Bicentennial Man (1999)

Oliver Platt: Rupert Burns

Photos 

Quotes 

• Rupert Burns : What do they say?

  Andrew Martin : That you can lose yourself. Everything. All boundaries. All time. That two bodies can become so mixed up, that you don't know who's who or what's what. And just when the sweet confusion is so intense you think you're gonna die... you kind of do. Leaving you alone in your separate body, but the one you love is still there. That's a miracle. You can go to heaven and come back alive. You can go back anytime you want with the one you love.

  Rupert Burns : And you want to experience that?

  Andrew Martin : Oh, yes, please.

  Rupert Burns : So do I.

• [Andrew has transfused blood into his system] 

  Rupert Burns : Galatea, my dear, where are we?

  Galatea : The transfusion is almost complete.

  Rupert Burns : Is that so?

  [to Andrew] 

  Rupert Burns : Just goes to show you, Andrew - somebody becomes a human being, sooner or later, they do something monumentally stupid.

  Andrew Martin : You've been a great example, Rupert. How quickly will the blood degrade my system?

  Rupert Burns : Oh, I don't know. You exercise, eat right, I'd say 30, 40 years.

  Andrew Martin : That's a little vague, chief. You don't know exactly how long I'll last?

  Rupert Burns : Sorry.

  [puts his hand on Andrew's shoulder] 

  Rupert Burns : Welcome to the human condition.

• Andrew Martin : What a piece of fecal matter.

  Rupert Burns : Shit.

  Andrew Martin : Excuse me?

  Rupert Burns : What a piece of shit.

  Andrew Martin : I know that.

  Rupert Burns : No, that's what you say when you're frustrated. You say, "piece of shit."

  Andrew Martin : "Piece of shit"?

  Rupert Burns : Yes, but with feeling.

  Andrew Martin : Oh. What a piece of shit.

  Rupert Burns : More.

  Andrew Martin : What a piece of shit!

• [Galatea is forcefully throwing large suitcases of equipment onto a stack] 

  Rupert Burns : Galatea, could you be a little more careful? That's very delicate equipment.

  Galatea : [sarcastically]  Sorry.

  [Galatea picks up another large suitcase and drops it] 

  Rupert Burns : [shocked]  What are you doing?

  Galatea : [annoyed]  Near as I can tell, your bitch work!

  Rupert Burns : My what?

  Galatea : [very annoyed]  Oh you heard me! And I'm sick of it! All day long it's, "Yes Rupert, sir! No Rupert, sir! Would you like another beverage Rupert sir?" And it chaps my ass! So here's a helpful hint for you: SHUT UP AND LET ME DO MY WORK!

  [Galatea menacingly points at Rupert with both robotic index fingers and knocks over the remaining suitcases as Rupert frantically searches his pockets for Galatea's personality chip which Andrew had secretly removed] 

  Galatea : [casually]  I'm done.

• Galatea : [singing loudly]  If I only had a heart! Picture me a balcony...

  [goes offscreen] 

  Andrew Martin : [irritated, but not showing it]  Do you have an impact drill?

  Rupert Burns : Yeah. Over on a rack.

  Andrew Martin : Thank you.

  [goes offscreen and starts the drill as Galatea screams]