Meanwhile, Back at the Ranch (1976)

Pat Buttram: Narrator

Quotes 

• Narrator : Well, you can read about it in them history books, hear about it in songs, but, if you really want to know how it happened, you better come and ask Pat Buttram. I know, because I was there. In fact, I was the one who sent for them 25 hard-ridin', two-fisted troubleshooters. I'd have took care of The Rattler myself single-handed, man-to-man, 'cept I didn't want to jeopardize the lives of innocent townspeople. They was already in trouble clear up to their suspenders.

• Narrator : Meanwhile, back at the ranch, more of my men were arrivin'. Some came in answer to the call of justice and same came to the call of...

  [camera focuses on a beautiful woman] 

  Narrator : ...other reasons.

• Narrator : Now, I could see right through The Rattler's scheme 'cause Tom Wilson and Autry's dad was double-first cousins of Tex's mother's nephew. So I knew right away we would need all the help we could get.

• Narrator : Well, we really showed 'em how the bear goes through the buckwheat - but we had tipped our hand. Now we had to gather evidence fast and we used every possible means, even including, well...

  [Miss Joyce looks coyly at the camera] 

  Narrator : ...every possible means.

• Narrator : Everybody joined in and we really laid it on 'em. 'Course, I wasn't there - I knew we had 'em and I was back at the ranch getting' the paperwork ready for the trial. And without me doin' the coordinatin' things got pretty confusin' as to who was what...

  [one of the cowboy heroes leaps onto a figure and prepares to pummel him only to discover the man he's knocked down is actually a young woman] 

• [last lines] 

  Narrator : And so Peaceful Valley was peaceful once more, thanks to our great cowboy heroes - and me. We cut the tail off the Rattler... or did we?

  [scene cuts to the Rattler preparing to blow up a safe with dynamite] 

  Narrator : Oh no! Hey, boys, come back! Gene! Roy! Buck! Hoppy! He's alive! Come back! Monte! Hoot! Rex! Help! He's still alive! We need you! Andy! Smiley! Where are you...?

• Narrator : I remember how happy we was when that first lawman rode into town. You could tell he was a lawman - he was ridin' a clean horse.

• Narrator : Back in town somethin' was cookin' and it wasn't chicken - it was trouble.