Meet the Parents (2000)
Teri Polo: Pam Byrnes
Photos
Quotes
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[Jack's Poem]
Jack Byrnes : "My Mother", by Jack Byrnes. You gave me life / You gave me milk / You gave me courage / Your name was Angela / The angel from Heaven / But you were also an angel of God / And He needed you, too / Selfishly I tried to keep you here / While the cancer ate away your organs, / Like an unstoppable rebel force / But I couldn't save you / and I shall see your face nevermore, nevermore, nevermore / Until we meet in heaven.
Pam Byrnes : Dad, that's beautiful.
Dina Byrnes : It always gets me.
Greg Focker : That's amazing, so much love, and also so much information.
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Pam Byrnes : Geez, Dad. You ever think of knocking?
Jack Byrnes : Not in my own den. What are you two doing in here?
Larry : I'd say rounding 2nd base.
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Pam Byrnes : Greg honey, how are you doing?
Greg Focker : Oh great, considering I desecrated your Grandma's remains, found out you were engaged, and had your father ask me to milk him.
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Pam Byrnes : You never told me about your cat milking days in Motown.
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Pam Byrnes : Take it easy on the sarcasm. Humor is entirely wasted on my parents.
Greg Focker : What are they... Amish?
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Greg Focker : Does he hook all your boyfriends up to his little machine?
Pam Byrnes : Well, he doesn't need a machine. He's a human lie detector.
Greg Focker : What?
Pam Byrnes : Greg, my father was never in the rare flower business. That was just his cover. He was in the C.I.A. for 34 years.
Greg Focker : How could you not tell me this?
Pam Byrnes : I wanted to, honey, but it was strictly on a "need-to-know" basis.
Greg Focker : So, what? He's in the C.I.A.? He was a spy? He is a spy?
Pam Byrnes : No, he was more like a psychological profiler. They used him to interrogate suspected double agents in the company.
Greg Focker : Oh yea. That's great. I was scared of your dad back when I thought he was a florist. It's wonderful to know that I've actually got a C.I.A. spy-hunter on my ass.
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[Greg is sitting in the dark. Pam walks in to check on him]
Pam Byrnes : What's the matter sweetie? Can't sleep?
Greg Focker : No, no. I was just going over my answers to the polygraph test your dad just gave me.
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Pam Byrnes : I love you, Dad, but you can be a real jerk sometimes.
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Pam Byrnes : Hey, listen, be nice to this one, okay? I kinda like him.