Toughlove (1985 TV Movie) User Reviews

Lee Remick's luminous presence makes this one worth checking out...

[Isaac5855 · 7/10 · 23 January 2009]

A charismatic and heartbreaking performance by the late Lee Remick is the centerpiece of TOUGHLOVE, a relative interesting 1985 TV-movie, originally aired on ABC, that is made to be much better than it is because of Lee Remick's performance. Remick and Bruce Dern play upper middle class suburbanites who are at their wits' end regarding how to handle their teenage son, whose drug addiction has his life spiraling out of control and is slowly and methodically destroying their family. Having tried everything thing else, the couple turn to an organization called Tough Love, which teaches parents to go on the offensive with out of control children: If your child is constantly staying out past his curfew, lock the front door at curfew and put the dead bolt on or if your child gets arrested, don't bail him out, let him experience the consequences of his actions. This film chronicles the couples' initial reluctance to be so harsh with their child but soon learn that Tough Love is the only thing that affects their son's behavior. Remick is the conflicted mother, torn between wanting her baby home with her and knowing that as long as she continues to baby her son, he will never change. The scene where they learn their son is in jail and refuse to bail him out is sad and brilliant. Dern and especially Remick give superb performances as does a young Jason Patric as their troubled son, Gary. Despite an ending that's a cop out, this is pretty compelling stuff for most of the ride, thanks primarily to the work of the amazing Lee Remick.

It is not easy to be parents

[pneuma2019 · 7/10 · 29 July 1999]

I saw this film in the classroom. I am doubting about the parental style of the parents. However, I still not be a parent so I can not say anything. I think more and more parents meet the situation but not know how to face it. I do not think it is the best way as the movie show but it can let you think how to face your teenage child.

It's better to just say "no"!

[emm · 6/10 · 15 January 1999]

Here's one of my "Schoolhouse Cinema" attractions! I saw this film twice in my middle to high school years. Twice, I did writing assignments for my health / phys. ed. classes about it! Isn't it ironic, don't you think? Turning back the clock when I was in my teens, TOUGHLOVE had expressed a specific point about teenagers who become enraged following incidents of drug use. At that time, folks my age needed plenty of motivation and awareness, since the movie was based on a plaguing and rising epidemic in modern society. ANGEL DUSTED would probably be another example of 80s accounts. This one is alright as a made-for-TV movie that centers around a discussion forum for parents whose kids are temper-tantrumed by drugs. There are some levels of hope, suffering, and anger, but it doesn't provide enough emotional values to make this a "serious" drama. The best thing you can prove about TOUGHLOVE is the parents who grieve and concern over a son once perfectly normal. In the end, despite all troubles, the son and his family all live happily ever after. Consider showing this one to your sons or daughters who could someday become drug addicts without warning. Still, this is strictly entertainment fare, and not something a health organization would present.

two ways to view it

[alvink · 6 August 2004]

as a TV-type movie, this one is not bad at all. it is without a doubt OK late night autumn-rainy weekend fare that you don't have to feel ashamed about after watching it. no particularly memorable technical stuff, but nothing too irritating, either. bruce is bruce, and he's enough in this case.

that's one way to look at this movie.

the other way to look at it is to admit this movie into the small but growing number of movies that try to address and educate about the growing world-wide problem of addiction.

taking it as such, and comparing it with others of this ilk, 'days of wine and roses', 'the earl manigault story', and 'family secrets- the suzanne somers story', this movie scores high, and deserves, yes, begs to be seen.

i'm trying to say that this movie is acceptable fare on a rainy autumn evening for anyone except the most fanatical purists. (hey, citizen kane, it ain't, and never wanted to be)

but if you have any questions at all about addictions of any type, this is a movie that you should see. it won't pretend to solve your problems, and it will give you good things to think about.

alvin

A suburban "Hud" for the 80s

[khaosjr · 7/10 · 6 October 2004]

The story is, basically, a suburban-based update of "Hud" for the 1980s...well-written, but much too pro-conformity. Essentially, Jason Patric and DeeDee Pfeiffer share the Paul Newman role; Bruce Dern and Piper Laurie share Melvyn Douglas's role; Lee Remick has Patricia Neal's; and Eric Schiff is in Brandon De Wilde's. The biggest differences between "Hud" and "Toughlove" are as follows: the latter's happy ending seems somehow forced and thus phony; Patric and Pfeiffer pop pills in addition to getting drunk and joy-riding. The worst aspect of "Toughlove" is that, like the similar "Not My Kid," the script makes the mistake of treating drug addiction like a moral weakness...rather than like a disease, which it actually is.

Whose parents are these??

[culwin · 4/10 · 6 January 1999]

This movie has a good concept, but... these have to be the dumbest parents in the entire world! Instead of what it is supposed to show, troubled/problem kids, this movie is about parents who don't have a clue. I don't know about the people who read this database, but if I did some of the stuff the kids do in this movie, my parents wouldn't have hesitated to move my stuff onto the front yard - these parents buy their kid a car! The sad part is that there are parents like this. No wonder the world is so screwed up. Anyhow, skip this movie unless you are a totally clueless parent who needs to learn how to deal with crazy kids.

Timely Toughlove

[myrealitybites · 8/10 · 3 May 2009]

I never anticipated at the time I caught this movie in a nocturnal state back in January 1999 on TBS that it would resonate with me so much, particularly at that time. Only two days prior, as a Gary Charters-like teenager myself, I had gotten into trouble with the law due to my reckless (youthful?) behaviour one winter's night after I had drank too much and had possession of the family vehicle.

When I watched it the first time, I felt even more guilty about the wrong I had done, and was even more frightened to tell my parents because I was afraid they'd change the locks on the door too and render me, for that time and for the foreseeable future, homeless. It was hard enough dealing with breaking the law within myself, someone who'd never been at the principal's office, at least not for anything I'd ever done. I truly thought I'd ruined my future, my life.

I could relate to Gary (Jason Patric) somewhat, though my choice of self-medication was booze and not drugs, as if that really makes any difference because underlying factors existed either way. Gary tells his folks (Lee Remick and Bruce Dern) near the end that he hated the way he felt. I could relate. This seems to cut to the heart of why Gary was acting so rebelliously, so recklessly, even if what he hated feeling, what he was going through inside exactly, wasn't revealed.

Even if the method of dealing with Gary was unorthodox, this "Toughlove" support group that Jan (Remick) joined to help her cope with Gary and to help her as she and Rob (Dern) weren't seeing eye to eye re: Gary, a group that Rob resisted, showed nonetheless that being tough on your kid like they were (taking his car away, locking him out, etc.) was the best thing they could do to bring him back to them, which after all the crisis and heartache, is exactly what happened. Coddling won't do it. Luckily, my folks weren't this tough on me, but yet, I didn't put them through the continual hell Gary put his folks through. Remick, in particular, heartbreakingly conveyed the anguish these parents went through as their son battled his demons.

This TV movie is now quite dated, of course, being almost 25 years old. I bought a copy on eBay and watched it several more times in the few years after I first saw it in 1999. I think there should have been a soundtrack to accompany its release on VHS as there are some killer 80's tracks featured throughout, most notably Night Ranger's "Sister Christian" and Peter Wolf's "Lights Out" (which unlike "Sister Christian", played when Gary's girlfriend is seducing him, is not the original recording?). Clearly, I watched it too much, and I am sure primarily to admire Lee Remick's beauty, as she got more beautiful and charming with age.

I am not saying that this is the Citizen Kane of television movies, but it had an effect on me, and I am certain on others, particularly on young people (and their worried, distraught parents), who watched it when it originally aired in 1985, and on those like me who watched it in the years after.

It's a solid 8/10.

Best movie ever

[acarlson2 · 10/10 · 22 October 2005]

This movie is quite possibly the funniest thing ever to an adolescent boy. My middle school heath teacher had a copy of this and we'd make our substitute teachers play it every time. The scene were Gary(the main, drug-addicted, character) gets caught with what looks like an oz. of shwag weed is HYSTERICAL. Best movie ever. Gary's descent into drug addicting is completely unreasonable. He goes from smoking around a joint per day and living with his parents, to sleeping on dirty towels in a run-down apartment with a huge coke habit, in what seems like days.

"I have one question. Why are you way over there?" -Gary (Jason Patrick)