Have I Got News for You (1990– )
Frank Skinner: Self, Self - Guest Presenter, Self - Guest Captain
Photos
Quotes
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Frank Skinner : I saw Vera Lynne once and she said "I don't think anyone else could have a career like mine because Wars these days, they don't last long enough." I remember thinking it's not a complaint you hear often.
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Frank Skinner : What is the fastest growing language in the UK?
Ian Hislop : Emoji!
Frank Skinner : It is Emoji.
Ian Hislop : In which I happen to be fluent.
Guest : Oh! Laughing face laughing face crying face poo?
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Frank Skinner : Only in Yorkshire!
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Frank Skinner : Bees shown to be the first insects to understand the concept of what?
Ian Hislop : Brexit?
Guest : Nectar Points?
Frank Skinner : Zero.
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Frank Skinner : I like the fact that he's Oleg, and he's an Oligarch!
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Paul Merton : I smell rehearsal!
Frank Skinner : First time I've smelt it tonight!
Paul Merton : First time since 1990!
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Frank Skinner : American Fox Network were the first to report that Wayne Rooney was leaving his sports club: "Later, wankers!"
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Frank Skinner : So he cheats on his wife with Whores, he leaves his team for money and he wants to lecture us on loyalty!
Reginald D. Hunter : Hey Frank, take a minute!
Frank Skinner : I'll be alright in a bit.
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Frank Skinner : And in Doncaster, Mrs Ivy Hinchley still hasn't come home from the Bingo.
[Expectant Cat]
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Frank Skinner : At last someone could go to prison for mime.
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Frank Skinner : The Duke of Edinburgh's men were waiting in the wrong tunnel! Sorry, I couldn't think of a mime.
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Frank Skinner : This is Lightening the Owl who's in love with a Mop.
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Frank Skinner : What was Simon Cowell's response to Bruce Forsythe?
Paul Merton : I'm not gay!
Ian Hislop : Has everyone given up mime?
Paul Merton : I can't do that one on my own!
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Host : Space smells like what?
Frank Skinner : Does it smell like Uranus?
[a deathly hush descends]
Ian Hislop : You ought to be ashamed of yourself!
Frank Skinner : I'm so terribly sorry!