Canadian Bacon (1995)

John Candy: Sheriff Bud Boomer

Photos 

Quotes 

• Boomer : There's a time to think, and a time to act. And this, gentlemen, is no time to think.

• [the Mountie explains that Honey has been taken to the capital] 

  Boomer : The capital, Toronto.

  RCMP Officer at Headquarters : No, the capital of Canada is Ottawa.

  Boomer : [laughing]  Yeah, right. Do we look that stupid? Ottawa!

  Roy Boy : Nice try, Dudley.

• [Highway patrolman tells Boomer why his graffiti must be in both English and French] 

  Highway Patrolman : Le Quebecois.

  Boomer : Huh?

  Highway Patrolman : You know. Wine drinkers. Pea soup eaters. French Canadians!

• Roy Boy : You ever see The Dirty Dozen?

  Boomer : That was a cool movie.

  Roy Boy : Man, that was real cool.

  Boomer : Lee Marvin, Charles Bronson, Ernest Borgnine...

  Kabral : Jim Brown.

  Roy Boy : Uh, Telly Savalas, Clint Walker...

  Kabral : Jim Brown.

  Boomer : Trini Lopez!

  Roy Boy : Cool.

  Kabral : Trini Lopez? I never could figure that one out, man. What in the hell was he doing in The Dirty Dozen, man? If I was putting together a group of murderers and cutthroats, Trini Lopez would not be in the starting lineup.

  Boomer : That's why he dies first.

  Roy Boy : Yeah, don't they all die?

  Boomer : They all don't die.

  Kabral : Jim Brown dies.

  Roy Boy : Hey man, what do you expect? Of all The Dirty Dozen, this black guy's supposed to sneak in behind enemy lines and pretend he was a Kraut? Huh?

  Boomer : Uh-huh?

  Kabral : That's not it, man. It's just the black guy always dies. Think about it, man. Unforgiven, Alien, Rocky 4, The Shining...

  Roy Boy : Star Trek 2, Forrest Gump, Witness...

  Boomer : Annie Hall! Not Annie Hall...

  Roy Boy : No, Night Of The Living Dead.

  Boomer : That's the one!

  Kabral : And what about that brother in Jurassic Park, man?

  Roy Boy : Oh, that was cool.

  Boomer : There was two black guys who died in that one! That was a twofer! You must be really pissed off at that one!

  Kabral : I'm telling you, man. The black guy always dies first.

• Roy Boy : I want to call the American embassy!

  Boomer : All I said was "Canadian beer sucks!"

  [riot intensifies] 

  Kabral : People! People! Can't we all just get along?

• Boomer : If life hands you a lemon, you gotta crush it into lemonade.

• Boomer : There it is, men. Toronto.

  Roy Boy : It's beautiful. Like no other city I've ever seen. It's like Albany. Only cleaner.

• Boomer : I'll tell ya another thing: their beer sucks!

• Boomer : There's not a locked door in the whole country.

• RCMP Officer at Headquarters : Welcome to Canada.

  Boomer : Hold it right there, Canuck!

  RCMP Officer at Headquarters : Who are you?

  Boomer : I'm your worst nightmare. I'm a citizen with a constitutional right to bear arms!

• Boomer : All right. Enough of this Dirty Dozen stuff.

  [pause] 

  Boomer : Hey, did anyone see "Dirty Dancing"? Now that was a good movie.

• Boomer : Y'know, it's a free country. If he doesn't like it here, he can swim across the river to Canada. Lotta work there.

• Highway Patrolman : Ah, Americans. Welcome to Ontario, sportsman's paradise!

  Boomer : Isn't it though.

• Boomer : What about Jurassic Park? Two black guys died in that movie. That's a twofer!