- Charles Whelan: [watching a rat in a maze] He looks just like one of my junior editors!
- Dr. Anita Borden: We call her Willy.
- Charles Whelan: Sorry, I don't have a Willy.
- Man doctor at party: You know, I find this absolutely fascinating. Do you have, uh, an interesting investigation you've been involved with? We'd love to hear about something like that.
- Second man doctor at party: Yeah!
- Woman Doctor at Party: Yeah!
- Columbo: I think that the most interesting investigation is always the one that you're working on at the moment.
- Dr. Mark Collier: [to Columbo] You know something, Lieutenant? You're a marvelously deceptive man. You know, the way you get to the point without really getting to the point.
- Sergeant George Kramer: You got a European car?
- Columbo: That's a French car. Yeah, my car's a French car.
- Columbo: That's right, Doctor. That man that you saw was blind... and is blind. This is Daniel Morris. That's the man that you saw on the road Monday afternoon. This other man is his brother, David. I'm sure you can see the problem, sir. There is no way in the world that you could've assumed that this man, this witness was blind unless, of course, you had seen this man that day. That's the only way you could've known. Thank you.
- David Morris: You're welcome.
- Columbo: I have an eyewitness, Doctor Collier. An eyewitness that will place you at the head of the Donner driveway at 5:30 Monday afternoon, but the eyewitness is not Mr. Morris, the eyewitness is you.
- Columbo: What kind of place is this? What do they do here?
- Dr. Anita Borden: You really wanna know? Basically, we're concerned with the measurement and manipulation of human behavior - at all levels.
- David Morris: Always pack a bulky sweater and some heavy underwear. Even in the spring, the mountains can get pretty cold at night.