Twice a month Joe Lipsett will dissect a new Amityville Horror film to explore how the “franchise” has evolved in increasingly ludicrous directions. This is “The Amityville IP.”
I feel lied to.
While yes, technically Eric Roberts is in 2015’s Amityville Death House, he’s basically hidden under a mask and appears solo for his whole one minute of screen time (Clearly this cameo was filmed separately from the rest of the production and took approximately one hour to complete).
Barring the slightly misleading advertising, the twelfth Amityville film remains weirdly entertaining. It’s not good at all, but there’s something admirable about its “everything-but-the-kitchen-sink” approach to storytelling, which helps to offset the truly terrible acting. Because let’s be real: you can forgive amateur actors if there’s a spider woman in your film’s climax.
Death House marks the first of four Amityville films we’ll discuss from director Mark Polonia,...
I feel lied to.
While yes, technically Eric Roberts is in 2015’s Amityville Death House, he’s basically hidden under a mask and appears solo for his whole one minute of screen time (Clearly this cameo was filmed separately from the rest of the production and took approximately one hour to complete).
Barring the slightly misleading advertising, the twelfth Amityville film remains weirdly entertaining. It’s not good at all, but there’s something admirable about its “everything-but-the-kitchen-sink” approach to storytelling, which helps to offset the truly terrible acting. Because let’s be real: you can forgive amateur actors if there’s a spider woman in your film’s climax.
Death House marks the first of four Amityville films we’ll discuss from director Mark Polonia,...
- 4/12/2023
- by Joe Lipsett
- bloody-disgusting.com
Stars: Samantha Coolidge, Ryan Dalton, Drew Patrick, Houston Baker, A.T. Tomas, Jeff Kirkendall, Cassandra Hayes | Written by John Oak Dalton | Directed by Mark Polonia
[Note: With the film now out on DVD, here’s a reposting of our review of Sand World, formerly Dune World, from its digital review last year]
With Denis Villeneuve’s Dune getting its first festival showings, Mark Polonia, is here to cash in with Sand World. And not only is it bad, but it may also be a new low even by his standards!
After a debate about marriage, “I believe marriage should be between two men and two women.”, the crew of the mining ship Robert Indiana, flying the Martian flag, are struck by a strange energy blast and crash on a desert planet.
Babylon, Kondor (Ryan Dalton; Invasion of the Empire of the Apes), Kidd (Drew Patrick; Return to Splatter Farm), Chafe and Link (A.T. Tomas), an android that needs to go on a diet, trudge along in front of a...
[Note: With the film now out on DVD, here’s a reposting of our review of Sand World, formerly Dune World, from its digital review last year]
With Denis Villeneuve’s Dune getting its first festival showings, Mark Polonia, is here to cash in with Sand World. And not only is it bad, but it may also be a new low even by his standards!
After a debate about marriage, “I believe marriage should be between two men and two women.”, the crew of the mining ship Robert Indiana, flying the Martian flag, are struck by a strange energy blast and crash on a desert planet.
Babylon, Kondor (Ryan Dalton; Invasion of the Empire of the Apes), Kidd (Drew Patrick; Return to Splatter Farm), Chafe and Link (A.T. Tomas), an android that needs to go on a diet, trudge along in front of a...
- 3/11/2022
- by Jim Morazzini
- Nerdly
Stars: Samantha Coolidge, Ryan Dalton, Drew Patrick, Houston Baker, A.T. Tomas, Jeff Kirkendall, Cassandra Hayes | Written by John Oak Dalton | Directed by Mark Polonia
With Denis Villeneuve’s Dune getting its first festival showings, Mark Polonia, is here to cash in with Dune World. And not only is it bad, but it may also be a new low even by his standards!
After a debate about marriage, “I believe marriage should be between two men and two women.”, the crew of the mining ship Robert Indiana, flying the Martian flag, are struck by a strange energy blast and crash on a desert planet.
Babylon, Kondor (Ryan Dalton; Invasion of the Empire of the Apes), Kidd (Drew Patrick; Return to Splatter Farm), Chafe and Link (A.T. Tomas), an android that needs to go on a diet, trudge along in front of a green screen until they find a plastic...
With Denis Villeneuve’s Dune getting its first festival showings, Mark Polonia, is here to cash in with Dune World. And not only is it bad, but it may also be a new low even by his standards!
After a debate about marriage, “I believe marriage should be between two men and two women.”, the crew of the mining ship Robert Indiana, flying the Martian flag, are struck by a strange energy blast and crash on a desert planet.
Babylon, Kondor (Ryan Dalton; Invasion of the Empire of the Apes), Kidd (Drew Patrick; Return to Splatter Farm), Chafe and Link (A.T. Tomas), an android that needs to go on a diet, trudge along in front of a green screen until they find a plastic...
- 9/21/2021
- by Jim Morazzini
- Nerdly
Stars: Danielle Donahue, Jeff Kirkendall, Bob Dennis, James Carolus, Steve Diasparra, Ken Van Sant, Todd Carpenter, Austin Dragovich, Laurie Smith, Frank Humes, Houston Baker | Written by John Oak Dalton | Directed by Mark Polonia
I’m not going to lie, the oeuvre of the Polonia Brothers is somewhat of an acquired taste. Always low budget, often made with recurring cast and crew, very much what you’d call Diy filmmaking – right down to using familiar stock music and stock video footage (tell me you don’t recognise this films blood-drip filled opening credits? I’ve seen it offered as a design from tons of “video editors” on Fiverr). You have been warned… But for those familiar with the Polonia’s work, Jurassic Prey is more of the same cheesy fun that you’ve come to expect!
Jurassic Prey, originally released on Full Moon’s streaming service under the title of Meateaters,...
I’m not going to lie, the oeuvre of the Polonia Brothers is somewhat of an acquired taste. Always low budget, often made with recurring cast and crew, very much what you’d call Diy filmmaking – right down to using familiar stock music and stock video footage (tell me you don’t recognise this films blood-drip filled opening credits? I’ve seen it offered as a design from tons of “video editors” on Fiverr). You have been warned… But for those familiar with the Polonia’s work, Jurassic Prey is more of the same cheesy fun that you’ve come to expect!
Jurassic Prey, originally released on Full Moon’s streaming service under the title of Meateaters,...
- 4/28/2017
- by Phil Wheat
- Nerdly
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