Family Ties (1982–1989)
Michael Gross: Steven Keaton, Steven Richard Keaton, Jean-Paul Sartre, Sigmund Freud, Thomas Jefferson, William Shakespeare
Photos
Quotes
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Steven Keaton : [walks into the kitchen] What's this?
Elyse Keaton : Andrew drew it. It's a picture of a dog. I told him that he couldn't have a dog because Mallory is allergic to dogs.
Steven Keaton : What's this?
Elyse Keaton : It's a picture of Mallory moving away.
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Andrew Keaton : Alex is reading me "Robin Hood," where he robs from the poor and gives to the rich.
Steven Keaton : That's not Robin Hood, that's Ronald Reagan.
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Mallory Keaton : Dad, Alex, this is Jamie Carter.
Alex P. Keaton : Aaaaah!
[jumps into his father's arms]
Steven Keaton : It's okay, Alex. She said Jamie, not Jimmy.
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[drunken Ned throws newspaper clipping in the fireplace]
Alex P. Keaton : Hey, don't do that. Here give me those.
Ned Donnelly : Leave me alone!
Alex P. Keaton : Give me those!
Ned Donnelly : [screaming] LEAVE ME ALONE!
[slaps Alex]
Steven Keaton : What the hell are you doing?
Ned Donnelly : I don't know. I don't know. I'm sorry. Sorry, Alex.
[Ned cries]
Steven Keaton : [quietly, but furious] All right, Ned. That's it. It's over. Right now, either you get some help... or you get the hell outta my house.
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Steven Keaton : I can't wait to try this Pasta Alex, Alex.
[Speaks with womanly voice]
Alex P. Keaton : I love a man with a healthy appetite.
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Nick Moore : We can walk on coals / Have ninjas fight us / Just don't get gingivitis.
Steven Keaton : [later as he's sleeping] We can walk on coals / Have ninjas fight us/ Just don't get gingivitis.
[wakes up]
Steven Keaton : Elyse, I had a nightmare. I dreamed I was Nick.
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Steven Keaton : [walks into the kitchen] What's this?
Elyse Keaton : Andrew drew it. It's a picture of a dog. I told him that he couldn't have a dog because Malory is allergic to dogs.
Steven Keaton : What's this?
Elyse Keaton : It's a picture of Malory moving away.
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Steven : [reading from a card given to him by Alex] "Alex is more than a son. He's a companion, a friend, whom I can spend many long hours with discussing the economy, world events and politics." Alex, if I read this out loud, I'm afraid I'll be struck by lightning.
[Alex nods towards Elyse]
Elyse Keaton : [reading from her card] Mom, please read the "Alex is more than a son" speech, if dad refuses.
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Steven Keaton : I love you, Elyse.
Elyse Keaton : No, I love you more, Steven.
[Elyse and Steven make kissy noises through the telephone]
Alex P. Keaton : [shouting from upstairs] Oh, for crying... will you hang up the phone?
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Elyse Keaton : Don't you remember? We said we were going to be creative this year and make gifts instead of spending a lot of money Christmas shopping.
Steven Keaton : Well, I know we said it, I just didn't know we meant it.
