Peter Cook: Michael Rimmer
Photos
Quotes
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Michael Rimmer : [schmoozing] Hugh, I loved your speech on abortion. It was really gorgeous.
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Priest : Have you been able to find time for the survey in regard to the declining attendance in England's churches?
Michael Rimmer : Yes, we have.
Priest : We've tried everything, you know... cutthroat bingo, hallucinogens in the wafers, neon lights for the graveyards, chapels on wheels, fifty-fifty drawings after communion...
Michael Rimmer : Really?
Priest : [grabbing hold of his vestments] And these clothes are a bit out-of-date for the 1960s.
Michael Rimmer : Yes, well, we've done a great deal of research on the results of our religious polls and I believe we have discovered the true root of the problem.
Priest : What would that be?
Michael Rimmer : God.
Priest : I had a nasty suspicion it was that.
Michael Rimmer : It's just that people have a hard time believing in Him. So, get rid of the God and you'll do just fine.
Priest : Interesting. Sort of an "Our Father who *might be* in heaven"...
Michael Rimmer : Yes, very good.
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Michael Rimmer : [after seeing Fromage faint] What's the matter with Fromage?
Pumer : Oh, these recent sex surveys have him worn out.
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Michael Rimmer : Don't worry Tom, we'll supply the tears.
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Michael Rimmer : Peter, I was just jotting down a few reasons why you might want to leave IOP and come over to us at the Fairburn Organisation.
[hands over cheque]
Peter Niss : Oh yes, I see, that's very well put. Yes, I particularly like the noughts.
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Patricia Cartwright : I've got the Olympic Heats tomorrow.
Michael Rimmer : I've got the Olympic Heats tonight.
