Napoleon Dynamite (2004)

Efren Ramirez: Pedro

Photos 

Quotes 

• Pedro : Do you think people will vote for me?

  Napoleon Dynamite : Heck yes! I'd vote for you.

  Pedro : Like what are my skills?

  Napoleon Dynamite : Well, you have a sweet bike. And you're really good at hooking up with chicks. Plus you're like the only guy at school who has a mustache.

• Pedro : Vote for me, and all your wildest dreams will come true.

• Napoleon Dynamite : [referring to the dance]  Who are you gonna ask?

  Pedro : That girl over there.

  Napoleon Dynamite : Summer Wheatly? How the heck are you gonna do that?

  Pedro : Build her a cake or something.

• Napoleon Dynamite : Why do you got your hood on like that?

  Pedro : Well, when I came home from school my head started to get really hot. So I drank some cold water, but it didn't do nothing. So I laid in the bathtub for a while, but then I realized that it was my hair that was making my head hot. So I went into my kitchen and I shaved it all off. I don't want anyone to see.

  Napoleon Dynamite : I know what you mean.

• Napoleon Dynamite : What kind of bike do you have?

  Pedro : It's a sledgehammer.

  Napoleon Dynamite : Dang! You got shocks, pegs... lucky! You ever take it off any sweet jumps?

  Napoleon Dynamite : [Cut to Pedro jumping]  You got like three feet of air that time.

• Pedro : They're pretty good, except for one little problem. That little guy right there. He is nipple number five. A good dairy cow should have, like, four.

• Napoleon Dynamite : Well, nobody's going to go out with *me*!

  Pedro : Have you asked anybody yet?

  Napoleon Dynamite : No, but who would? I don't even have any good skills.

  Pedro : What do you mean?

  Napoleon Dynamite : You know, like numchuku skills, bow hunting skills, computer hacking skills... Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills!

  Pedro : Aren't you pretty good at drawing, like animals and warriors and stuff?

  Napoleon Dynamite : Yes... Probably the best that I know of.

  Pedro : Just draw a picture of the girl you want to take out... and give it to her for like a gift or something.

  Napoleon Dynamite : That's a pretty good idea.

• Napoleon Dynamite : Deb just called me. She pretty much hates me by now.

  Pedro : Why?

  Napoleon Dynamite : Because my uncle Rico's an IDIOT.

  Pedro : Do you have anything to give to her?

  Napoleon Dynamite : No. Not unless she likes fish.

• Napoleon Dynamite : So, we're pretty much friends by now, right?

  Pedro : Yes.

  Napoleon Dynamite : So, you got my back and everything, right?

  Pedro : What?

  Napoleon Dynamite : Never mind.

• Pedro : Did you draw her a picture?

  Napoleon Dynamite : Heck yes I did!

• Pedro : If I win, you can be my secretary or something.

  Napoleon Dynamite : Sweet! Plus I could be your bodyguard, too. Or like, Secret Service Captain, or... whatever...

  [trails off] 

• Napoleon Dynamite : Pedro, how do you feel about that one?

  Pedro : It looks nice.

  Napoleon Dynamite : Yeah, it looks pretty sweet. It looks awesome. That suit, it's... it's incredible.

• Deb : Are they still letting you run for president?

  Pedro : Yes. I don't understand... they say you're not allowed to have pinatas that look like real people, but in Mexico, we do it all the time.

• Napoleon Dynamite : My old girlfriend from Oklahoma was gonna fly out for the dance but she couldn't cause she's doing some modeling right now.

  Pedro : Is she *hut*?

  Napoleon Dynamite : See for yourself.

  [hands him Deb's glamour shot sample] 

  Pedro : Wow.

  Napoleon Dynamite : Yeah, I took her to the mall to get some glamour shots for her birthday one year.

  Pedro : I like her bangs.

  Napoleon Dynamite : Me too.

• Pedro : Who was that?

  Napoleon Dynamite : Trisha.

  Pedro : Who's she?

  Napoleon Dynamite : My woman I'm taking to the dance.

  Pedro : Did you draw her a picture?

  Napoleon Dynamite : Heck yes I did.

• Napoleon Dynamite : [Napoleon sits down with Pedro at lunch]  Where have you been?

  Pedro : I was *seek*.

  Napoleon Dynamite : Has Summer said anything to you yet?

  Pedro : No, not yet.

  Napoleon Dynamite : Well, she said no.

  Pedro : She did?

  [Pedro thinks a second] 

  Pedro : Well, what about that other girl?

  Napoleon Dynamite : What other girl?

  Pedro : The one that left all that crap on your porch.

  Napoleon Dynamite : You mean Deb?

  Pedro : Yes her.

  Napoleon Dynamite : What about her?

  Pedro : Well, I asked her out too.

  Napoleon Dynamite : What?

• Pedro : Well, what are you going to wear to the dance?

  Napoleon Dynamite : Just like a silk shirt or something. What are you gonna wear?

  Pedro : Deb has something for me. But you should probably get a suit.

• Napoleon Dynamite : How long did it take you to grow that moustache?

  Pedro : A couple of days.