE HERETIC Fletcher is the ruthlessly by-the-book caregiver who will tolerate no insubordination from the men on the ward most of whom she intimidates. Bo THE ROSE Goldman & Lawrence Hauben who both recieved statuettes for their brilliant screenplay mined Kesey's book for every dramatic nugget when building the dynamic between McMurphy and Ratched. Their confrontations become white hot as the nonconformist's deliberate attempts to undermine her authority earn him the respect of the other men who are too timid to stand up to her bullying. Best Director Milos AMADEUS Forman gets the most of a stellar supporting cast in addition to his iconic leads. Michael THE HILLS HAVE EYES Berryman, Christopher BACK TO THE FUTURE Lloyd, Scatman THE SHINING Cruthers, Danny BATMAN RETURNS DiVito, Sidney CARRIE Lasick, Will POLTERGEIST II: THE OTHER SIDE Sampson and Best Supporting Actor nominee Brad THE EXORCIST III Dourif resonate with humanity every second they're onscreen together. Despite the intense subject matter ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST never misses an opportunity to make you laugh or think. This is ESSENTIAL viewing for anyone who loves great cinema and it also recieved Academy Award nods for Best Film Score, Best Editing and Best Cinematography. The characters of Ratched and Chief (Sampson) would appear in the hit fantasy series ONCE UPON A TIME while AMERICAN HORROR STORY creator Ryan Murphy re-imagined RATCHED as a lurid, lesbian crime drama for that streaming service I dislike and would never recommend.
- DirectorWes AndersonStarsBill MurrayOwen WilsonAnjelica HustonWith a plan to exact revenge on a legendary shark that killed his partner, oceanographer Steve Zissou (Bill Murray) rallies a crew that includes his estranged wife, a journalist, and a man who may or may not be his son.Wes Anderson has kept critics fawning since RUSHMORE straight on through THE GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL and while I'll agree he shows flashes of brilliance (brazenly swiped from better film-makers Stanley Kubrick, David Lynch etc) he's mostly good at filming actors running in slow motion to catchy 80s pop music and I'm not a fan. That said, I am genuinely fond of this fanciful homage to famed diver Jacques Cousteau which does feature slow-mo & plenty of guitar covers of David Bowie tunes in Portuguese, no less! Anderson's frequent musical composer Mark Mothersbaugh of the kitschy band Devo lent his talent to this charming dramedy as did the director's occasional writing partner Owen LOKI Wilson who co-stars as Ned Plimpton; the bastard son of Steve Zissou meeting his father for the 1st time. Bill GHOSTBUSTERS Murray plays the womanizing oceanic explorer who's embarking on an expedition to kill a sea monster who devoured his best friend. Ned (who is played with a forced southern accent) bonds with his reckless, irresponsible father throughout this marvellous adventure which also features Cate THOR: RAGNOROK Blanchett as the young pilot's love interest and Anjelica THE WITCHES Huston as Zissou's long-suffering ex. Anderson and co-writer Noah MADAGASCAR 3: EUROPE'S MOST WANTED Baumback give their cast plenty to do as they fend off pirates, raid research vessels for supplies and film a documentary about hunting a gigantic, colorful, stop-motion animated shark. Willem SHADOW OF THE VAMPIRE Defoe, Jeff THE FLY Goldblum and Bud HAROLD AND MAUDE Cort also appeared in this genuine cult classic which bombed during it's brief theatrical run against a bloated 50 million dollar budget.
- DirectorClive BarkerStarsAndrew RobinsonClare HigginsAshley LaurenceA woman discovers the newly resurrected, partially formed, body of her brother-in-law and lover. She starts killing for him to revitalize his body and escape the demonic beings that are pursuing him after he escaped their underworld.Best-selling author and occasional film-maker Clive NIGHTBEED Barker directed this tale of sadomasochistic depravity & unholy murder based on his scary novella THE HELLBOUND HEART. It's loaded with nausiating set pieces and sudden shocks (including a terrific jump scare courtesy of Jesus!) from ominous beginning to heart-stopping end. Special effects artist Bob WARLOCK II: THE ARMAGEDDON Keen and his team stole the show with a gruesome litany of monstrocities that will have you squirming in your seat. The story opens with Frank (Sean K-9 AND COMPANY Chapman in human form, Oliver DOCTOR WHO Smith as skinless Frank) summoning a quartet of satanic doms (Doug DOMINATOR Bradley, Gracie Korby, Simon Bamford & Nicolas Vince) to show him a realm where pain is indivisible from sexual extacy. The Cenobites drag Frank to Hell leaving the house to his more level-headed brother Larry (Andrew PUMPKINHEAD II: BLOOD WINGS Robinson) & his frustrated wife Julia (Clair READY PLAYER ONE Higgins). The character of Kirsty who appeared in the 1986 short story was written as a rival for the affection of Julia's husband but plays better in the movie cast as Larry's daughter. The shift in plot allowed Barker to slip in a few creepy incestuous moments with uncle Frank whose hellbound heart is resurrected by a drop of his brother's blood. Frank's flayed body reconstitutes under the attic floorboards when Larry's blood mixes with the semen Frank left behind when Pinhead (Bradley) got his hooks into him. The fleshless monster convinces his equally perverted lover Julia to provide him the skin he needs in exchange for the skin she craves by luring a few lovers to their deaths. Larry seems distressingly oblivious to the mutilations and horror going on under his roof but Kirsty (Ashley WARLOCK III: THE END OF INNOCENCE Laurence) & her young friend Steve (Robert MANNIQUIN 2: ON THE MOVE Hines) suspect Julia's up to no good. Kirsty catches her wicked stepmother turning a bloody trick and inadvertantly steals the Lamarchand Configuration from from her uncle. When Kirsty uses the puzzle box to summon the twisted Cenobites back to our dimension it's a toss up to see who'll make it out alive! Clive Barker's HELLRAISER was a huge success on home video especially and garnered mostly positive reviews. It's a nifty, low budget genre favorite tha has a lot of prodution value on screen and talent behind the scenes. If I have to quibble it's that the last minute or two are embarassingly amatuerish. Christopher BARBARIAN QUEEN II: THE EMPRESS STRIKES BACK Young's opulant score helps salvage the truly awful finale somewhat but it's painfully obvious they just ran out of cash before the ending was complete. There have been 9 sequels to date of which 7 featured Bradley in his iconic role. In 2021 the streaming service Hulu announced a remake with actress Odessa A'Zion cast as Pinhead. Barker wrote a sequel to his short story called THE SCARLET GOSPEL in 2015 and co-authored another novel with Mark Miller in 2018. Fans may be intrigued to learm HELLRAISER: THE TOLL incorporates elements from Barker's 1995 cult hit LORD OF ILLUSIONS. Tony Randel who helped edit HELLRAISER would direct it's not-quite-as-good sequel HELLBOUND: HELLRAISER II.
- DirectorTony RandelStarsDoug BradleyAshley LaurenceClare HigginsKirsty is brought to an institution after the horrible events of Hellraiser (1987), where the occult-obsessive head doctor resurrects Julia and unleashes the Cenobites and their demonic underworld.This very popular sequel to 1987's surprise horror hit features Ashley LURKING DEAR Laurence as Kirsty Cotton locked up and under observation at a psychiatric hospital having survived a satanic massacre earlier in the week. Her doctor (Kenneth SPANISH FLU: THE FORGOTTEN FALLEN Cranham) believes her ravings having sought entrance into the realm of the Cenobites for years. Armed with her fantastic story of reconstituting those who have been taken Dr Channard spills blood on the very mattress Kirsty's stepmother Julia (Clair DOCTOR WHO Higgins) died on. The adulteress serial-killer does return from Hell but requires flesh to mend her wounds. They decide Kirsty's will do! Meanwhile, the depraved couple give a puzzle cube to an autistic child (Imogen THE TRIPODS Boorman) to open a portal to the dimension of the Leviathan. With the walls closing in with unearthly smoke & light our heroine descends into the netherworld of torture where her skinless Uncle Frank (Oliver TALE OF THE VAMPIRE Smith) lays in wait on a burning hot slab. Simon THE HAUNTING OF MARGAM CASTLE Bamford & Nicolas NIGHT BREED Vince return as Chatterer & Butterball as did Doug WRONG TURN 5: BLOODLINES Bradley whose role of Pinhead was significantly expanded. They're all quite fun in make up provided by Graham THE HUNGER Longhorst. Barbie GRIZZLY II: REVENGE Wilde replaced Grace Kirby as the creepy female Cenobite who's thrilled to have Kirsty back within their clutches. Meanwhile Channard has been transformed into a freakish Cenobite surgeon who's eager to start cutting into his autistic patient's brain to see what makes her tick. Clive Barker (who also executive produced) came up with the story but credit for the occasionally fractured screenplay goes to Peter WISHMASTER 4: THE PROPHECY FULFILLED Atkins. Tony AMITYVILLE 1992: IT'S ABOUT TIME Randal keeps the nightmarish imagery flowing at a delirious pace and your eyes popping thanks to some impressively staged matte painting work & visual FX by artists Dennis SUPERGIRL Bartlett & Cliff WARLORDS OF THE DEEP Cullen. Christopher A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET PART 2: FREDDY'S REVENGE Young provided the memorable score as icing on the cake. I rather enjoyed the Lovecraftian flavor of HELLBOUND: HELLRAISER II but wish the characters made more sense and felt less contrived. This would be the last HELLRAISER film distributed by Roger Corman's New World Pictures and the last produced by Barker's company Film Futures which shuttered it's window after the failure of NIGHT BREED. Dimension obtained the rights in time for 1992's HELLRAISER III: HELL ON EARTH.
- DirectorAnthony HickoxStarsTerry FarrellDoug BradleyKevin BernhardtAn investigative reporter must send the newly unbound Pinhead and his legions back to Hell.After New World Pictures filed for bankruptcy an exec named Lawrence Kuppin headed for the greener pastures of the recently launched Dimension films with the sequel rights to a number of properties in his pocket including CHILDREN OF THE CORN II: THE FINAL SACRIFICE, ANGEL IV: UNDERCOVER and HELLRAISER III: HELL ON EARTH. With franchise creator Clive THE MIDNIGHT MEAT TRAIN Barker's name attached as an executive producer the Wienstein's went ahead with promising young director Anthony WAXWORK II: BACK IN TIME Hickox set to film based on a script from Tony GRUNT: THE WRESTLING MOVIE Randel & Peter WISHMASTER 2: EVIL NEVER DIES Atkins. Series regular Ashley HELLRAISER: HELLSEEKER Lawrence as Kirsty Cotton reprised her role in cameo to explain the significance of the Lamarchand Configuration cube to a reporter investigating the sighting of a box at the scene of a violent disturbance at a downtown hot spot. The Menandez brothers-esque nightclub owner (Kevin DYNASTY Bernhardt) acquired the puzzle box (which was later stolen by a street kid) when the asylum which briefly housed Kirsty was shut down. He also bought a pillar containing the imprisoned Cenobite Pinhead. The sadistic demon needs flesh to begin his latest killing spree and cuts a deal with the sexually voracious club owner to transform him into a sex cenobite in exchange for freedom. Pinhead also resquires the box which has already passed hands from a street kid to a reporter (Terry STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE) who's plagued with visions ala A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET. Joey's father was killed in Vietnam and she's been having dreams related to his death connected to a soldier who disappeared after WWI. Doug PUMPKINHEAD III: ASHES TO ASHES Bradley returned as the iconic character who is a slave to the box just as his human half (the perverted WWI vet) is imprisoned in limbo. Both supernatural aspects manipulate Joey through her dreams hoping to exploit her father's memories to obtain the key to the Labyrinth of the Leviathan. The Lamarchand Cube's final resting place will send chills racing up your spine! Bob & Dave Keen worked on both HELLRAISER III: HELL ON EARTH and Barker's far superior CANDYMAN which was in production almost concurrently. The special effects departments contributions are substantial a greatly appreciated. The night club massacre and L.A. rampage alone exceed the grue & gore hound fan expectations. Composer Randy FIRESTARTER 2: REKINDLED Miller took credit for the score but the best bits were recycled from Christopher Young's work on the original 1986 horror classic. Followed by the disastrous HELLRAISER IV: BLOODLINE
- DirectorKevin YagherStarsBruce RamsayValentina VargasDoug BradleyIn the 22nd century, a scientist attempts to right the wrong his ancestor created: the puzzle box that opens the gates of Hell and unleashes Pinhead and his Cenobite legions.HELLRAISER IV: BLOODLINE was initially directed by special effects artist Kevin Yagher who genre addicts know for his contributions to CHILDREN OF THE CORN III: URBAN HARVEST & A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET PART 2: FREDDY'S REVENGE. After a catastrophic falling out with Dimension who ordered significant changes to his 111 minute cut, Yagher quit and Joe THE SKULLS II Chappelle was brought in to film additional scenes & trim the picture down to a less ambitious 82 minutes in length. The drastically truncated version was released to theatres with the directorial credit assigned to the infamous pseudonym Alan Smithee. Peter WISHMASTER 3: BEYOND THE GATES OF HELL Aitins prepped the script which follows 3 generation of the Lamarchand family tormented by demons released via the manipulations of a puzzle box. From the origin of the Lamarchand Configuration in 1796 to to descendants of it's creator facing the threat of the demonic Angelique (Valentina DANGEROUS LIAISONS Varga) & her hellish cenobite companion Pinhead (Doug PUMPKINHEAD III: ASHES TO ASHES Bradley) our fragmented tale unfolds. The 3 generations of the Lamarchand family were all played by the forgettable Bruce DOOMSDAY PROPHECY Ramsay whose final incarnation is the engineer who designed the Elysium Configuration. The Elysium's an orbiting space station launched in the year 2127 to lure the cenobites into a trap which nuetralizes the effects of the Lamarchand cube. The script (which had problems to begin with) was ultimately damaged beyond repair as nearly a half hour of the film was hacked away. Ramel CANDYMAN 2: FAREWELL TO THE FLESH Ravich was brought in to help with uncredited rewrites to no avail. Clive Barker who directed 1987s HELLRAISER served as executive producer. During the late 80s /early 90s several of the aging franchises attempted to refresh their brands with an adventure set in outer space. CRITTERS 4, JASON X & LEPRECHAUN 4: IN SPACE all made the trip with varying degrees of success but HELLRAISER: BLOODLINE was the only one to BOMB. Gary PUMPKINHEAD 4: BLOOD FUED Tennicliffe, Rick GOR II Kerring & Jason THE NUTTY PROFESSOR II: THE KLUMPS Barnett all contributed to the passable special effects. Fans find this hot mess intriguing but the studio insists they trashed the deleted material forever dashing the fanboy dreams of a director's cut. Followed by HELLRAISER: INFERNO.
- DirectorScott DerricksonStarsCraig ShefferNicholas TurturroJames RemarA shady police detective becomes embroiled in a strange world of murder, sadism and madness after being assigned a murder investigation against a madman known only as "The Engineer".Doug PUMPKINHEAD III: ASHES TO ASHES Bradley insists HELLRAISER: INFERNO was based on a spec script gathering dust on the Dimension Studio shelf that was re-written by Paul URBAN LEGENDS 2: FINAL CUT Boardman & director Scott DOCTOR STRANGE Derrickson to include his iconic character Pinhead. After having lost a bundle on HELLRAISER: BLOODLINES the director had to get by on a special effects budget that couldn't even buy a Toyota 4Runner. Clive Barker removed his name from the credits as Executive Producer and the Weinstein's had him barred from the set. Despite the strikes this low budget entry had going against it HELLRAISER: INFERNO succeeds more often than not...barely. Some creepy creature designs from Gary CANDYMAN 3: DAY OF THE DEAD Tunnicliffe & Jamison AMITYVILLE: THE AWAKENING Goei will evoke a shudder or two when briefly glimpsed. The young director focused on the noir-ish supernatural elements about a crooked cop (Craig NIGHTBREED Sheffer) investigating a string of murders committed by a serial killer known as The Engineer. James DJANGO UNCHAINED Remar & Nicolas PAUL BART: MALL COP 2 Turturro co-star as colleges on the force who may know more about the mysterious puzzle box found at the scene of a ritual murder than they're willing to admit. The storyline is so predictable the ending will come as no surprise whatsoever but the actors are sincere. Overall it reminded me of playing the Silent Hill video games that were popular at the time. The cinematographer was Nathan Hope who also worked on the visually striking 2005 flop THE FOG. Followed by HELLRAISER: HELLSEEKER.
- DirectorRick BotaStarsDean WintersAshley LaurenceDoug BradleyAfter a car crash, a shady stockbroker suffers from amnesia. This leaves him in a hazy limbo of sex and murder. But, as in a predestined journey, he unmistakenly takes the bait and follows the marked-out clues all the way to Pinhead.HELLRAISER: HELLSEEKER is the 6th film in the occasionally popular franchise spun off from the 1986 novella The Hellbound Heart and the 1987 film it inspired: HELLRAISER. This was the 2nd film Dimension made based on a script unrelated to the characters created by Clive Barker. Carl THE PROPHECY 3: THE ASCENT Dupre & Tim HELLRAISER: DEADER Day re-wrote the unproduced script to incorporate a few minutes of 'Pinhead action' for director Rick HELLRAISER: HELLWORLD Bota. This Canadian-made, direct-to-video cheapy cast Doug THE PROPHECY: UPRISING Bradley in the role that made him famous but only gave him 5 minutes of screen time. Top-billed Ashley Laurence similarly appears in what's little more than a cameo reprising the part of Kirsty Cotton who last we saw in HELLRAISER III: HELL ON EARTH. The star of this show's the very charismatic Dean TERMINATOR: THE SARAH CONNOR CHRONICLES Winters who plays Kirsty's amnesiac husband Trevor. Ever since Trevor work up in hospital with his wife presumed dead he's been plagued by visions and hounded by police who suspect him of murder. The lackluster visual effects were provided by a number of artists including Kim FREE WILLY 3: THE RESCUE Martensen, Kevin DRACULA II: ASCENTION Van Hook and Bryon CHILDREN OF THE CORN VII: REVELATION Callaghan but none of it will distract you away from the muddled storyline with serious delusions of noir grandeur. You'll figure out the 'surprise' ending about 5 minutes into the movie which was followed by 4 sequels the last of which was 2018s HELLRAISER: JUDGMENT.
- DirectorRick BotaStarsKari WuhrerIonut ChermenskiHugh JorginA journalist uncovers an underground group who can bring back the dead and slowly becomes drawn into their world.Rick HAPPY FACE KILLER Bota directed this Eastern European, direct-to-video sequel back-to-back with HELLRAISER: HELLWORLD to shave production costs. The deadly dull script about a reporter (Kari THE HITCHER II: I'VE BEEN WAITING Wuhrer) investigating a suicide cult leads to it's Jim Jones-like leader; a descendant of the inventor of the Lamarchand puzzle box. Minor horror icon Doug THE PROPHECY: UPRISING Bradley pops up briefly towards the end as Pinhead but you'll probably be too bored by then to care. This occult mystery by writer Neal KRAA!: THE SEA MONSTER Stevens was completely unrelated to the work of HELLRAISER creator Clive Barker. What little there was to exploit a connection was provided by Tim Day who also managed to bugger up Part VIII. Gary PULSE 2: AFTERLIFE Tunnicliffe served up the lion's share of inferior make up effects while Chad CHILDREN OF THE CORN: REVELATION Goei is to blame for the generic CG FX. The least frightening and also the least visually arresting entry in the long-running horror franchise.
- DirectorRick BotaStarsStelian UrianKatheryn WinnickAnna TolputtGamers playing a MMORPG based on the "Hellraiser" films find their lives endangered after being invited to a rave, the host of which intends to show them the truth behind the Cenobite mythos.I'm giving this disappointing 7th sequel to HELLRAISER two stars. One is for the usually reliable Lance PUMPKINHEAD III: ASHES TO ASHES Henriksen and the other's for an unusually strong supporting cast which includes Henry BATMAN V SUPERMAN: DAWN OF JUSTICE Cavill, Katherine VIKINGS Winnick, Khory THE WALKING DEAD Payton, Christopher SLASHER Jacot & franchise regular Doug THE PROPHECY: FORESAKEN Bradley in his final appearance as Pinhead. Rick Bota directed this home-video entry in the series shot back-to-back with HELLRAISER: DEADER in Bulgaria to cut costs. The script was by Carl THE PROPHECY: ASCENT Dupre and Joel THE PROPHECY: UPRISING Scisson based on Scisson's (unpublished?) short story; 'Dark, Can't Breathe'. The story had no connection whatsoever to the Cenobite mythology created by Clive Barker who washed his hands of the wretched thing. A group of young video gaming friends are lured to a mansion by the bitter father (Henriksen) of a boy who killed himself after playing Hellworld. The Host blames his guests for son's death and intends to bury them alive at the asylum designed by Philip Lamarchand; creator of the Lamarchand Configuration puzzle box. Most of this lame story unfolds as a sequence of hallucinations induced by the insane father through narcotics & hypnotic suggestion until the true mastermind is revealed. Bradley (the fans will be furious to learn) was wasted in a brief cameo towards the end credits. The lackluster CG was provided by Jamison FROM DUSK TILL DAWN 3: THE HANGMAN'S DAUGHTER Goei while Gary PUMPKINHEAD 4: BLOOD FEUD Tunnicliffe designed the practical make-up special effects. Followed by the even more desperate HELLRAISER: REVELATIONS in 2011.
- DirectorVíctor GarciaStarsJolene AndersenSteven BrandDan BuranTwo college friends unwittingly release Pinhead and his minions.Gary Tunnicliffe who has worked steadily on the HELLRAISER franchise as a make up technician since 1992's HELLRAISER III: HELL ON EARTH wrote this sloppy bastardization of Clive Barker's provocative cenobite concept for director Victor MIRRORS 2 Garcia. Dimension hadn't made a movie since 2005 and faced losing the rights to the brand unless they produced a sequel. HELLRAISER: REVELATIONS was thrown together on a miniscule budget at the last minute then shown in one theatre for one night before being dumped into dollar-store bins. Iconic actor Doug WRONG TURN 5: BLOODLINES Bradley refused to return to the diminishing franchise and was candid about his disgust for the small salary offered him after years of dedicated service. Unpopular actor Stephen CHASING THE DEVIL Smith Collins was hired to play Pinhead almost universally against the wishes of series cult of admirers. His performance was so poor Fred 'Devil' Tatascoire of Marvel's MOON GIRL AND DEVIL DINOSAUR cartoon had to dub for the actor. Two dysfunctional young men on a tear through Mexico (Nick BEVERLEY HILLS CHIHUAHUA 3: VIVA LA FIESTA! Eversman & Jay MEGA PYTHON VS GATOROID Gillespie)become involved with the murder of prostitutes after the discovery of a Lamarchand puzzle box and vanish from the face of the earth. On the anniversary of their disappearance their families gather to search for clues and closure by examining their last known belongings. When Nico's girlfriend tampers with the cube her missing brother appears with a fantastic tale of how he is being chased by sadomasochistic demons from a hellish dimension. Mike CHILDREN OF THE CORN: RUNAWAY Regan handled the special effects that look like they belong in a mockbuster by The Asylum. Arguably the worst movie in the long-running series but not the last. Up next; HELLRAISER: JUDGMENT
- DirectorGary J. TunnicliffeStarsDamon CarneyRandy WayneAlexandra HarrisDetectives Sean and David Carter are on the case to find a gruesome serial killer terrorizing the city. Joining forces with Detective Christine Egerton, they dig deeper into a spiraling maze of horror that may not be of this world.Gary Tunnicliffe got his start in the biz working as a make-up effects artist on fellow Brit Anthony Hickox's WAXWORK II: LOST IN TIME. The pair reunited for HELLRAISER III: HELL ON EARTH & the effects man has remained with the faded horror franchise since going so far as to write the atrocious HELLRAISER: REVELATIONS before taking the helm of this 10th and worst entry yet! Former Pinhead actor Doug Bradley declined to participate siting Dimension's lousy track record. The studio refused to allow Stephen Smith Collins back following the fan backlash after replacing the oddly beloved actor in 2011. Obscure actor Paul T. Taylor nabbed the lead despite being best known for Kentucky Farms Insurance promotionals. The other returning Cenobite associated with the Order of the Gash is Chatterer played by Mike Regan. He last assumed the role in HELLRAISER: DEADER. The order of the Gash is at war with another bureaucratic division of Hell over the soul of a serial killer who patterns his crimes after the Ten Commandments. Tunnicliffe (who also contributed to the FX) plays The Auditor who oversees the Stygian Inquisition in conflict over the mortal. The unappealing Helena Grace Donald pops up as Jophiel; an angel who orders both factions to release the soul of the murderous police office so that his killings will continue to 'put the fear of God' in the hearts of mortals. That nonsense plays out across a cliched crime procedural with 3 cops (Alexandra SECRET DIARY OF AN AMERICAN CHEERLEADER Harris, Damon THE LONE RANGER Carney, Randy ANDROID COP Wayne) one of whom has something sinister to hide. By hide, I of course mean; 'guess right away'. A lot of this garbage was inspired by Clive Barker's own musings about the bureaucratic aspects of the underworld touched on in 2015s unpopular sequel novel The Scarlet Gospel. This movie steers away from the S&M elements instead offering those willing to fondle the lamarchand cube a shot at Judgement and Redemption. Excuse me?! I was promised a paddling in Eternity by a Satanic Leather-Daddy!! HELLRAISER: JUDGEMENT was another contractual obligation production. Basically either Dimension made a sequel or the rights would be optioned to someone else. Tunnicliffe (who tried 'Go Funding' it himself) finally convinced the desperate studio to cough up about enough money to open a Starbucks. $60,000 of that was earmarked for the special effects from Mike 'Chatterer' Regan, Matthew MY TRUTH: THE RAPE OF THE TWO COREYS Gardocki & Mike RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD 5: RAVE TO THE GRAVE Measimer. In the end this mediocrity sat on the shelf for two years while Bob Weinstein's career was being dismantled by the metoo taliban and then was unceremoniously dumped into home video markets. Not even deceptively top-billed Heather Langenkamp could convince people to watch. Langenkamp who became a scream queen playing Nancy in the A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET series has only 2 minutes of facetime so don't expect much. Streaming service HBO announced a 2022 tv mini-series reboot of the HELLRAISER brand with flavor of the month director David HALLOWEEN KILLS Green signed as show-runner. Meanwhile Hulu is said to be moving forward with a remake starring Odessa A'Zion as Pinhead. Neither can possibly be worse than this!
- DirectorBrian LevantStarsCharles GrodinBonnie HuntDean JonesA slobbering St. Bernard becomes the center of attention for a loving family, but must contend with a dog-napping veterinarian and his henchmen.Ivan GHOSTBUSTERS Reitman produced this family-friendly comedy about a 185 lb St. Bernard taken in as a puppy by the likable Newton clan against the wishes of their grumpy patriarch. John HOME ALONE Hughes wrote the screenplay under the psuedonym Edmond Dantes which is unfortunate as it's one of his best and more profitable films. Amy THE SLUMBER PARTY MASSACRE Holden-Jones contributed to the script for director Brian BEETHOVEN'S BIG BREAK Levant who gets the most out of Chris the dog as BEETHOVAN and frienemy/star Charles ROSEMARY'S BABY Grodin as George Newton. The late, great Grodin is spot on funny and shares a warm raport with castmates Bonnie THE GREEN MILE Hunt as his wife Alice & Sarah KINDERGARTEN COP Karr, Nicholle BEETHOVEN: THE ANIMATED SERIES Tom and Christopher STEP BY STEP Castile as the Newton kids Emily, Ryse and Ted. The antagonists were also perfectly cast with David THE X FILES Duchovney & Patricia THE MIDDLE Heaton as a pair of swindlers as well as Dean THAT DARN CAT Jones as a slimey vet who wants to steal the magnificent animal for scientific experimentation. This shamelessly manipulative adventure is the most fun I've had with a St Bernard pic since CUJO and while I may not have laughed all the way through I sure did smile a lot. Look for Joseph THE DARK KNIGHT RISES Gordon-Levitt in a small role. Like BENJI or LASSIE before him, BEETHOVEN scored a slew of sequels the last of which was 2014s BEETHOVEN'S TREASURE. Highly recommended.
- DirectorRod DanielStarsCharles GrodinBonnie HuntNicholle TomBeethoven, the St. Bernard dog, becomes a father, but his girlfriend Missy is dognapped, and his puppies are in danger of the same fate.Rod TEEN WOLF Daniel directed this slightly adorable/slightly cloying sequel to the box office hit BEETHOVEN which reunites the Newton family (Charles CLIFFORD Grodin, Bonnie JERRY MCGUIRE Hunt, Nicolle THE NANNY Tom, Sarah FATHER OF THE BRIDE Karr & Christopher STEP BY STEP Castile) for another amiable adventure featuring a 185 lb St. Bernard. The passable script was provided by Genie Award winner Len MEATBALLS Blum. The Newton's have a lot on their plate when BEETHOVEN sneaks out of the house one night to go to the movies with a dog named Missy. Missy's owner (Debi THE TUXEDO Mazar as an off brand Cruella De Vil) is horrified when she delivers a litter of pure-bred pups & orders them drowned. Before her lug of a boyfriend (Chris RESERVOIR DOGS Penn) can get them into the burlap sack the Newton kids save the day and bring the 4 rescues home to their flummoxed father. Hilarity is supposed to ensue but polite laughter will have to do as BEETHOVEN'S 2ND wasn't nearly as praise-worthy despite an Oscar nomination for the Dolly Parton/James Ingram duet The Day I Fall In Love. This would be an early starring role for Danny THAT 70'S SHOW Masterton who's promising career was derailed by unsubstantiated accusation of rape and one of the last for veteran character actor Jeff COLOR OF NIGHT Corey who was once exiled from Hollywood for refusing to name names during the infamous era of McCarthyism. Followed by the direct-to-video hit BEETHOVEN'S 3RD.
- DirectorDavid Mickey EvansStarsJudge ReinholdJulia SweeneyJoe PichlerThe Newton family from the first two Beethoven movies is on vacation in Europe, but they do plan to attend a Newton family reunion, and to make sure one of their family members definitely makes it, they ship him to travel to there with George's brother, Richard. Guess which one it was? That's right, Beethoven. He follows Richard and his family as they hit the road to California in a huge, shiny, and expensive RV, equipped with a DVD player. Following them are two bumbling crooks who have hidden some secret codes on a DVD that they figure no one in the world will buy, but someone does: Richard. So now they have a DVD holding top secret information, and the crooks must get it back.BEETHOVEN'S 3RD was the belated home video sequel to Universal's 1992 hit directed by David ACE VENTURA: PET DETECTIVE, JR. Mickey Adams based on a bland script by Jeff DENNIS THE MENACE STRIKES AGAIN Schechter. This poorly cast, kid-friendly pic which finds BEETHOVEN (played by a St. Bernard named CUJO) shipped off to live with a whole other branch of the Newton family (Judge DR. DOOLITTLE: MILLION DOLLAR MUTTS Reinhold as George Newton's brother Richard, his wife Beth; Julia HONEY, I BLEW UP THE KIDS Sweeney & their 2 children played by Michaela Gallo & Joe Pichler). The new Newtons are heading to California on a road trip ala NATIONAL LAMPOON's VACATION while the St. Bernard is left HOME ALONE. Famed writer John Hughes had a hand in both but used the alias Edmond Dantes as if he was trying to distance himself from this material. That Rotten Tomato site I dislike rated BEETHOVEN'S 3RD at 0% but it's not THAT bad! It's not funny either. I found the Newton family unappealing and abrasive; especially Sweeney who drove me away from SNL forever. I was also not fond of the young actor who played the son although I felt bad when I heard he went missing and was presumed dead. The worst casting faux pas was hiring relatively unknown actors Jamie BRAINSCAN Marsh & Mike PAYBACK TIME Ciccolini as the villains of the piece, The camera doesn't love them for a second. The dimwitted pair are after a secret code embedded on disc that's located inside the Newton's RV. Naturally, BEETHOVEN escapes from the kennel to save his new-found friends from the spies. Followed almost immediately by the equally mediocre BEETHOVEN'S 4TH.
- DirectorDavid Mickey EvansStarsJudge ReinholdJulia SweeneyJoe PichlerThe family is pleasantly surprised and puzzled when Beethoven suddenly becomes obedient. Turns out it's a prince and the pauper scenario, with the real Beethoven now living with a pompous rich family.David NATIONAL LAMPOON'S BARELY LEGAL Mickey Evans directed this G-rated comedy about BEETHOVEN'S 4TH adventure while in the care of the unpopular Newtons (Judge NATIONAL LAMPOON'S THANKSGIVING FAMILY REUNION Reinhold as Richard, Julia IT'S PAT! Sweeney as Beth, Michaela BEETHOVEN'S 3RD Gallo as Sara & Joe SHILOH 2: SHILOH SEASON Pichler as Brennan). This would be the final appearance for the quartet who proved unpopular with fans of the franchise. This would also be one of the final screen credits for actor Pichler who vanished without a trace in 2006. Although suicide was suspected no body was ever found. John THE LAND BEFORE TIME XIII: THE WISDOM OF FRIENDS Loy cut us some slack by adding a 2nd family ; the wealthy Sedgewicks (Matt POLICE ACADEMY 6: CITY UNDER SEIGE McCoy as Reginald, his wife Martha; Veanne THE SASQUATCH GANG Cox and their youngest Madison; Kaleigh FUNKY MONKEY Krish). The plot's a rehash of Mark Twain's THE PRINCE AND THE PAUPER casting famed K-9 actor Cujo as identical St Bernards BEETHOVEN and the pampered & well-behaved Michelangelo. The two dogs couldn't be more different but the lame gags are about the same with the sight of Reinhold drinking from a toilet as funny as you can expect. Rotten Eggs gives this fourth movie in the hit children's franchise 0% but it's arguably closer to 3 stars out of 10. RL wife-beater Mark SWAMP THING: THE SERIES Lindsay Chapman plays a scoundrel hoping to extort the Sedgewick's for the return of their beloved Michelangelo but is in store for a little Ransom of Red Chief karma when he gets hold of BEETHOVEN accidentally instead. Followed by the inevitable BEETHOVEN's 5TH.
- DirectorMark GriffithsStarsDave ThomasFaith FordDaveigh ChaseSara Newton and Beethoven spends summer with Freddy Kablinski in Quicksilver, a weird town.Daveigh S.DARKO: A DONNIE DARKO TALE Chase stars as Sara Newton (replacing the unpopular Michelle Gallo) who spends the summer treasure hunting with her 185 pound St. Bernard BEETHOVEN in the town of Quicksilver. While her uncle (Dave GRACE UNDER FIRE Thomas) seems friendly enough there's no end to the kookiness when the town's more eccentric inhabitants (Clint 3 FROM HELL Howard, Katherine SOAP Helmond, John BOSTON LEGAL Larroquette, Kathy SUDDENLY, SUSAN! Griffen, etc). All want in on the G-rated action but only a clever boy (Sammy LENNY: THE WONDER DOG Kahn) may hold the answer to the location of the bank-heisted loot! Mark THE UNAUTHORIZED MELROSE PLACE STORY Griffiths directed this tepid family entertainment from a connect-the-dots screenplay by writing partners Cliff CHARLOTTE'S WEB 2: WILBER'S GREAT ADVENTURE Ruby & Elana THE LAND BEFORE TIME XIV: JOURNEY OF THE BRAVE Lesser. The pleasant cast which also features Tom NEWHART Poston & Faith MURPHY BROWN Ford elevates this direct-to-video offering from Universal somewhat but it's still an unmistakable drop in quality from the original John Hughes hit. The franchise was gently rebooted in 2008 for BEETHOVEN'S BIG BREAK.
- DirectorMike ElliottStarsJonathan SilvermanJennifer FinniganMoises AriasEddie, a struggling animal trainer and single dad suddenly finds himself the personal wrangler for a large and lovable St. Bernard whose fabulous movie "audition" catapults the dog to stardom. However, a trio of unscrupulous ne'er-do-wells have plans to kidnap the famous dog and hold him for ransom.Mike THE SCORPION KING 4: THE QUEST FOR POWER Elliot directed this unassuming reboot from script doctor Derek Rydall & Brian Levant whose biggest credit's for the upcoming POLICE ACADEMY remake. This all new origin story features a lonely boy grieving for his dead mother (Moises THE WIZARDS ON DECK WITH HANNAH MONTANA Arias) who dreams one day of owning a dog. His animal trainer father played by the Charles Grodin-ish Jonathan ROBO-DOG: AIRBORN Silverman isn't as thrilled with the idea even after he meets a pregnant stray named Beethoven. His bosses at the set of a film he's working on (Rhea IN THE DOGHOUSE Pearleman, Eddie THE LAST BOY SCOUT Griffin) decide however to re-write the picture around the 185 lb St Bernard. The previous animal actor was dog-napped and you can be sure the crooks (Joey JERSEY SHORE SHARK ATTACK Fatone, Stephen SCOOBY-DOO! SHAGGY'S SHOWDOWN Tobolowsky & Oscar FRED: THE MOVIE Nunez) will be after the new mom and her pups. Meanwhile the writer has to redesign her screenplay and isn't happy until she begins to fall in love with the sweet-natured widower who is also played by the actress' real-life husband. Jennifer AN AMERICAN DOG STORY Finnigan is rather pleasant as a romantic lead but wouldn't be invited back for the direct sequel BEETHOVAN'S TREASURE TAIL. The background music was pretty good throughout for a change and the opening credit sequence featuring a CG iguana were highlights in this lifeless entry. 2011's non-sequitur BEETHOVAN'S CHRISTMAS ADVENTURE followed although Silverman would reappear for the 2014 franchise finale.
- DirectorJohn PutchStarsJohn CleeseMunro ChambersKim RhodesA Christmas Elf accidentally takes off in Santa's sleigh, crash lands in a small town, and loses the magic toy bag. Beethoven must rescue the Elf, recover the bag from greedy crooks, and return the sleigh to Santa in time to save Christmas.BEETHOVEN hasn't had a speaking voice since the 1994 animated series based on the popular film franchise. Talentless Tom FRED 3: CAMP FRED Arnold lent his regrettably. There's not much of it (The St. Bernard is only capable of human speech if it licks a magical candy held by an elf) but it's devoid of charm. Kyle CORY IN THE HOUSE! Massey played the stranded delivery-elf in one of his last major film roles before unsubstantiated accusations of luring a child over the internet derailed his promising career. Canadian actor Monro DEGRASSI: THE NEXT GENERATION Chambers plays the older boy who helps Santa's friend recover bags of Christmas toys stolen by the villainous Robert MEGA SHARK VS CROCOSAURUS Picardo & his henchman Curtis THE DOG WHO SAVED HALLOWEEN Armstrong. The pair provide just enough ham and cheese while the endlessly engaging John THE PINK PANTHER 2 Cleese provided the narration for this holiday TV movie. Director John THE POSIEDON ADVENTURE Putch may be best remembered to genre fans for his role as Sean Brody in JAWS 3-D. The slight, breezy script was provided by the Altiere brothers (Daniel & Steven) who worked on the direct-to-video hits SCOOBY-DOO! CURSE OF THE LAKE MONSTER and SCOOBY-DOO! LET THE MYSTERY BEGIN!.
- DirectorRon OliverStarsJonathan SilvermanKristy SwansonBretton ManleyBeethoven and his trainer are heading home after a disastrous movie shoot, but end up being stranded in a small coastal town. They help one of the local boys find a lost treasure map and are soon heading off on a new adventure.Canada's Ron PROM NIGHT III: THE LAST KISS Oliver wrote/directed this flat-headed direct-to-video children's pic featuring returning actor Jonathan BEETHOVEN'S BIG BREAK Silverman and K-9 superstar Cujo back for his 8th and worst adventure. The pair are fired from their latest movie by producer Morgan Fairchild looking at 65 like she just slithered off the set of FLAMINGO ROAD. On the ride home, the pair are stranded in the bankrupt town of O'Malley's Cove where lives an adventuresome boy (Bretton HOT AMERICAN SUMMER: TEN YEARS LATER Manley) with an obsession with treasure maps. The toothy tots' mom was the charmless Kristy FLOWERS IN THE ATTIC Swanson who entirely fails to connect with co-star Silverman. Cultish actor Jeffrey BEYOND RE-ANIMATOR Combs overacts shamelessly as a nazi pirate named Fritz Bruchschnauser who intends to steal the secret treasure chest with the aid of his swishy henchman Alec MARLEY & ME Mapa. Udo MEGIDDO: THE OMEGA CODE 2 Kier has a worthless cameo in this well-cast but badly acted FLOP whose 'funniest' joke consists of dog flatulance. Beethoven's fart joke gets told a lot in this joyless special needs romp.
- DirectorSteven SpielbergStarsDarren McGavinSandy DennisRalph BellamyA young couple moves into a farmhouse in rural Pennsylvania. What they don't know is that there is an unseen presence in the house, and that it wants to take possession of the wife.The legendary Steven Spielberg directed this occasionally involving TV movie of demonic possession back in the day while forging his reputation with DUEL and NIGHT GALLERY. It's not his worst film; that's still 1941 but it can be a chore at times even at only 75 mintes. Deaf writer Robert Clouse who's better known for chop-socky hits like BATTLE CREEK BRAWL and ENTER THE DRAGON handled the screenplay for this ROSEMARY'S BABY rip-off which casts Sandy COME BACK TO THE FIVE AND DIME JIMMY DEAN, JIMMY DEAN Dennis and Darren KOLCHACK: THE NIGHT STALKER McGavin as the Wordens who relocate to a farmhouse in Pennsylvania with their infant daughter and son Stevie. The boy was played by FAMILY AFFAIR's Johnny Whitaker. Marjorie senses the supernatural forces attempting to control her son which are frequently depicted by gusts of wind and erratic camera movements. It's not scary in the least but the acting's okay. Ralph ROSEMARY'S BABY Bellamy, Jeff BEETHOVEN'S 2ND Corey and John THE BOYS FROM BRAZIL Rubenstein costarred as did JAWS writer Carl Gotlieb as a guest of the Wordens. If you must see every movie Spielberg directed you may want to have a look but this is lightyears behind POLTERGEIST.
- DirectorRobert ClouseStarsJackie ChanKristine DeBellJosé FerrerA young Asian-American martial artist is forced to participate in a brutal formal street-fighting competition.Jackie Chan who earned his fortune in America with hits like RUSH HOUR and SHANGHAI NOON and recieved an honorary Oscar in 2016 is now a full blown commie with nothing but lollipops & sunshine to say about red China these days but I'm still fond of his work even if he'd never set foot in my home IRL. Bad enough I have to endure communist Prime Minister Trudeau destroying Canada now I've gotta worry about Jackie Chan?! BATTLE CREEK BRAWL (aka: THE BIG BRAWL) was written/directed by deaf film-maker Robert SOMETHING EVIL Clouse hoping to duplicate his success with 1973's kung-fu sensation ENTER THE DRAGON for Hong Kong's Golden Harvest and star Jackie Chan. Those expecting a Bruce Lee calibre performance from Chan as grocier Jerry Kwan will be disappointed. He displays far less grace as a martial artist than we know he's capable of in this tale of gangsters set in 1930s Chicago. The choreographed fight sequences which make up the final act aren't even remotely elaborate and feature mostly professional wrestlers like Lenny BELOW THE BELT Montana and Hard Body THE WRESTLER Haggerty as opponents. Also the charming slapstick routines Chan is known for are only briefly glimpsed and are missed. BATTLE CREEK BRAWL flopped in North America as did Golden Harvest's 1985 pic THE PROTECTOR with the star blaming the failure of both on the inexperience of the directors. Jose DUNE Ferrer plays the mob boss holding Kwan's sister in law hostage in order to force our hero to fight to the death and Oscar nominee Mako appears as the young man's uncle and trainer. Not as bad as you may have heard but nothing you'd ever want to rush out to see either. Meh.
- DirectorGerd OswaldStarsRobert WagnerJeffrey HunterVirginia LeithA ruthless college student resorts to murder in an attempt to marry an heiress.Ira Levin is known for classic thrillers like THE STEPFORD WIVES, THE BOYS FROM BRAZIL and ROSEMARY'S BABY but this; his 1st novel, remains my favorite. It was adapted for the screen 4 times beginning with 1956's A KISS BEFORE DYING which was smartly directed by the very talented Gert BRAINWASHED Oswald based on an adaptation by Lawrence NAKED ALIBI Roman. Virginia Leith (who cinematic masochists such as myself know best from THE BRAIN THAT WOULD NOT DIE) stars as an heiress to a mining empire who's troubled by the death of her sister Dorothy who is believed to have committed suicide. Ellen thinks her twin was murdered because she was pregnant at the time of her death and that her lover may be responsible. Dorothy (Joanne THE 3 FACES OF EVE Woodward) was in fact killed by her boyfriend Bud Corliss because her unplanned baby would cause her stern father Leo Kingship to disinherit her from the family. Robert HART TO HART Wagner makes for a charismatic and chilling psychopath who will kill anyone standing between him and the fortune he stands to inherit including Ellen who Bud has wooed in the months since the 'suicide'. To get to the truth our heroine must retrace her sisters steps while away at school through a tutor unaware of the horror & bloodshed the investigation will trigger. George THE RETURN OF COUNT YORGA Macready played the patriarch of the Kingship dynasty and Hollywood legend Mary THE MALTESE FALCON Aster assumed the role of Bud Corliss' long-suffering mother. Robert COUNT YORGA...VAMPIRE! Quarry has a supporting role as a former classmate of the murdered girl. Highly recommended and in COLOR! Remade internationally as MOONILONNU (1991), BAAZIGAR (1993) and again domestically for the inferior A KISS BEFORE DYING in 1991.
- DirectorJames DeardenStarsMatt DillonSean YoungJames BonfantiA determined student murders his pregnant secret girlfriend and moves onto her twin sister who gradually becomes suspicious of her new lover.Ira ROSEMARY'S BABY Levin wrote the classic mystery/suspense novel A KISS BEFORE DYING in 1953 and it's been filmed 4 times since; in 1956, in 1993 as Bollywood's BAAZIGAR, for 1991's MOONILONNU and for this frequently maligned thriller starring Sean DUNE Young as a pair of wealthy twin heiresses to a copper smelting empire. Young won two Golden Raspberry Awards for her dual role as Dorothy & Ellen Carlsson but she's not bad opposite Oscar nominee Matt TEX Dillon who play a psychotic murderer determined to marry into the Carlsson industrial dynasty. Dillon's a calculating killer but I don't think writer/director James FATAL ATTRACTION Dearden draws enough from the novel to bring him to vivid life. A lot of the content in the book was left out or skimmed over in a superficial manner but under-writing the villain was a mistake. Later, when Ellen begins to investigate an apparent suicide with a cop on the trail of a killer you're going to wish Corliss backstory was more defined. Max EXORCIST II: THE HERETIC Von Sydow, James EXTREMITIES Russo and Diane CARNOSAUR Ladd co-starred in this imperfect noir.
- DirectorYen-Ping ChuStarsJackie ChanBrigitte LinJimmy Wang YuA force of loners and fighters is put together to try and rescue Generals that are captured by the Japanese and save the war effort with the promise of gold and/or pardons of past crimes.Director Yen-Ping MY GEEKY, NERDIE BUDDIES Chu concedes to being a 'movie factory' and not an artist but FANTASY MISSION FORCE (aka: DRAGON COMMANDO, aka: MI NI TE GONG DUI) isn't entirely without artistic merit. It looks like it cost more than it did and features top-billed action superstar Jackie KUNG FU YOGA Chan in a flashy supporting role as a grifter drawn into a dangerous rescue mission (alegedly) set during WWII. The screenplay by Hsin KUNG FU OF 8 DRUNKARDS Wei is all over the place but the Japanese occupation of China circa 1940 isn't really one of of the places you'll be visiting. This surreal and frequently indecipherable adventure owes more to the Marx Brothers than history books. The Chinese military forcibly recruits it's own THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN consisting of a group of catoonishly drawn scoundrels to rescue a trio of generals taken hostage by Nazis. Our heroes; Brigitte POLICE STORY Lin as the bazooka sporting Lily, Jing THE VAMPIRE DOMINATOR Fang as General, Yueh FIST OF FURY II Sun as Old Sun, Ling WOLF DEVIL WOMAN Chang as Chan's girlfriend Emily, singer Frankie A GOOD MAN CAN BEND Cao as Greased Lightning and David THE WOMEN SOLDIERS Tao as Billy face the treat of Amazon cannibals, haunted lands filled with traditional Chinese hopping vampires and even firing squads of soldiers in a MAD MAX-ish junkyard of 80s muscle cars. With all that going on you won't be bored so much as mildly perplexed and maybe even a little amused at how silly it got after the opening credits. I had some fun with it although the sight of Mr. Chan mowing down Nazis to the tune of Yankee Doodle Dandy's a hard sell these days. Co-star Tao also provided the slick pics musical score which steals from CARRIE, THE PLANET OF THE APES, HALLOWEEN and anything else not nailed down. Slightly above average in spite of itself.
- DirectorChester Wong Chung-GwongStarsChung KwanYi-Chan LuChien-Ping LiJohn and Sandy go in search of the missing members of a mercenary crew.As a masochistic gay videophile I usually only watch repeats of DOWNTOWN ABBEY yet in one night for this mundo obscure review blog I've watched (sorta') the same movie twice! FIRE DRAGON is a made in Taiwan (Yes, that means cheap) action movie which incorporates much of the footage from the cultish Hong Kong hit FANTASY MISSION FORCE to give itself some star power and production value. Communist action movie superstar Jackie Chan (who was recognized by his Hollywood peers with an honorary oscar in 2016) recieved top billing cast as Sammy/Arnold in both yet is merely a supporting player with minimal screen time so don't get your hopes up. FIRE DRAGON stars Chung CHINESE SUPERIOR KUNG FU Kwan as secret agent assigned to track down a Nazi (Hung-Lieh SWEET AND SOUR COPS PART II Chen) and his rapey Japanese ally (Ti HONG KONG EMANNUELLE Chin). John is joined by Yi-Chan BRAVE COMMANDO Lu who was raped after the Nazis murdered her father. The inferior and mismatched new footage was thrown together by one-time writer/director Wong Chung-Gwan while the jarringly different scenes featured in FANTASY MISSION FORCE were filmed by Yen-Ping Chu. The distracting soundtrack was stolen from a number of better movies including ZOMBIE, THE HOWLING, PSYCHO, ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK etc. Quentin Tarentino pulls the same trick but his evocative homages hit different.
- DirectorMu ChuStarsCharlie ChinQiu YuenBetty Pei TiHo Mei Fong is a young woman in trouble, running from a gang of criminals with something of importance hidden in her purse. She dies in Chien Chen's taxi while trying to escape, but not before hiding the purse. Chien Chen is now involved whether he likes it or not, along with Ho Mei's sister, who turns out to be an undercover Hong Kong policewoman. They must solve the mystery of the missing purse and what it contained, while being pursued by the criminals and their hired thugs (led by Jackie Chan).Martial arts expert/actress Ho THE HEROINE Wai Ma made an impressive debut in her 1st starring role as POLICE WOMAN. She's on the trail of her sister's killers with the help of a cab driver (Charlie LOVE OF THE WHITE SNAKE Chin) who was the last to see the cops' drug-mule sibling alive. The dying girl hid incriminating evidence in his car that could send a narcotics dealer (Wen MAGNIFICENT BODYGUARDS Tai Li) to prison so the driver is soon also marked for death. Chin (who's not nearly as good an actor or fighter as Ho) took top billing when this forgettable beat-em-up washed up on on Blockbuster shores under the title; THE YOUNG TIGER. The gangster dispatches a car-bombing assassin played by a young Jackie BURN HOLLYWOOD BURN: AN ALAN SMITHEE FILM Chan to kill the meddlers and to find the photos. When POLICE WOMAN was re-released to home video on DVD top billing went to Chan and the title was changed again to RUMBLE IN HONG KONG to capitalize on his 1995s hit RUMBLE IN THE BRONX. Chan's performance is among his least impressive. Not only does he not have a lot of screen time writer/director Mu NOT AFRAID TO DIE Chu fails entirely to capture the beauty and physicality of his work. Close but no cigar for this bloodless, cab-fu caper.
- DirectorChi-Hwa ChenStarsSiu-Hung LeungKar-Yung LauShi-Kwan YenLooking to avenge his father's death, after he was murdered by gangsters when he failed to pay protection money, a monastery novice strives tirelessly, with the help of students and a drunkard, to learn advanced kung-fu techniques.JACKIE CHAN AND THE 36 CRAZY FISTS (as it's sometimes known because deceptive distributors wanted to exploit the martial artist's superstardom) has nothing to do with him specifically. The elite communist spokesperson for red China who teaches at the Wuhan Institute appears very briefly in a cameo. His major contribution to this public domain title was the frequently thrilling but inconsistantly choreographed fight sequences which are the only reason to watch. The real star of the show's Siu-Hung BLACK BELT JONES 2: THE TATTOO CONNECTION Leung cast as a weakling left orphaned along with his sister (played by Michelle WE'RE GOING TO EAT YOU Yim). To have his revenge for their father's murder he joins a monestary to learn fighting skills and discipline. Unfortunately he's then thrust into a new conflict involving a rival academy in league with the killers. Everything about this DRUNKEN MASTER rip-off stinks except (most) of the dazzling hand to hand, foot to head combat. The acting is cringingly bad and the dialogue On MR. FUNNYBONE STRIKES AGAIN Szelo wrote for the veteran cast is worse. Seasoned performers like Cheng DRAGON LEE AND THE FIVE BROTHERS Chaing, Feng THE MIGHTY PEKING MAN Ku and Wen-Tai RUMBLE IN HONG KONG Li all look like fools hamming it up shamelessly for director Chi-Hwa HALF A LOAF OF KUNG FU Chen who is capable of much better. The soundtrack's also wretched except for the tracks stolen from Pino Donaggio's score for CARRIE.
- DirectorMu ChuHai-Feng WeiStarsJackie ChanSiu-Tin YuenHung-Lieh ChenA old beggar from the woods secretly teaches Chien Fu kung fu as he can't afford regular classes and his "dad" doesn't want him fighting. He grows up, works as waiter and ends up fighting men from his town's crime syndicate.After the infamous Cannon Films closed shop Neanderthal producer Menahem Golan took control of distributer 21st Century Films. They released TEN FINGERS OF DEATH in 1979 although the movie itself was mostly filmed back in 1971 under the title CUB TIGER OF KWANG TUNG. By the time it was hit theatres in 1973 it's name was changed again to SNAKE FIST FIGHTER. The movie was the 1st starring role for a 17 year old Jackie AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 DAYS Chan who plays a waiter whose family is being terrorized by a gang shaking down businesses for protection money. As a boy with an interest in the martial arts Jackie was frustrated by his father's refusal to allow him to fight but was eventually taught by a crusty Chinese vagrant wonderfully played by Sui-Tin THE OLD MASTER Yuan. Under the tutelage of Grandmaster Pai-Cheng Tien Jackie hones his skills and is more than capable of defending the village from Big Boss and his goons but is bound by family honor to remain a pacifist. The gangster who eventually burns down Jackie's home killing his father was played by the legendary martial arts master Kwan Young Moon who has trained A-listers like Sylvester Stallone and Mohammad Ali. With his father dead our agile hero is free to seek vengeance. The cast is great unfortunately the film wasn't much to look at. Very low budget and flatly directed by Mu RUMBLE IN HONG KONG Chu & Hai-Feng YOUNG HERO OF SHAOLIN II Wei and poorly scripted by Sun THE OWL Lui. By the end of the decade Chan had become a sensation for his fantastic work in Asian cinema and 21st Century Films hoped to capitalize on his growing fame by re-releasing an altered version which incorporated an all new finale with a body double standing in for Chan who wears a hood to conceal his identity. The re-written script called for Big Boss and Jackie to fight to the death with the character blindfolded. Coincidentally, in 1983 Moon would face a body double filling in for Chan during the conclusion of FEARLESS HYENA II. MASTER WITH CRACKED FINGERS (aka; TEN FINGERS OF DEATH) is a slight improvement over the 1971 cut but they're both a bit of a novelty. Dick FRANKENSTEIN'S CASTLE OF FREAKS Randall served as producer for the 1979 edition.
- DirectorMario CaianoStarsChen LeeKlaus KinskiCarla RomanelliA Chinese immigrant, recently arrived in America, fights to free Mexican slaves from their cruel master.THE FIGHTING FIST OF SHANGHAI JOE is a spaghetti western/chop-sockey hybrid distributed by Toho and Trans World International under the direction of the fondly remembered Mario NIGHTMARE CASTLE Caiano. Caiano (who also wrote the irratic script with 1st timer Fabrizio Trifone Trecca & Carlo NOSFERATU IN VENICE Alberto Alfieri) made scores of B movies mostly for the spaghetti western and sword and sandal genre and THE FIGHTING FIST OF SHANGHAI JOE is one of his best and most bizarre. The film starred the obscure Chen THE THREE MUSKETEERS OF THE WEST Lee as SHANGHAI JOE; a Chinese migrant looking to start a new life in Texas following his graduation from the mystical order of the fire lotus. Only 2 men have recieved the blessing of the fire lotus and both have been imbued with superhuman fighting skills and are said to be nearly invincible. Upon his arrival Joe is confronted with racism and corruption while trying to forge a life for himself in the saddle. I liked the actor who played Joe and the actor who dubbed him (Charles THE BLACK GESTAPO Howerton) but his ability as a martial artist is questionable. Joe is soon marked for death after crossing a wealthy rancher who tortures and murders Mexican slaves for fun. Four assassins are sent to kill the uppity immigrant including a sadist who scalps victims so his dead baby will have something pretty to wear and a brute named; Pedro the cannibal! Klaus NOSFERATU THE VAMPIRE Kinsky & Robert GOLIATH AND THE DRAGON Hundra were joined by Giacomo THE NIGHT EVELYN CAME OUT OF THE GRAVE Rossi Stuart and Gordon FRANKENSTEIN'S CASTLE OF FREAKS Mitchell as the quartet of hired killers. The slaver (Pierro NAZI LOVE CAMP 27 Ulli) has an ace up his sleave should our unshaken hero survive...the only other recipiant of the fire lotus blessing is on his way to collect the bounty. There's a wildly inconsistant vibe at play due to the episodic structure of the movie. The violence is occasionally sickening and always excessive and the racism is wildly over-emphasized (just like it is in the new millennium) while other scenes are awkwardly comical. Most of it worked for me (especially the Sergio Leone inspired soundtrack) although it's hard to recommend as an entertainment. I will say this; You won't be bored for a second. This minor cult classic was sequeled by 1975s THE RETURN OF SHANGHAI JOE.
- DirectorBitto AlbertiniStarsKlaus KinskiCheen LieTommy PolgárA sinister town boss called Pat Barnes has exploited almost everyone in the town. If they don't succumb to his demands they normally end up dead. Barnes is finally brought down by Shanghai Joe and a smooth-talking snake-oil salesman.Chen Lee was unavailable for this sequel to the 1973s cultish MY NAME IS SHANGHAI JOE so producers hired sound-alike Cheen Lie for THE RETURN OF SHANGHAI JOE as his replacement and he's lousy as is most of the inexperienced supporting cast. The contovercial & brilliant Klaus DRACULA Kinski's back but not as the psychotic hired killer with a creepy scalp fetish. This time he plays a despot terrorizing the citizens of the American west which is unfortunate as he was vastly superior as Scalper Jack. Joe (now an undercover federal agent) joins forces with a grifter (Tommy MY NAME IS NOBODY Polgar) to storm Barnes compound. This later entry in the spaghetti western genre might have worked were it not saturated with lame BLAZING SADDLES-style gags courtesy of writers Mario ADIOS, AMIGO Caiano & Carlo NOSFERATU IN VENICE Alberto working closely with hack director Bitto ESCAPE FROM GALAXY 3 Albertini. Karin Fields fails to make a good impression as SHANGHAI JOE's love interest but fared better opposite Kinski for WEB OF THE SPIDER. Dissapointing and forgettable. This German/Italian co-production saw European release as CHE BOTTE RAGAZZI!
- DirectorMu ChuStarsChing WongQiu YuenYang KaoHistorical movie, set during the Japanese occupation of China during WWII, in which a group of Chinese rebels tries to oust the Japanese forces from a small town. Jackie Chan is one of the good guys but has nothing much more than a supporting role.During the 1930s and throughout WWII the Japanese invaded China. Their wealth and liberties were taken away by the invaders who made slaves of the Chinese. Their children were re-educated by teachers forced to comply. The male population were demeaned and humiliated by their cruel masters by compelling them into non-traditional, immasculated roles in a society under constant threat. Meanwhile the easily intimidated & corrupt civic leaders became complict in aiding the facists. Opposition was crushed by the Japanese who stripped the population of their firearms and controlled the press and populace with the same kind of Tienanmen Square dancing many of us in the world of the 21st millennium are seeing at our doorsteps. Ching YOUNG HERO OF SHAOLIN Wong plays a man NOT AFRAID TO DIE (aka: EAGLE SHADOW FIST, aka: DING TIAN LI DI) in the face of impossible odds. He's a simple peasant who will not be subjugated or beaten into submission. His defiance of the Japanese leads to a bloody confrontation with the lives of a sickly man & his family at stake. The lovely and talented Qui LOOKING FOR JACKIE Yuen co-stars as the damsel in distress. Top-billed Jackie THE FEARLESS HYENA Chan appears as a minor character affiliated with the resistance movement but I didn't find his performance the least bit convincing. NOT AFRAID TO DIE is a grim study in oppression and genocidal enslavement that you may not want to watch but could probably learn something from. The fanciful ballet of matial artistry which the people are paying to see simply isn't there as children are butched, women exploited and the innocent are whipped like animals, imprisoned or executed. Len THE GIRLIE BAR Shu wrote the screenplay for director Mu SNAKE SHADOW LLAMA FIST Chu who also cast himself as a main protagonist. Average for it's type but tedious at times.
- DirectorLuis LlosaStarsTom BerengerBilly ZaneJ.T. WalshA veteran US Marine sniper is partnered with a rookie sniper as his spotter to take out a politician and a rebel leader in the jungles of Panama.I'm lucky enough to count a retired sniper as one of my favorite older friends. He's a true hero who deserves to be held in the highest regard. Over coffee you could learn how to rig a vehicle to explode or effeciently snap a leg in about 3 seconds flat so I was mildly disapointed at how sloppy SNIPER was in technical terms and especially at how badly the characters were drawn. Oscar nominee Tom PLATOON Berenger plays a hard-ass combat specialist operating in Panama who is forced to accept an unseasoned spotter to help assassinnate drug-dealers holed up in the jungle. Tom's partner is played by the usually reliable Billy THE SCORPION KING 3: THE BATTLE FOR REDEMPTION Zane who I grew to detest halfway through this frequently absorbing but flawed action movie. SNIPER was marketed overseas as a psychological thriller emphasizing the tension between the leads whereas for American distribution it was sold as a traditional adventure complete with a stolen soundtrack from TERMINATOR 2: JUDGEMENT DAY. Gary THE ISLAND OF DR. MOREAU Chang actually composed an original score but T2 creeps in once or twice. In addition to unbelievable heroes the main villain is a sadistic torturer who likes to chop off trigger fingers while extracting intel. Wasn't impressed by Ken THE ADVENTURES OF PRISCILLA: QUEEN OF THE DESERT Radley as 'The Surgeon' or much of anything really. It's a gorgeous movie thanks to Academy award winning cinematographer Bill ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST Butler but you won't believe you're in Panama anymore than you'll buy the screenplay by Michael Frost Beckner & Crash Layland. Beckner was resposible for the biggest action movie BOMB of all time; CUTTHROAT ISLAND and director Luis Llosa is a Golden Raspberry nominee for ANACONDA. SNIPER was belatedly sequeled 7 times! Berenger returned four times and Zane twice but they didn't share the screen again until 2017's direct-to-video SNIPER: ULTIMATE KILL.
- DirectorCraig R. BaxleyStarsTom BerengerBokeem WoodbineErika MarozsánSgt. Beckett's last mission sends him to a remote war-torn wasteland between Eastern Europe and Asia to assassinate a repressive terrorist leader. Once the job is done, Beckett and his spotter find escaping more difficult than anticipated.Oscar winning actor Tom THE GINGERBREAD MAN Berenger returned for this unexpected TV movie sequel to his minor 1993 hit; SNIPER. Beckett is lured out of retirement by a shifty CIA agent (Dan FRASIER Butler) who requires the legendary marksman to assassinate a terrorist in the destabilized war-torn Muslim stronghold of Serbia. His assigned spotter is played by Bokeem SPIDER-MAN: HOMECOMING Woodbine filling the void left when Billy Zane declined to participitate. The younger Cole was scheduled for execution but offered a pardon ala THE DIRTY DOZEN if he agrees to the accept what is clearly a suicide mission. The chemistry between the leads is less forced and Beckett's character has been toned down & warmed up considerably. Writers Ron Mita & Jan McClain (both best known for S.W.A.T.) loaded SNIPER 2 with palitable action movie cliches for director Crraig THE GINGERBREAD GIRL Baxley who makes the most of his 5 million dollar budget. Of the large Hungarian cast and crew I liked Erika Marozasan best as a resistance fighter. Conversely, the casting of Can Togay as the rogue general left the movie without a proper villain. There's enough pyrotecnics & squib pops to keep you reasonably entertained while waiting for SNIPER 3.
- DirectorP.J. PesceStarsTom BerengerByron MannJohn DomanDeadly sniper Tom Beckett is recruited by the CIA to go to Ho Chi Minh City and take out a ruthless drug dealer who turns out to be an old war buddy he thought was dead.Director P.J. SMOKIN' ACES 2: ASSASSINS BALL Pesce studied his craft under Brian de Palma and recieved an 'F' although his work on this direct-to-video sequel's closer to a C-. His action sequences are glossy, gracefully staged and backed up with a cheesy techo score and proper cinematography. He also manages his large Thaiwanese cast & crew with skill. The stuntwork & digital elements are solidly produced and the tried-and-true stock cliches trotted out by writers Ross PREDATOR MAN Halford & J.S. ALIEN HUNTER Cardone are salvaged by the capable leads. Tom IMPACT EARTH Berenger is back as a past-his-prime marine SNIPER named Beckett dispatched to Ho Chi Mihn City to assassinate the soldier who once saved his life during the Vietnam war. Naturally the NSA official (Denis ANACONDAS: THE HUNT FOR THE BLOOD ORCHID Arnolt) has ulterior motives for assigning Beckett the mission but he's more concerned with his personal demons (alcoholism, nerve damage, etc) to figure out the conspiracy at play. His target (John GOTHAM Dorman) is a drug dealing terrorist and his back up's a Ho Chi Mihn cop (Brian ARROW Mann) secretly working as an American spy. My only quibble's that at 55 the portly Berenger's stretching it a bit as a combat marine. For low budget action fare you'll get enough bang for your buck. Followed by SNIPER: RELOADED in 2011.
- DirectorClaudio FähStarsChad Michael CollinsRichard SammelAnnabel WrightThe son of a renowned sniper decides to track down the sniper who ambushed his squad when they were sent to rescue a white planter in the Congo.Claudio HOLLOW MAN 2 Faeh ruined this installment of the long-running SNIPER franchise which rehashes the exact same generic formula we've seen 3 times before. The big difference is our story unfolds within the framework of a tedious court martial involving the son of Thomas Beckett. Tom Berenger passed the torch to flavorless, hot Chad LAKE PLACID 2 Michael Collins as a soldier sent into the Congo on a suicide mission by a commanding officer with a secret agenda. His squad is picked off by a sniping assassin trained by Billy LEPRECHAUN'S REVENGE Zane reprising the character of Miller. The actor and the role are only similar to what we remember from nearly 2 decades before and not much of an improvement. Love the actor in almost everything but it's a lousy part thanks in part to writers John MEGIDDO: THE OMEGA CODE 2 Fasamo & Ross SINGLE WHITE FEMALE 2: THE PSYCHO Halford. Their screenplay allows for a little more gore and nudity but has about as much depth as an episode of MATLOCK. Top billed Annabel LAKE PLACID VS ANACONDA Wright as Beckett's commanding officer flashes her tits on cue like a prostitute further underrmining what little cred this direct-to-video sequel has going for it. Richard THE STRAIN Sammel & Justin PLANET OF THE APE-MEN: BATTLE FOR EARTH Strydom round out the defeated cast as under-written villains. Followed by SNIPER: LEGACY.
- DirectorDon Michael PaulStarsTom BerengerChad Michael CollinsDoug AllenA rogue assassin is taking out military leaders, and Brandon gets word that his father is one. He tries to track down the killer, finds out that his father isn't dead and realizes that his superior officers are using him as bait to track the killer.Don Michael Paul has a respectable track record directing B-movie sequels for a number of franchises including DEATH RACE, THE SCORPION KING, LAKE PLACID and TREMORS. You can feel confident he won't damage the brand and functions well on a tight budget; especially handling substandard CG. Our story opens with a rogue sniper named Simpson (Doug EASTENDERS Allen) assassinating the high ranking officials he blames for mishandling his mission to Afganistan then abandoning him there to die without extradition support. Simpson's so skilled many suspect the killings are the work of fabled combat marine Thomas Beckett who's been missing in action and presumed dead since he last appeared in SNIPER 3. Top-billed Tom TURBULENCE 2: FEAR OF FLYING Berenger returns having been lured out of hiding to clear his name. Meanwhile Beckett's son (Chad THE CHRISTMAS CARD Micheal Allen) has been recruitred by his military mentor to hunt down the killer even IF it's really his father who's responsible. British stage actor Dominic THE CLINIC Mafam is okay as Brandon's commanding officer and would come back for SNIPER: GHOST SHOOTER as a different character. Collins grew some stubble and has improved considerably since his lackluster debut in SNIPER: RELOADED. The female marine (Mercedes 666 PARK AVENUE Mason) has a worthless subplot that'll kill 10 minutes of your time but the real star of the show turns out to be Berenger who effortless steals what few scenes he's got. He shares an onscreen reunion with former MAJOR LEAGUE franchise co-star Dennis Haysbart, owns the finale and channels Marlon Brando most of the time. The overweight, 65 year old actor draped in camo, scarves and a big floppy hat reminded me a lot of THE ISLAND OF DR. MOREAU in a good way. Indescriminant action movie fans won't hate it but it's undermined by choreographer Martin THE CAR 2 : THE ROAD TO REVENGE Chichov 's tendancy to clutter his shots. He also worked on the tacky-looking DOOM: ANNIHILATION and I'm taking a star off this otherwise passable thriller because it looks like it was shot in a Bulgarian parking lot.
- DirectorDon Michael PaulStarsChad Michael CollinsBilly ZaneDennis HaysbertSnipers ordered to protect a gas pipeline from terrorists suspect a security breach when they're targeted by a ghost shooter who knows their location.SNIPER: GHOST SHOOTER cost a fraction of what the original did almost 3 decades ago. The from poverty budget and a shortfall of talent across every stage of development sank this instantly forgotten sequel. Don KINTERGARTEN COP 2 Michael Paul is a capable, workman-like director who I don't dislike but the screenplay keeps the large, eastern European cast trekking across dreary terrain and yakking monotonously in obeyance of the drastic budgetary limitations. Billy ZOOLANDER 2 Zane phones in his 3rd performance as Miller without his usual nuances and quirks. Tom Berenger as Beckett is absent leaving handsome Chad LOVE'S CHRISTMAS JOURNEY Michael Collins as his wholly inadequate substitute. Seriously, I would rather stare at the creases in Tom Berenger's shoes than watch Chad Collins act. He's also got nothing to do except dodge the occasional bullet of a sniper (Vlad THOR: HAMMER OF THE GODS Velov) while trying to figure out who's feeding the assassin his co-ordinates. You'll have no trouble identifying the culprit but you know Chad. This is going to take a while! The tinny, annoying score by Frederik THE CAR 2: THE ROAD TO REVENGE Wiedmann sounded like the cheesy stuff they use on reality TV. The lousy cinematography was by Martin SHARKNADO 5: GLOBAL SWARMING Chichov as if you couldn't tell from the stench. Frequently, Paul will cut away from Chichov's work to pad this dud with stock footage and you'll spot the difference immediately every time. The main gunfights scattered predictably at half hour intervals didn't generate much work for the small special FX crew (Trayan DOOM: ANNIHILATION Brankov, Katherine ROBOSHARK Walker, etc.) and of the unknown-heavy cast Dennis FRED 2 Haysbert is about as recognisable as it gets. I didn't expect much from writer Chris HOMEWARD BOUND II: LOST IN SAN FRANCISCO Hauty going in but it's clear the deck was stacked against him. This is baby steps above what you'd expect renting an Asylum mockbuster. & Sony should be a bit ashamed distributing something of this low calibre. SNIPER: ULTIMATE KILL followed in 2017.
- DirectorWilliam CastleStarsAnn SavageTom NealGlenda FarrellA San Francisco songbird comes to Alaska and turns the town of Totem Pole and a scheming saloon owner's life upside down. Then a rival saloon owner wants a piece of the action.William HOMICIDAL Castle was a talented director almost of the magnitude of Roger Corman who craved the fame & critical acclaim of Alfred Hitchcock. Thanks to some innovative marketing concepts used to promote his later films to some extent he succeeded and remains an iconic figure to his cult of admirers. This was his 4th movie which cast femme fatale Ann AFTER MIDNIGHT WITH BOSTON BLACKIE Savage in the role of KLONDYKE KATE based on a short story (The Life of Kate Rockwell Matson) by William Pierce who also served as producer. The adaptation was by writers M. Coates MONTANA BELLE Webster & Houston BELLE OF THE YUKON Branch. KLONDYKE KATE who was the lover of theater mogul Alexander Pantages personally selected the up-and-coming Savage to play her in what would be her 1st starring role opposite Tom THE BRUTE MAN Neal. Neal (a convicted murderer in real life who served 6 years for shooting his wife) plays a saloon owner in Alaska falsely accused of murder. Columbia's Queen of the B's Constance BOSTON BLACKIE GOES HOLLYWOOD Worth plays a bitter showgirl who may know more about the crime than she'd ever admit. Producer Pierce's wife sued Worth in court for alienating the affections of her husband. This B&W western-flavored noir has a surprising amount of production value and while not a hit Savage & Neal would reunite on screen numerous times including for the classic thriller DETOUR. 65 mins.
- DirectorWilliam CastleStarsJohn HodiakRobert StackJoy PageA cavalry officer tries to keep a lid on a volatile situation when Indian leader Cochise is being prodded into starting a war.Former Monogram front man Sam Katzman produced this technicolor B-movie western with frequent collaborator director William THE CRIME DOCTOR'S WARNING Castle. Robert BEAVIS AND BUTTHEAD DO AMERICA Stack plays an officer of the United States Regiment of Dragoons who is sent to negotiate peace between the Apache, Comanche and Mexicans feuding over the Arizona land purchase of 1853. Major Burke finds an ally in the Apache Chief Cochise but there are dangerous men who will stop at nothing to instigate war. Robert I WAS A TEENAGE WEREWOLF Griffin plays an arms dealer who profiteers from the ongoing violence while his brother Felipe (Rico THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN Alaniz) has a personal score to settle with Cochise (John AMBUSH AT TOMAHAWK GAP Hudiak). Joy FIGHTER ATTACK Page is a bland actress cast as Stack's love interest in this overly-talkie drama which plays fast and loose with historic accuracy. The last 15 minutes are surprisingly intense in contrast to the rest of this passable time-waster.
- DirectorWilliam CastleStarsBrett KingBarbara LawrenceJames GriffithThe son of Jesse James joins up with the notorious Dalton gang.The huge success of 1953s HOUSE OF WAX left studios scrambling to crank out their own 3-D pics and no one did it faster or with such efficiency than the iconic William Castle...especially on a miniscule budget JESSIE JAMES VS THE DALTONS was the 2nd of 3 westerns Castle shot in the 1950s for Columbia Pictures in the 3-D format. The others were FORT TI (1953) & DRUMS OF TAHITI (1954). Robert TWICE-TOLD TALES Kent and Samuel THE GIANT CLAW Newman wrote this wildly inaccurate 'true story' of the American west. In case you were wondering Jesse James does not appear in this technicolor cult classic. Brett A YANK IN KOREA King was cast as a young man named Brand who thinks he's the bastard son of the notorious outlaw. To uncover the truth he must 1st rescue a lovely gal named Kate Manning (Barbara KRONOS Lawence) who's been sentenced to death. She knew James personally & may know of his whereabouts. The infamous Dalton gang led by James THE LAW VS BILLY THE KID Griffen wants to get his hands on Manning to locate a fortune in stolen loot. All will be revealed when Bob Ford (Rory KILLER APE Mallinson) rides into Coffyville, Kansas. The 3-D effects are well-integrated with the briskly paced script which clocks in at only 65 minutes. Castle enthusiasts will appreciate this sadly obscure B adventure more than most.
- DirectorWilliam CastleStarsGeorge MontgomeryRichard DenningMartha HyerIn Oregon, the Army is ordered to negotiate peace with the Indians but unscrupulous businessmen, who profiteered during the conflict, secretly sabotage the peace process.Stoic George DJANGO: THE HONORABLE KILLER Montgomery stars as a no-nonsense major dispatched to settle a dispute with the Native community using only peace and diplomacy. Someone at the fort wishes to sabotage the treaty negotiations. This reasonably engaging mystery set in the old west co-starred Emory MA AND PA KETTLE BACK ON THE FARM Purnell & Martha FRANCIS IN THE NAVY Hyer as a suspicious couple. Soldiers played by Richard CREATURE WITH THE ATOMIC BRAIN Denning & John ZOMBIES OF THE STRATOSPHERE Crawford may also have something to hide. This time-killing western drama was written by Douglas DRUMS OF TAHITI Heyes for cultish B-movie director William STRAIGHT-JACKET Castle.
- DirectorWilliam CastleStarsDennis MorganPatricia MedinaWilliam TalmanA love triangle tears apart two partners prospecting for uranium in Colorado.Alfred Hitchcock was the Master of Suspense. Rival William Castle was The Master of Self Promotion. Beginning in 1958 the steadily employed B-movie auteur would embark on the cult classic MACABRE paid for with a mortgage on his house. The movie was a hit thanks to a brilliant marketing campaign wherein patrons were offered life insurance policies should they happen to die of fright. His transition to the horror genre cumulated in an executive producer credit for ROSEMARY'S BABY which offered validation to his talent as a world-class film-maker. URANIUM BOOM would be his last 'conventional' film and his last working for producer Sam ATOM MAN VS SUPERMAN Katzman. This B&W western-flavored melodrama set in 1950s Colorado was written by George THE SON OF ROBIN HOOD Slavin, Norman RIDE OUT FOR REVENGE Retchin and famed play write George W. George who scripted 1981s MY DINNER WITH ANDRE. Dennis THE GUN THAT WON THE WEST Morgan (Brad) plays a uranium miner who hits the motherlode along with his partner Grady; William HELL ON DEVIL'S ISLAND Talman. Before the men can stake their claim Brad has a quickie marriage to a lovely woman named Jean (Patricia THE BEAST FROM HOLLOW MOUNTAIN Medina) unaware she's the former love of his now outraged business partner. Grady vows to ruin them all out of spite and employs a vampy bad girl (Tina FROM HELL IT CAME Carver) and claim jumpers to swindle the newlyweds. Will love conquer all? This slight soap opera's rather entertaining all things considered and at only 67 minutes it's a breeze to sit through.
- DirectorChester ErskineStarsClaudette ColbertFred MacMurrayMarjorie MainOn their wedding night, Bob reveals to Betty that he has purchased an abandoned chicken farm. Betty struggles to adapt to their new rural lifestyle, especially when a glamorous neighbor seems to set her eyes on Bob.Chester A GIRL IN EVERY PORT Erskine wrote/directed this adaption of Betty MacDonald's million copy best-selling autobiography. Oscar nominated screenwriter Irving MEET ME IN ST. LOUIS Brecher contributed to the genuinely funny story of how a 1930s debutante came to be the the wife of a good-natured chicken-farmer. Claudette IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT Colbert & Fred DOUBLE INDEMNITY MacMurray are simply radiant and magical onscreen together as Betty & Bob MacDonald. Their hillbilly neighbors MA AND PA KETTLE (Marjorie THE BELLE OF NEW YORK Main and Percy KNICKERBOCKER HOLIDAY Kilbride) stole the show with their undeniable comedic chemistry. After Main was nominated for an Oscar for her Supporting Actress role Universal signed the pair to a MA AND PA KETTLE (1949) spin-off which spawned an additional 8 sequels! In 1951 a 15 minute long daytime serial version aired for one season. Kilbride (who grew a bit contemptuous of the character he played) quit the cult classic B-movie franchise after 1954s MA AND PA KETTLE AT HOME while Main would remain until 1957s THE KETTLES ON OLD MACDONALD'S FARM which would also be her cinematic swan-song. B&W.
- DirectorCharles LamontStarsMarjorie MainPercy KilbrideRichard LongOn the verge of being evicted from their run-down farmhouse, the large Kettle family is given a new, modern home after Pa wins a contest, but he is accused of plagiarizing his winning slogan by a jealous local woman.Quaint describes this genuine cult classic when viewed today. It's less sophisticated than your average rerun of THE BEVERLY HILLBILLIES yet still has a glimmer of Hollywood magic. MA AND PA KETTLE (Marjorie MA AND PA KETTLE ON VACATION Main, Percey THE KETTLES OF THE OZARKS Kilbride) returned to bijou screens for this hit B-movie comedy spun off from 1947s Oscar nominated THE EGG & I. The dirt farming clan are told to pack up their moonshine still and herd of slightly psychotic kids when the town condemns their run down house. As luck would have it, on the very day the Kettle's eldest son Tom (Richard NANNY AND THE PROFESSOR Long) comes home from college to meet the girl of his dreams (Meg THE LIFE OF RILEY Randall) his father wins a state-of-the-art, luxury mansion after submitting a slogan to a tobacco manufacturer. Town busy-body Birdy Hicks (Esther BLONDIE GOES TO COLLEGE Dale) may have something to say about that while the old fashioned hillbillies struggle with modern concepts like remote controled TV and zap-ray ovens. Al LEGO MA AND PA KETTLE Lewis, Herb FRANCIS IN THE HAUNTED HOUSE Margolis & Lou THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN Morheim wrote the gentle screenplay for frequent Kettle series director Charles ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET THE MUMMY Lamont. There's a few moments of eyebrow raising material with overt native american stereeotypes on dispay by first nations actor Chief SON OF GERANIMO: THE APACHE AVENGER Yowlachie but like legendary actor Montan Moreland he was also a highly regarded performer and a pioneer in the film world within his ethnic community. Next up; MA AND PA KETTLE GO TO TOWN. B&W.
- DirectorCharles LamontStarsMarjorie MainPercy KilbrideRichard LongWhen Pa wins a jingle-writing contest, he and Ma head for New York City. They get in trouble with gangsters when they lose some stolen money which they had already agreed to deliver to one of the thugs.This would be the second of five MA AND PA KETTLE adventures Charles ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET THE KEYSTONE COPS Lamont directed for Universals vintage B-movie series spun off from the best-selling novel & film THE EGG AND I. Martha ABBOTT AND COSTELLO IN THE FOREIGN LEGION Ragaway & Leonard GET SMART: THE NUDE BOMB Stern wrote this B&W comedy which picks up where MA AND PA KETTLE ended; with Pa (Percy KNICKERBOCKER HOLIDAY Kilbride) winning an all expense trip to New York provided he & Ma (Marjorie THE SHADOW Main) can find a sitter for their 14 hellacious kids. Their eldest son & his new bride (Richard THE BIG VALLEY Long & Meg MA AND PA KETTLE BACK ON THE FARM Randall) are waiting for them to come along to help with a chicken incubator the inventor has been trying to manufacture provided he can get his hands on some money. Pa has plenty of money but doesn't know it. The bank robber (Charles THE NIGHT STALKER McGraw) hired to watch their kids tricked the hillbillies into smuggling a bag of stolen loot to another goon waiting in NYC. Jim THE HARLEM GLOBETROTTER'S ON GILLIGAN'S ISLAND Backus has a memorable supporting role in this fondly remembered slice of Saturday matinee Americana.
- DirectorEdward SedgwickStarsMarjorie MainPercy KilbrideRichard LongThe Kettles leave their ultra-modern home and return to the country looking for uranium. Ma and Tom's mother-in-law, Mrs. Parker, fight over whether their grandchild will be raised "hygienically".If you thought George Orwell's 1984 was reflective of the socialist threat faced by the free world today allow me to introduce to you MA AND PA KETTLE BACK ON THE FARM which plays in sinc like a prophecy by Nostrodamus. A group of crooked investors plan to swindle Ma & Pa (Marjorie PRISON FARM Main & Percy GEORGE WASHINGTON SLEPT HERE Kilbride) for their uranium rich property using loopholes in the law to get away with their crime. The Kettles (who raised 15 kids just fine) are suddenly forced to wear masks by a racist wealthy Bostonian inlaw (German actress Barbara MA AND PA KETTLE ONN VACATION Brown). She uses her authority to further attack the beseiged family & indiginous friends who are forced to comply. All to keep Tom Kettle's (Richard THE HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL Long) newborn son from catching the common cold. It's an extreme measure but Tom's wife (Meg WITHOUT WARNING Randall) has been brainwashed into believing her child's life is endangered by her mother's junk science and conspires to rob the umasked Kettle family of their parental rights. The unmasked Native Americans (Teddy MA AND PA KETTLE AT THE FAIR Hart, Oliver THE WALLS OF JERICO Blake) are treated no better. The Indians are referred to as "germ carrying savages" during one cringe worthy scene as they are driven back to their wigwams until they learn to obey. There's also a gag towards the end which plays white slavery for larfs, I kid you not! The rather enjoyable romp feels decades younger than it is thanks to a screenplay which rhymes uncomfortably with the era of Covid. Seriously, the hysteria over microbes and forcing folks to wear masks which do not prevent the spread of corona virus is cruel and unusal. The flu bug has existed on this planet for a billion years and hasn't tried to wipe us out yet. With millions of years of, proven, natural coexistence it's safe to conclude our species are thriving together. Covid is just a flu bug with strong ties to the fake news industry. Your odds of dying from the Wuhan strain of the flu is almost statistically the same as dying from spontaneous human combustion. Will the Kettles get to keep their natural resources and their family together or will they be forced into economic slavery? They fared better than we are with Covid now a pop up trillion dollar industry. Your participation in this global shakedown is mandatory. I lived during the AIDS epidemic of the 80s when a new bug was causing a sizable number of deaths. The devasted insurance industry was front page news as would the insurance companies be today IF the covid stats were true. The truth is the wuhan flu is the least threatening pandemic in eons! The human population has risen throughout bucking the trend established by most of the deadlier 100,000+ strains of infectious microbial life moving freely among us. I'm not a conspiracy theorist. The fact is during the 80s the air was thick with grief. You attended a lot more funerals. You spent a lot of time in hospitals visiting the sick. I don't know anyone who died from flu this year. I have yet to see an obituary in the local paper citing cause of death as Covid. That newspaper is loaded with hyperventilating covid headlines from front to back but the word itself has yet to pop up in the obits. Just an observation. MA AND PA KETTLE was spun off from the 1947 hit THE EGG & I. This third portentious sequel was written by Jack SPOOKS RUN WILD Henley for director Edward BEWARE, SPOOKS! Sedgwick & it's one of the better entries in the vintage series. Followed by MA AND PA KETTLE AT THE FAIR. B&W
- DirectorCharles BartonStarsMarjorie MainPercy KilbrideJames BestMa and Pa are trying to raise enough money at the county fair to send their daughter Rosie to college. Ma competes in baking and Pa enters a trotter in a horse race, while Rosie takes up with handsome young Marvin Johnson.Marjorie HEAVEN CAN WAIT Main & Percy FEUDIN', FUSSIN' & A-FIGHTIN'! Kilbride returned for this fourth MA AND PA KETTLE comedy cult classic spun off from the Oscar nominated hit; THE EGG & I. The rustic pair need to raise money for their eldest daughter's education. Lori FRANCIS GOES TO WESTPOINT Nelson as Rosie Kettle has more than college tuition to think about when she meets handsome Marvin Johnson (James THE DUKES OF HAZZARD Best). Town busy-body Birdie Hicks (Esther BLONDIE HAS SERVANT TROUBLE Dale) has her nose in everybody's business while Emory THE CRIME DOCTOR'S GAMBLE Parnell tries to keep the peace as vender Billy Reed. Leonard GET SMART AGAIN! Stern, Martin ABBOTT AND COSTELLO IN THE FOREIGN LEGION Ragaway, Jack BLONDIE HITS THE JACKPOT Henly, John ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET DR. JEKYLL & MR. HYDE Grant and Richard THE UNSINKABLE MOLLY BROWN Morris all contributed to the screenplay for this sweet-natured B&W comedy from director Charles ABBOTT AND COSTELLA MEET THE KILLER BORIS KARLOFF Barton. Followed by MA AND PA KETTLE ON VACATION in 1952.
- DirectorCharles LamontStarsMarjorie MainPercy KilbrideRay CollinsThe Kettles are in Paris along with their daughter-in-law's parents the Parkers. Pa tries to buy racy postcards. He also gets in big trouble when he is given a letter to deliver to Adolph Wade, a spy who gets killed by spies Inez and Cyrus Kraft.MA AND PA KETTLE ON VACATION (aka: MA AND PA KETTLE IN PARIS) was the 5th film in the spin off series to the 1947 comedy classic THE EGG & I featuring Marjorie Main & Percy Kilbride in their signature roles. The famous duo had also worked together in FEUDIN', FUSSIN' AND A-FIGHTIN' and enjoyed considerable on-screen comedic chemistry in this popular entry to their cult classic B-movie franchise. The hillbilly couple are invited to a vacation in Paris by the parents of their son's wife. Ray Collins & Barbara Brown had previously played Kim's wealthy, Bostonian parents in MA AND PA KETTLE BACK ON THE FARM. The couples get to riff on their class differences while Ma demonstrates down-home feminism. Pa, meanwhile, has received a secret message from a spy (Peter ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST Brocco) who later turns up dead! A 2nd 5th columnist (Ivan THE AMAZING TRANSPARENT MAN Triesault) takes the wives hostage to get his hands on the intel. Pa, having raised 15 kids knows how to deal with terrorists. The trailer invites audiences to visit with their old friends and after 7 decades seeing these beloved, slightly faded characters makes for a brief, charming reunion I very much enjoyed. Charles ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET THE INVISIBLE MAN Lamont directed this better-than-average programmer based on a screenplay by Jack BOZO GOES TO COLLEGE Henley. The yuk-yukking yokels would hit theatre screens next in 1954 with the non-sequential MA AND PA KETTLE AT HOME. B&W
- DirectorCharles LamontStarsMarjorie MainPercy KilbrideAlan MowbrayMa and Pa Kettle get the farm in order to help their son Elwin win a scholarship.This would be the 8th and final appearance of Percy THE ADVENTURES OF MARK TWAIN Kilbride as Pa Kettle. The actor was close to 70 & had grown contemptuous of the role which made him a household name. MA AND PA KETTLE AT HOME was filmed after MA AND PA KETTLE AT WAIKIKI but released non-sequentially. It's also memorable for being one of the better episodes in the popular B-movie series from Universal. Co-star Marjorie HEAVEN CAN WAIT Main and Kilbride are in top form and complement one another to perfection. The screenplay's maybe a little formulaic with a pair of city judges (Ross INDESTRUCTIBLE MAN ELLIOTT, Alan CHARLIE CHAN IN LONDON Mobray) forced to spend time on the Kettle farm to grade the older Kettle son (Brett THE RETURN OF THE FLY Halsey) on an essay. The younger Kettle child who made it to main credits was Richard Eyer who played the genie in THE 7TH VOYAGE OF SINBAD. This would mark the 1st and only appearance of Stan BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE DOLLS Ross as Crowbar & the 5th and final time Oliver GIANT FROM THE UNKNOWN Blake would appear as Geoduck. The politically incorrect character had previously been played by John THE EGG & I Berkes & Lester Allen in the 1st 2 Kettle pics. This crowd-pleasing hit was directed by Charles ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET CAPTAIN KIDD Lamont based on a breezy script by Kay LASSIE: A CHRISTMAS TALE Lenard. Filmed in B&W.
- DirectorLee SholemStarsMarjorie MainPercy KilbrideLori NelsonMa and Pa, with their daughter Rosie, go off to Hawai'i to answer ailing Cousin Rodney's call for help running his pineapple farm while he recovers. Pa soon causes a major explosion and gets himself kidnapped.MA AND PA KETTLE AT WAIKIKI was the 7th film based on Betty MacDonald's charming autobiographical best-seller THE EGG & I. Although filmed in 1952 it sat on the shelf until 1955 after the release of MA AND PA KETTLE AT HOME. Star Percy GEORGE WASHINGTON SLEPT HERE Kilbride was nearly 70 and eager to retire the character. This lackluster comedy was flatly directed by Lee 'Roll 'em' Sholem. Sholem was one of the most reliable B movie/television directors in Hollywood due to his ridged shooting schedules and adherence to budget but he didn't have an artistic bone in his body. The usually reliable MA AND PA KETTLE franchise suffers under his heavy hand. It's just not especially funny despite a host of contributors to the busy screenplay. Jack PRIVATE SNUFFY SMITH Henley, Harry MAISIE GOES TO RENO Clork, Edward THE BOWERY BOYS MEET THE MONSTERS Ullman & Connie BLONDIE'S BLESSED EVENT Bennett all chipped in their two cents worth to little avail. This was one of the least entertaining movies in the series which found Pa & Ma (Oscar nominee Marjorie PRISON FARM Main) travel to Hawaii with their pretty daughter Rosie (Lori REVENGE OF THE CREATURE Nelson). Nelson hadn't made an appearance since MA AND PA KETTLE AT THE FAIR. The Kettles hope to save their relative Rodney (Loring SHADOW OF THE THIN MAN Smith) from financial ruin while dealing with the usual, gently handled clashes of culture. Frequent guest star Esther BLONDIE HAS SERVANT TROUBLE Dale returns as the gossipy Birdy Hicks who finds an ally in the snobbish Mrs. Anderson (Mabel WHAT'S UP DOC? Albertson). Look for Russell RESCUE FROM GILLIGAN'S ISLAND Johnson in a supporting role. This vintage, B&W comedy would be the last for Oliver Blake & Teddy Hart who were cast as the overly stereotypical Native American characters Geoduck & Crowbar. Followed by THE KETTLES IN THE OZARKS. B&W
- DirectorCharles LamontStarsMarjorie MainArthur HunnicuttUna MerkelMa and the kids head back to the Ozarks for a visit with Pa's brother Uncle Sedge. He's working his way through a twenty years long relationship with Miss Bedelia Baines.Oscar nominees Marjorie FUEDIN', FUSSIN AND A-FIGHTIN' Main & Arthur THE MILLION DOLLAR DUCK Hunnicutt co-starred in this 8th MA AND PA KETTLE adventure although as you may have guessed from the title; there is no Pa! The iconic Percy Kilbride retired in 1954 leaving Universal execs scrambling to find a replacement. Frank Twedell who starred opposite Doris Rich in the 1951 CBS serial THE EGG & I declined so the character of Sedgwick was introduced as a substitute. Sedgewick is a lazy hillbilly from Mournful Hollow, Arkansas with moonshiners in his barn and a girlfriend about to walk out the door after putting up with his foolishness for 20 years. Ma and the kids head over to set things right. Una BULLDOG DRUMMOND STRIKES BACK! Merkel & Hunnicutt are fine together, I suppose but they weren't what the fans of the franchise were paying to see. Charles INTERNATIONAL CRIME Lamont directed this lesser installment of the vintage B&W series working from a script by Kay MA AND PA KETTLE AT HOME Leonard. The controversial character of Crowbar was absent after the native american on whom he was based sued. Not only did Raymond Johnson sue for defamation, humiliation & ridicule but half the real-life Kettles sued as well! The Bishop family may have been hillbillies but they knew how to lawyer up and went after close to a million dollars to compensate. Although Betty MacDonald did settle one lawsuit brought by Eddie Bishop & his wife for an undisclosed amount the majority were thrown out by the judge who ruled in favor of the author's right to artistic license. Judge William Willkins also brought justice at the Nuremberg Trials. Could use more like him these days. Look for ONE DAY AT A TIME actress Bonnie Franklin making her film debut. Up next: THE KETTLES ON OLD MACDONALD'S FARM.
- DirectorVirgil W. VogelStarsMarjorie MainParker FennellyGloria TalbottMa and Pa do their bit to hook lumberman Brad Johnson up with spoiled socialite Sally Flemming. Ma teaches Sally how to behave like a hick so she'll be compatible with Brad.During the late 40s-early 50s popular franchises like FRANCIS THE TALKING MULE and MA & PA KETTLE helped pull Universal studios financial fat out of the fire although they're rather unfashionable & obscure today. This would be the ninth & final installment of the vintage cult classic series spun off from the Oscar nominated hit; THE EGG AND I. Marjorie THE WISTFUL WIDOW OF WAGON GAP Main originated the role of Ma for the 1947 adaptation of Betty MacDonald's 1945 autobiographical bestseller. This would be her last appearance and the 1st for Peter THE RUSSIANS ARE COMING! THE RUSSIANS ARE COMING! Fennelly as her lay-a-bout spouse Pa replacing the irreplaceable Percy Kilbride who abandoned the character after 1954s MA AND PA KETTLE AT HOME. This formulaic B&W bumpkin satire featured the spoiled daughter (Gloria I MARRIED A MONSTER FROM OUTER SPACE Talbott) of a wealthy snob (Roy BILLY THE KID VERSUS DRACULA Bancroft) taking a crash course at the Kettle farm on how to lose her high falutin ways in order to please her newlywed lumberjack husband (John BLOOD LEGACY Smith). The likeable cast also included Oscar winner Clause THE INVISIBLE MAN Rains, & Claude THE MISADVENTURES OF SHERIFF LOBO Adkins. The usually robust cast of Kettle kids (numbered at 15) was whittled down to just one shown on camera. Writers Herb FRANCIS IN THE HAUNTER HOUSE Margolis & William KILLERS FROM SPACE Raynor assisted Jake TWO YANKS IN TRINIDAD Henley with his more-of-the-same screenplay. A lesser effort from director Virgil BEULAH LAND Vogel. A recast MA AND PA KETTLE also appeared in the 1951-1952 daytime serial THE EGG AND I. Keep your ears peeled for the musical contributions of famed composer Henry THE PINK PANTHER Mancini.
- DirectorJohn SturgesStarsYul BrynnerSteve McQueenCharles BronsonSeven gunfighters are hired by Mexican peasants to liberate their village from oppressive bandits.In 2013 director John THE GREAT EASCAPE Sturges 1960 masterpiece THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN was selected for preservation with the Library of Congress by the National Film Registry for it's cultural, historic and aesthetic significance. The finished screenplay was written by an uncredited Robert Newman who also had his name taken off the credits of THE GREAT ESCAPE because of behind the scenes friction between the two. William RIDE THE HIGH COUNTRY Roberts scored top billing but the story was based on an adaptation of Akira Kurosawa's 1954 Japanese classic SEVEN SAMURAI written by blacklisted scribe Walter THE FRONT Bernstein. Composer Elmer Bernstein (no relation) was also persecuted during the infamous era of MacCarthyism and saw his promising career derailed. The top Hollywood composer was left working on notorious Grade Z productions like ROBOT MONSTER and CAT WOMEN ON THE MOON. There's something very magnificent about how these two artists came together after surviving such an ordeal to craft something so perfect I can only describe it as ESSENTIAL viewing especially for fans of the classic western genre. Bernstein's score would become synonymous with the brand and also a phenomenally successful tie-in with the Marlboro Cigarette manufacturers. It's so quotable within popular culture you may hear passages in everything from LIVE AND LET DIE to THE SIMPSONS. THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN starred a fantastic cast of seasoned pros and young actors on the cusp of superstardom...everyone except Bead 13 FIGHTING MEN Dexter. His career went nowhere but he probably just needed a better publicist. Yul FUTUREWORLD Brynner is as iconic as Clint Eastwood was for his Man With No Name and his performance ranks among his Oscar worthy best. A young Steve THE BLOB McQueen made a bold impression as hot-shot Vin Tanner. Bisexual actor Horst ACES: IRON EAGLES III Bucholz as Chico, James LOOKER Coburn as Britt, Robert BATTLE BEYOND THE STARS Vaughn as Lee and action movie legend Charles DEATH WISH V: THE FACE OF DEATH Bronson led the cast as a pack of ruthless mercenaries hired to protect the out-gunned citizens of a law-abiding town under attack by a group of murderous Mexicans. Eli HOW THE WEST WAS WON Wallach makes for a terrific villain as Calvera; leader of the dishonorable hombres. Sharp-eyed genre buffs may also spot Val THE AMITYVILLE HORROR Avery and Whit I WAS A TEENAGE FRANKENSTEIN Bissell in this superbly cast adventure that radiates with the grandeur of old Hollywood charm and razzle-dazzle. Sturges stages the climactic gun battle with care and expertise, building the suspense towards an often heart-rending resolution. THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN is that rare remake that can stand proudly along side the original and compare evenly. It went on to become an international hit spawning 3 theatrical sequels, a 1998-2000 CBS tv show and a 2016 franchise reboot starring Denzel Washington.
- DirectorBurt KennedyStarsYul BrynnerRobert FullerJulián MateosTwo survivors of the original Magnificent Seven, Chris and Vin, recruit four new members to re-form the outfit and defend several Mexican villages from vicious bandits.The trailer for RETURN OF THE SEVEN has this to say about our posse; (in his 2nd appearence Yul WESTWORLD Brynner) "Chris, the strong one. Bigger than any battle he's ever had to stop.". (Robert THE BRAIN FROM PLANET AROUS Fuller replacing Steve McQueen) "Vin, the kind of man who fights when the cause is good and the odds are not.". (Julian FOUR RIDE OUT Mateos subbing for Horst Buchholz) "Chico, He's a man with violence in his past...and future.". (Warren BADLANDS Oates) "Colbee, Violent, verile. He kills many men. That leaves many women.". (Virgilio THE MAGNIFICENT TWO Texeira) "Louis, rough, roguish. Spending his life like it was going out of style.". (Claude THE KETTLES ON MACDONALD'S FARM Aitkins) "Frank, a man who makes himself what he has to be...even if it's a target.". (Jordan STAR 80 Christopher) "Manuel, Wild, untamed. A boy who was born to be reckless and made to be loved!". I suspect these characters were better drawn on the page given the reputation of writer Larry IT'S ALIVE! Cohen. RETURN OF THE SEVEN isn't a bad film but it's a huge step down in terms of quality acoss the boards compared to the original. It's also well below Cohen's ability. Director Burt ALL THE KIND STRANGERS Kennedy seemed uncomfortable with many of the Spanish actors so may have had difficulty filming a spaghetti western in Madrid. Elisa DJANGO THE CONDEMNED Mantes as Petra (filling in for Rosenda Manteras) hires the gunslingers to rescue the villagers who've been taken to work as slaves while the woman are left defenseless against the mauraders. Emilio THE WILD BUNCH Fernando played the bandit leader driven mad with grief over the death of his sons who has taken the men hostage in order to erect a church in their honor. Fernando was rumored to have posed for the gold sculpture handed out at the Academy Awards. Speaking of; legenday film composer Elmer THE BLUES BROTHERS Bernstein nabbed another nomination for this mostly recycled score. Followed by GUNS OF THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN.
- DirectorPaul WendkosStarsGeorge KennedyJames WhitmoreMonte MarkhamGunslinger Chris Adams is hired by a Mexican revolutionary to organize the rescue of his cause's leader from a brutal Army prison.George AIRPORT '77 Kennedy doesn't even begin to fill the cowboy boots worn by the iconic Yul Brynner as Chris Adams in 1960s THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN or it's sequel. The mercinary is contracted to free a resistance leader being tortured by the sadistic Col. Diego. Michael BUCK ROGERS IN THE 25TH CENTURY Ansara is suitably evil as the genocidal despot and veteran character actor Fernando Rey as the political prisoner previously appeared in 1966s RETURN OF THE SEVEN. Kennedy's pick of the posse litter's not much to brag about. There's not a Steve McQueen in the wild bunch. Bernie ROOTS: THE NEXT GENERATION Casey, Joe WALKING TALL Don Baker, Monte BAYWATCH Markam, Reni THE STUDENT NURSES Santani, Scott THE NEW LAND Thomas and James NUTS Whitmore round out the B-movie cast. Director Paul GIDGET GOES HAWAIIAN Wendkos spends far too long building up to the climactic jailbreak and writer Herman THE INVISIBLE BOY Hoffman gave the cast little to say or do until the routinely satisfying finale. The majestic score composed by Edgar THE AGE OF INNOCENCE Bernstein resonanates throughout lending GUNS OF THE MAGNICENT SEVEN a certain degree of credibility it hardly deserves. Followed by the slightly superior THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN RIDE!
- DirectorGeorge McCowanStarsLee Van CleefStefanie PowersMichael CallanForced by personal circumstances, Marshal Chris Adams recruits a writer and five prisoners to help him eliminate a gang of Mexican bandits.Akira Surosawa's 1954 masterpiece SEVEN SAMURAI was remade most famously for 1960s beloved western classic THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN. By the time this fourth & final entry in the franchise hit empty theaters the blum had worn off the yellow rose. Spaghetti-western superstar Lee THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY Van Cleef may not be as iconic in the role of Chris Adams as Yul WESTWORLD Brynner had been but he's a step up from George THE CONCORDE: AIRPORT '79 Kennedy who led the cast of the unpopular GUNS OF THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN. When Cleef's alarmingly younger bride (Mariette THE RETURN OF COUNT YORGA Hartley) is kidnapped/raped/murdered by a pair of drooling dolts (Gary THE BUDDY HOLLY STORY Busey, Darrell FUTUREWORLD Lawson) he rides out for revenge with a fake news reporter (Yes, fake news propaganda was a thing even then) to document the adventure. Michael LEPRECHAUN 3 Callen as the journalist-4-hire reminded me of a repressed Nathan Lane but of the seven posse he probably fares best. The gang of peckin' and pawin' outlaws recruited by Sheriff Ralph CARNIVALE Waite & suicide-squad leader Van Cleef to rescue a town of recently widowed rape survivors from a rapey bandito (Ron THE JERK, TOO Steh) are sketchily drawn at best. William CAPTAIN AMERICA II: DEATH TOO SOON Lucking, Pedro DON'T BE AFRAID OF THE DARK Almndaris, Jr., James HILL STREET BLUES Sikking Ed GUYANA TRAGEDY: THE STORY OF JIM JONES Laughter and Luke BIG LOVE Askew appear as the rest of our likeable gang of anti-heroes. The recently, repeatedly raped widows fall madly in love with their rescuers especially Stephanie THE GIRL FROM U.N.C.L.E. Powers as the no-longer-grieving Van Cleef's alarmingly younger new love interest. He orders her to blow the rest of the women and children to bits should the rape-happy Mexicans return to claim the shreds of their virtue. The social justice politics were appalling back in the day, were they not? Just like Van Cleef's performance which also didn't care about your feelings. During one whimsical scene a gunslinger grabs himself an armful of giggling rape victims while declaring himself to be Mormon. The tawdry screenplay by Arthur LAND OF THE MINOTAUR Rowe was artlessly presented by Canadian director George THE STARLOST Casan who genre addics may remember for THE OVER THE HILL GANG RIDES AGAIN. A stronger cinematographer than Fred BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE DOLLS Koenekamp behind the camera may have salvaged the climactic duel frrom being so predictably staged and less-than-thrilling. For an adult western drama there's surprisingly little bloodshed and no on-screen sexual violence. Of the cast only Lauter would return as a guest star for the short-lived THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN which ran for two abrieviated seasons on CBS between 1998-2000. The unforgettable score from prolific composer Elmer CAT WOMEN ON THE MOON Bemstein was recycled for THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN RIDE! and would be again for the 2016 franchise reboot.
- CreatorPen DenshamJohn WatsonStarsMichael BiehnEric CloseAndrew KavovitWhen an Indian village is threatened by former Confederate soldiers, the villagers go in search of help. They recruit seven men, each with unique skills, who return to the village and confront the raiders.This modestly acclaimed western drama was based on the 1954 Japanese masterpiece SEVEN SAMURAI and the almost equally famous THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN it inspired. CBS launched this TV series version from re-creators Pen THE OUTER LIMITS Densham & John POLTERGEIST: THE LEGACY Watson. The cast featured Michael THE TERMINATOR Biehn as Chris Larabee (Larabee being the middle name of Yul Brynner's character; Chris Adams). The young gunfighter has devoted his life to finding the man who killed his family and to defending his town. His right hand man was played by Eric NASHVILLE Close assuming the part played in the 1960s by Steve McQueen. The other 5 members of the gang were loose amalgamations of the more popular characters from the 1st four films. Andrew THE DAVID CASSIDY STORY Kavovit, Dale PET SEMATARY Midhiff, Ron ALIEN: RESSURRECTION Perlman, Anthony RETURN OF THE KILLER TOMATOES Starke and Rick MURDER ONE Worthy form the remainder of the playfully nefarious group. In a major casting coup Robert SUPERMAN III Vaughn joined the promising show in a recurring role after originating the traumatized part of Lee from 40 years before. Also back was the opulent score by Elmer SPACEHUNTER: ADVENTURES IN THE FORBIDDEN ZONE Bernstein which is synonymous with the brand. Despite a loyal fanbase ratings were low and the network slashed their 1st season order to only 9 episodes. An impromptu letter writing campaign bought the emmy nominated series a 13 episode second season reprieve but soon after THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN was quietly cancelled. The final hour was devoted to Larabee bringing his wife's killer to justice. Look for Laurie THE BOYS Holden as Biehn's recurring love interest. The franchise would next be revived for 2016's big-screen re-imagining starring Denzel Washington.
- DirectorAntoine FuquaStarsDenzel WashingtonChris PrattEthan HawkeSeven gunmen from a variety of backgrounds are brought together by a vengeful young widow to protect her town from the private army of a destructive industrialist.Antoine Fuqua insisted on diversity when recasting THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN but predictably cast a white man as the villain and ultimately directed a film that was better than Disney's THE LONE RANGER & about as historically accurate as HARRIET. Fuqua allows his personal agenda to color the characters like he's picking his favorite flavors from a bag of jelly beans. He sanitized their backstories undermining their dramatic strength. What made THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN so powerful was it's ability to allow these truly villainous men to find redemption during one last glorious battle. Those western movie acts of self sacrifice were worth their weight in dramatic gold. The 2016 remake gives us only cliches as a payoff and suffers terribly by comparison. Denzel Washington who worked with Fuqua on the recent big-screen THE EQUILIZER action pics isn't even in the same ballpark as the legendary Yul Brynner who carried the remake of Akira Kurosawa's SEVEN SAMURAI effortlessly and with considerable grace. Washington (re-named Chisholm) comes across as uptight much of the time and is saddled with a race-baiting backstory that stinks of contrivance. His flavor-of-the-month co-stars are; Chris JURASSIC WORLD Pratt as Joshua, Ethan TRAINING DAY Hawke as Goodnight Robichaeux, Martin WESTWORLD Sensmeier as Red Harvest, Manuel FROM DUSK TILL DAWN: THE SERIES Garcia-Rulfo as Vasquez, Vincent CHIPS D'Onofrio as Jack and Lee TERMINATOR: GENISYS Byung-Hum as Billy. Actress Hayley MARLEY & ME Bennett (replacing actor Jorge Martinez de Hoyos) plays the town-leader who hires the posse to protect her community from a racist railroad baron named Bartholonew (Peter GREEN LANTERN Sarsgaard) and his white-collar, gun-slinging henchmen. That's not to take anything away from Sarsgaard. He's a perfectly dislikable cad who'd shoot a widowed bride's husband dead at 20 paces but Mrs. Bennett's primarily concerned with the exploitation of the workers and the raping of the environment. Fuqua took top billing among the screen-writers which also included Nic TRUE DETECTIVE Pizzolatto & Richard THE EXPENDABLES 2 Wenk. Unbilled John Lee Hancock has gone on record as claiming the bulk of the screenplay was his own and I don't doubt that one bit after seeing his 2004 box-office catastrophe THE ALAMO. What saves this glossy re-imagining is the thrillingly staged battle sequences bolstered by expert stunt work and special effects artistry but I'm taking a star off for the PG ratings advisory warning issued because of 'smoking violence'. How ironic is it that Bernstein's original theme from THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN was used to sell millions of cigarettes when Marlboros ruled the smoking range with that legendary movie tie-in ad campaign? Oscar winner James Horner composed the bulk of the soundtrack utilizing much of the score made famous by Elmer Bernstein. Horner also composed the theme to Roger Corman's wildly under-rated THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN rip-off BATTLE BEYOND THE STARS which is better than this every day of the week. Disappointingly average.
- DirectorJ. Farrell MacDonaldStarsViolet MacMillanFrank MooreRaymond RussellOjo and Unc Nunkie are out of food, so they decide to journey to the Emerald City where they will never starve.L. Frank Baum's classic children's novel THE WONDERFUL WIZARD OF OZ (1900) spawned 13 sequels the last of which was GLINDA OF OZ in 1920. THE PATCHWORK GIRL OF OZ was the 7th adventure written in 1913 and went into production under the financially strapped author's own banner; The Oz Film Manufacturing Company the following year. Actress Violet Millan plays a Munchkin boy named Ojo travelling to the Emerald City with his elder Unc Nunkie. The actor who played Unc Nunkie (Frank Moore) & Millan were recurring players in the films Baum made with director J. Farrell MacDonald but didn't always appear in the same parts. Moore for example would return in HIS MAJESTY, THE SCARECROW OF OZ as the Scarecrow while the actress took on Dorothy Gale. The pair meet a traveling alchemist who hopes to construct a servant-girl made of entirely from magical rags. Male acrobat Pierre Couderc played Scraps with uncanny grace. Much of this film hinged on Scrap's dexterity and fluency with pantomime, dancing and pratfalls. Baum made alterations to the plot when adapting his book but Lon Musgrave turns up as The Tin Man, future cinematographer Bert HOUSE OF WAX 3D Glennon as The Scarecrow and legendary producer Hal Roach as The Cowardly Lion. Roach & beloved actor Harold Lloyd (who he met on the set of THE PATCHWORK GIRL OF OZ) would come to rival Chaplin during the silent era. Die-hard fans of Baum and his magnificent series may appreciate the surviving films he produced but anyone expecting a movie resembling 1939's all-time masterpiece THE WIZARD OF OZ will be hugely disappointed. Sometimes the vintage B&W pics barely resembled the books they were based on. This one contains not one scripted line from the novel and the musical arrangements are nothing to sing about. The movie tanked in theatres and was at one time considered lost. Various prints usually run between 65-81 minutes. Undaunted by the movie's failure Baum made 2 more before his studio filed for bankruptcy in 1915. The writer's son would produce a fourth film in 1925 with Oliver Hardy cast as The Tin Man hoping to keep his father's legacy alive. After more than a century of international success across all media you can rest assured that legacy is secure. Followed by THE NEW WIZARD OF OZ and THE MAGIC CLOAK OF OZ.
- DirectorJ. Farrell MacDonaldStarsViolet MacMillanFrank MoorePierre CoudercThe wicked king wants his daughter, Princess Gloria, to marry a horrid courtier though she loves the gardener's boy Pon. After encountering Dorothy, Pon and her team up to defeat the evil witch Mombi and to rescue the princess.In 1914 best-selling children's author L. frank Baun lformed The Oz Film Manufacturing Company hoping to capitalise on the enormous success of the franchise he launched with the publication of 1900's THE WONDERFUL WIZARD OF OZ. Baum wrote 13 sequels while dozens of others have been produced in the decades since his death. More than a century later the mythology of Oz continues to fascinate audiences into the new millennium. many of the alterations Baum made in adapting his novel would be incorporated into his 9th adventure; THE SCARECROW OF OZ (1915). Like THE PATCHWORK GIRL OF OZ, HIS MAJESTY THE SCARECROW OF OZ failed to find an audience. The overly complicated plot finds Dorothy Gale (Violet THE MAGIC CLOAK OF OZ MacMillan) being stalked by the evil witch Mombi (Mai THE LAST EGYPTIAN Wells) to prevent The Scarecrow (Frank THE PATCHWORK GIRL OF OZ Moore) from his claiming rightful place as Ruler of Emerald City. The position's currently filled by the despotic King Krewl (Raymond THE GRAY NUN OF BELGIUM Russell) who has also ordered The Cowardly Lion (Fred Woodward) & The Tin Man (acrobat Pierre ON YOUR TOES Couderc) captured. Vivian Reed co-stars as the King's daughter involved in a love triangle. The actress made an uncredited appearance Victor Flemming's masterpiece THE WIZARD OF OZ in 1939. Modern copies of THE NEW WIZARD OF OZ (The title used for it's 1915 re-release) generously run 59 minutes. For many years this was considered a lost film by director J. Farrell MacDonnald. Parts of it are still missing and will likely never be restored. Hardcore fans of the books will probably enjoy viewing this more than general audiences. It may play well as a double feature with Disney's 1985 flop RETURN TO OZ. Silent/B&W. Followed by THE MAGIC CLOAK OF OZ.
- DirectorLarry SemonStarsDorothy DwanCharles MurrayOliver HardyDorothy, heir to the Oz throne, must take it back from the wicked Prime Minister Kruel with the help of three farmhands.Frank Baum, Jr. took credit for the screenplay adaption of his father's classic children's novel THE WONDERFUL WIZARD OF OZ. The end result is nothing like the book, the 1939 MGM masterpiece or anything else seen before or since. Dorothy OBEY YOUR HUSBAND! Dwan (Whose real life fiancee was co-star/director Larry Semon) plays an adult Dorothy Gale shocked to learn she's been consigned to an arranged marriage in Oz. A tornado sweeps the young woman and 3 farm-hand friends to the land of B&W Emerald Cities where they become tangled with the comic intrigues of Prince Kynd (Bryan THE ADVENTURES OF CAPTAIN MARVEL Washburn) and the nefarious Prime Minister Kruel (Josef DICK TRACY'S G-MEN Swickard). Older movie goers may remember Swickard best because of the urban legend which falsely reported him having jumped to his death from the Hollywood hills sign. The 3 farm-hands (Oliver A HAUNTING WE WILL GO Hardy, director Semon & black actor 'Snowball' Spencer TAXI SPOOKS Bell) disguise themselves as a Tin Woodsman, a Scarecrow and a Cowardly Lion respectively. The part of The Wizard went to Charles Murray who starred in a string of silent era THE COHENS AND KELLYS comedies. It's not the worst version of THE WIZARD OF OZ I've ever seen; that still goes to Shawn Cassidy for EMERALD CITY but it's not easy to like either. Hardy's character especially feels nothing like what we remembered from the books. Junior almost went broke making THE WIZARD OF OZ which proved to be as poorly received as the 3 adaptations which forced his father's The Oz Film Manufacturing Company to file for chapter 11 a decade before. There are those among us who insist the Judy Garland classic is a remake but those two films barely exist in the same cinematic universe IMO despite the genetic material shared by their authors. Baum Jr. would try his hand again at re-writing the 1900 best-seller as a 1933 cartoon short.
- DirectorWilliam NighStarsBoris KarloffGrant WithersMaxine JenningsIn San Francisco, Simon Dayton, the senior partner in a chemical company, visits famed detective James Lee Wong as Dayton fears for his life stemming from a series of unexplained events in both his personal and professional life. But before Wong can meet Dayton at his office the next morning to follow up, Dayton is found dead in his locked office, the cause eventually discovered to be by poison. Captain Sam Street with the SFPD leads the investigation. The primary suspect is Carl Roemer, the scientist who developed the poison which he accused Dayton of stealing from him as he was never paid for the formula. One of the initial questions is how Dayton was poisoned behind the locked doors of his office. While Street takes the path of least resistance in the investigation in believing Roemer the obvious killer based solely on circumstantial evidence, more thoughtful Wong takes a broader approach in trying not only to discover other suspects, but how whoever the killer was able to administer the poison. Two of those other primary suspects are Dayton's partners, Theodore Meisle and Christian Wilk, who stand to profit substantially from Dayton's death, in addition to Dayton, Meisle and Wilk's many employees and associates. Adding to the investigation is Street's sometime girlfriend, Myra Ross, who nonetheless respects Wong's take on the investigation more than Street's in looking out for the proverbial little guy.Horror icon Boris FRANKENSTEIN Karloff and director William BLACK DRAGONS Nigh collaborated on 5 Monogram features based on the exploits on fictional US Treasury Agent James Lee Wong. The Chinese detective was created by Hugh Riley who published 20 short stories in Collier's Magazine. Earl Derr Biggers; the creator of the similar CHARLIE CHAN character died a few years earlier and studios & publishers were hoping to fill the void with these new stories by Wiley and also the popular MR. MOTO series John Marquand began in 1937. The others Wong films the pair made following the initial success of MR. WONG, DETECTIVE include THE MYSTERY OF MR. WONG, MR. WONG IN CHINATOWN, THE FATAL HOUR and DOOMED TO DIE. After Karloff abandoned the character a final 6th film was produced with Keye Luke cast in the lead. Wong and his right hand on the force; Captain Street (Grant FORT APACHE Withers) investigate the assassination of a chemical manufacturer. Suspects include business associates played by William BUCK ROGERS Gould, Hooper G-MEN VS THE BLACK DRAGONS Atchley & Wilber MA AND PA KETTLE Mack. The mystery (screenplay by Houston SIOUX BLOOD Branch) is reasonably well designed and should keep you guessing for this B-movie's brief run-time but that low budget is problematic. B&W
- DirectorWilliam NighStarsBoris KarloffGrant WithersDorothy TreeDetective tries to solve the murder of antiques collector who was in possession of a famous jewel known as "The Eye of the Daughter of The Moon."Scott THE GHOST OF FRANKENSTEIN Darling wrote this remake of his own 1931 pre-code mystery MURDER AT MIDNIGHT tailored to include Hugh Wiley's popular Oriental detective James Lee Wong whose stories were serialized in Collier's Magazine. Fresh off his starring role in THE SON OF FRANKENSTEIN, Boris Karloff offered the 2nd of 5 restrained performances as the observant sleuth under the direction of William THE APE Nigh for Poverty Row studio Monogram. Karloff took some heat a few years earlier for his overly-flamboyant interpretation of Fu Manchu. Wong is considerably toned down by comparison. THE MYSTERY OF MR. WONG opens with a wealthy businessman (Morgan CHARLIE CHAN AT THE OLYMPICS Wallace) appealing to Inspector Street (Grant THE WHITE SQUAW Withers) & his renowned Treasury Agent acquaintance to look into a death threat associated with a priceless stolen sapphire. The gem carries a Chinese curse whose significance is known to the suspicious servants (Chester MAN MADE MONSTER Gan, Lotus MYSTERIOUS MR. MOTO Long). They're not surprised when their master is shot dead. The identity of the accused killer is a surprise. The secretary (Craig THE STRANGE AFFAIR OF UNCLE HENRY Reynolds) couldn't have possibly done it! Holmes BOSTON BLACKIE AT BAY Herbert, Hooper DICK TRACY VS CRIME INC. Atchley & Dorothy CONFESSIONS OF A NAZI SPY Tree co-starred in this passable B-Movie as potential suspects. Immediately sequeled by MR. WONG IN CHINATOWN. B&W
- DirectorWilliam NighStarsBoris KarloffMarjorie ReynoldsGrant WithersA pretty Chinese woman, seeking help from San Francisco detective James Lee Wong, is killed by a poisoned dart in his front hall, having time only to scrawl "Captain J" on a sheet of paper. She proves to be Princess Lin Hwa.Director William THE STRANGE CASE OF DOCTOR RX Nigh and iconic actor Boris THE COHENS AND KELLYS IN HOLLYWOOD Karloff returned for their 3rd consecutive Mr. Wong adventure from Poverty Row studio; Monogram. This B&W B-movie was based on a popular series of mysteries written by Hugh Whiley for Collier's Magazine and adapted by screen-writer Scott SHERLOCK HOLMES AND THE SECRET WEAPON Darling. The famous Treasury agent based in San Francisco investigated the assassination of a Chinese princess who died at his feet with a poison dart sticking from the back of her neck. Princess Lin Hwa (Lotus THINK FAST, MR. MOTO Long) leaves a clue in the form of the letter 'J'. Could she have been referring to Jaime (William FLASH GORDON CONQUERS THE UNIVERSE Royal), Jerry (James ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET THE KILLER BORIS KARLOFF Flavin) or Jackson (George CHARLIE CHAN IN MONTE CARLO Lynn)? In addition to Detective Street (Grant THE GHOST RUNS WILD Withers), Wong is aided by plucky reporter Bobbie Logan (Marjorie BLONDIE GOES TO COLLEGE Reynolds) making her 1st of 3 appearances as Street's love-interest. The Mr. Wong detective franchise fell into public domain decades ago and enjoys a cultish reputation today primarily because of the unmistakable presence of Karloff. MR. WONG IN CHINATOWN was remade as the 1947 Charlie Chan adventure THE CHINESE RING. Up next; THE FATAL HOUR.
- DirectorWilliam NighStarsBoris KarloffMarjorie ReynoldsGrant WithersWhen Captain Street's best friend Dan Grady is murdered, Street receives help from Chinese detective James Lee Wong and local newspaper reporter Bobbie Logan.William ESCAPE FROM HONG KONG Nigh directed this cult classic entry in Monogram Pictures B-movie franchise written by Canadian Scott THE BULLFIGHTER Darling & George Waggner who genre fans know best for the aborted Universal sequel to THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA; THE CLIMAX. Boris ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET DR. JECKYLL AND MR. HYDE Karloff returned for his fourth appearance as the Chinese detective Mr. Wong based on the popular mystery series written by Hugh Wiley. Wong, Detective Street (Grant THE LAST STAGECOACH WEST Withers) & Bobbie Logan (Marjorie TEX RIDES WITH THE BOY SCOUTS Reynolds) begin looking for clues when stolen jewels lead to multiple cases of murder! Handsome Craig PERRY MASON AND THE CASE OF THE BLACK CAT Reynolds who played a man falsely accused of murder in MR. WONG IN CHINATOWN returned for the sequel cast as an entirely new young man falsely accused of murder. His girlfriend Tanya (Lita CHARLIE CHAN'S COURAGE Chavvet) may be hiding something from the sneaky sleuth and I don't like the look of that Forbes character; Charles CHARLIE CHAN A THE WAX MUSEUM Trowbridge. Coming so close on the heels of an entry so similar makes this a bit of a chore to sit through although I didn't hate it. Karloff would reprise the role one last time for DOOMED TO DIE before passing the torch to the most honorable number one son Keye Luke who assumed the part of Wong for PHANTOM OF CHINATOWN. B&W
- DirectorWilliam NighStarsBoris KarloffMarjorie ReynoldsGrant WithersMr. Wong and a girl reporter investigate a shipping magnate's murder.This would be the star and director's final film in the unexceptional B-movie mystery franchise inspired by the short stories published in Collier's Magazine by author Hugh Wiley. MR. WONG was a rip-off of the enormously successful Earl Derr Biggers detective CHARLIE CHAN but never came close to it in popularity or the similar MR. MOTO which always achieved greater prestige in print or production. By the late 1930s Chan was less of a box office draw and 20th Century Fox was losing interest in making more. Monogram couldn't wait to get their hands on the rights to the classic sleuth when they came up for option in 1941. This left the lesser-known Wong somewhat redundant as a property. Monogram would produce PHANTOM OF CHINATOWN with Boris THE TERROR Karloff's role recast before releasing CHARLIE CHAN IN THE SECRET SERVICE in 1945. This would also mark the final appearance of Marjorie TIMBER STAMPEDE Reynolds as Captain Street's plucky love interest Bobbie Logan. The San Francisco cop played by Grant THE YELLOW ROSE OF TEXAS Withers and Karloff's famous Chinese gumshoe are called in to prove the innocence of a young man accused of murder. His fiance (Catherine PARACHUTE NURSE Craig) believes the killing of her father was tied to the sinking of a cruise ship owned by the wealthy family. Actual newsreel footage of the 1934 sinking of the S.S. Morro Castle was used to simulate the downing of the Wentworth family ocean liner. Wong turns to the leader of a powerful Oriental cartel for information leading to the arrest of the real killer. This was Richard Loo's 4th performance in the franchise and his flashiest role yet. Guy KING OF THE ZOMBIES Usher, Wilber MA AND PAKETTLE Mack & Henry WIZARDS OF THE LOST KINGDOM II Brandon also popped up in the cast of this B&W cult item. Ralph PHANTOM OF CHINATOWN Bettison & Michael THE UNDYING MONSTER Jacoby wrote the script for director William THE HOUSE OF MYSTERY Nigh.
- DirectorPhil RosenStarsKeye LukeLotus LongGrant WithersDetective James Lee Wong is on the scene as archaeologist Dr. John Benton, recently returned from an expedition in China where a valuable ancient scroll was recovered, is murdered while giving a lecture on the expedition.From the wonderful Sax Rohmer FU MANCHU adventures to the clever whodunnits featuring author Rovert Van Gulik's JUDGE DEE there was a boom in Oriental heroes & villains across all pulp fiction entertainment circa WWII. Monogram pictures introduced the Chinese super-sleuth James Lee Wong in a series of 6 B-movies beginning with 1938's MR. WONG, DETECTIVE. The cultish character was created by writer Hugh Wiley for Collier Magazine & played over 5 previous installments by Hollywood legend Boris THE OLD DARK HOUSE Karloff. When 20th Century Fox began losing interest in the CHARLIE CHAN franchise due to fading box office receipts & Walter Oland's alcoholism Monogram moved in to secure the rights and moved to retire their own unremarkable knock-off. PHANTOM OF CHINATOWN is on par with the earlier low-budget, B&W adventures and veteran character actor Keye JUDGE DEE AND THE MONOSTARY MURDERS Luke is perfectly fine as the Eastern Treasury Agent and yet it's never as much fun. Luke co-starred as CHARLIE CHAN's #1 son in 8 movies opposite Oland and an additional film in the Lee Chan role for Fox's MR. MOTO'S GAMBLE. Mr. MOTO'S GAMBLE began production as CHARLIE CHAN'S GAMBLE but was scuttled by Oland's alcoholism. That's why Luke got to side-kick for Moto while playing Chan's son. Keye Luke was perfectly fine in all of those films but he was never able to shine as bright as Oland or Peter Lorre who was unforgettable as MR. MOTO. Sadly, no matter how good Luke is in this rare starring role he's still over-shadowed by Karloff who is virtually indistinguishable from Mr. WONG which became a signature performance for the actor. Luke would return to his own iconic part for 2 more Charlie Chan pics after failing to carry the lead in Monogram's PHANTOM OF CHINATOWN. His last appearance as #1 son was for the poverty row's studio's 1949 programmer CHARLIE CHAN AND THE SKY DRAGONS. It wouldn't be till 1972 that Luke got to play his film-father for the obscure Saturday morning cartoon CHARLIE CHAN AND THE CHAN CLAN. A professor named Breton (Charles THE HOUSE OF FRANKENSTEIN Miller) announces the discovery of a massive oil reserve. The proof of his discovery is tied to a scroll detailing the curse of the Eternal Fire found in the tomb of a Mongolian king. Breton is poisoned before location of the oil well can be disclosed leaving Wong and San Francisco's finest; Captain Street (Grant THE VAMPIRE'S GHOST Withers) to solve the murder. Lotus Long guests as the victim's secretary but appeared in 3 prior Wong pics. She also co-starred opposite Bela Lugosi in the unrelated 1938 pic THE MYSTERIOUS MR. WONG. Potential red herrings are provided by Richard THAT GANG OF MINE Terry, Willy DEATH RIDES A RANGE Costello and John THEY SAVED HITLER'S BRAIN Holland. Average.
- DirectorThomas J. ChurchillStarsCody Renee CameronMichael CervantesSheri DavisAs Alyssa and Karla try to escape from the church home that holds them captive, Karla is slaughtered by a vicious, semi-human creature.I complain about the glut of unauthorized Amityville sequels being cranked out in record numbers these days but the problem started with Dino de Laurentis back in 1982. The legendary Italian producer was unwilling to shell out a licensing fee to the Lutz family to secure the rights to THE AMITYVILLE HORROR and instead released AMITYVILLE II: THE POSSESSION as a sort of 'stealth sequel'. Even the posters for his movie and the 1983 flop AMITYVILLE 3D state in the fine print; NOT A SEQUEL!. 1989s AMITYVILLE 4: THE EVIL ESCAPES brought them officially back into the fold. By then the damage had been done. Within a year an obscure Canadian mockbuster THE AMITYVILLE CURSE hit video stores and we've had nothing but trouble since. There must be 30 of these things already only 9 of which are sanctioned. But Amityville is a place name and as such is exempt from copyright protection. Writer/director William BIG FREAKING RAT! Churchhill knows this and has cobbled together a trio of them under contract to LionsGate. What Lionsgate is doing hiring backyarders to manufacture their videos is beyond me. As a consumer it's not unlike how I felt that 1st time a bottle of Vidal Sassoon showed up on a dollar store shelf. THE AMITYVILLE MOON is a rock-bottom werewolf pic that makes THE HOWLING III: THE MARSUPIALS look like AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON by comparison! It's only connection to the previous home video THE AMITYVILLE HARVEST and the announced THE AMITYVILLE RISING is the appearance of Michael COLLEGE COEDS VS ZOMBIE HOUSEWIVES Gaglio as a bartender in all 3. A shoddy looking werewolf is stalking the community of Amityville which is filled with bad actors you've never heard of (Cody WEEDJIES: HALLOWEED NIGHT Renee Cameron, Michael CLOWN FEAR Cervantes, etc.). The rarely employed 80s scream queen Tuesday A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET PART 4: THE DREAM MASTER Knight cameos as a nun who may hold the key to the monster's identity. Ron AMITYVILLE: DOLLHOUSE Knyrim provided the werewolf which looks suspiciously similar to the one he designed for 2011s THE HOWLING REBORN.
- DirectorTrey MurphyStarsChance GibbsMicha Marie StevensTom YoungAfter unexpectedly, and mysteriously, inheriting his estranged grandmother's mansion, Stanley DeFeo finds himself in the small town of Amityville - surrounded by buried family secrets and a sinister plot against him.2017s AMITYVILLE AWAKENING was the 9th entry in the franchise based on the 1977 best-seller THE AMITYVILLE HORROR. AMITYVILLE CULT is the umpteenth unauthorized backyard sequel that's been produced in recent years by folks armed with cell phones and food stamps attempting to get famous by picking the bones of George & Kathy Lutz's infamous hoax. This dull-as-dishwater yarn concerns the diabolical forces influencing a new arrival to the Long Island community. Chance DEADFALL: GROUND ZERO Gibbs plays a descendant of Ronald Defeo (the spree killer who shot-gunned 6 members of his own at family while living at 112 Ocean Avenue in 1974). Defeo has been lured to a sinister inherited estate by a satanic cult looking for human sacrifice. 1st time Writer/director/Production Manager,/Location Manager/Producer/ Trey Murphy plays it very safe. Every shot stolen for AMITYVILLE CULT has worked before in a hundred better horror pics. You'll recognize most of the set ups fairly quickly and also catch on that none of them work. These stolen moments aren't connected and lead nowhere. There's no scary payoff to be had from any of it. Most of the cast & crew wore many hats during this videos creation including actor Eric Oberto. In addition to playing the demonic Asmodeus he worked in production, editing & wrote half the score. Most of the players are currently filming a 2nd low budget feature called THE RED RIVER EXPRESSWAY KILLER which I hope never to see.
- DirectorTerry BeckerStarsJennifer BillingsleyJohn ConsidineJudith McConnellBeautiful young girls are kidnapped off the streets of Manila by a death cult that needs their blood to remain immortal.Jennifer C.C. AND COMPANY Billingsly, Judith SANTA BARBARA McConnell & Fredricka PRETTY MAIDS ALL IN A ROW Meyers play a trio of Manillan go-go dancers who are kidnapped by monks. After kayaking through the sewers the strippers are taken to a paper mache Shangri-la carved out of the side of a mountain. Ranu (Tani DAUGHTERS OF SATAN Guthrie) is the immortal ruler of the cave people who maintain their youth by drinking a magic potion made with the corpuscles of beautiful women. While not traditional vampires these utopian wingnuts do worship a disembodied head floating in a glass cube filled with fake blood. The lovely Billingsly is chosen to join the tribe while her friends are kennelled below after she catches the eye of her kidnapper Beru (John DR. DEATH: SEEKER OF SOULS Considine). Rather than spend eternity with the commune of blood-thirsty hippies she plots her escape! Canadian Charles DOUBLE NEGATIVE Dennis prepped the leisurely paced screenplay based on a story by the obscure Lou WONDER WOMEN Whitehall. VOYAGE TO THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA actor Terry Becker directed this odd horror pic clearly intended as a rip-off of the musical flop LOST HORIZON which was released about the same time. The stock music and swiped score for this unappealing Philippino production was credited to Richard PIRANHA, PIRANHA LaSalle.