Toy Story 3 (2010)
Don Rickles: Mr. Potato Head
Photos
Quotes
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[first lines]
[Mr. Potato Head, portraying One-Eyed Bart, jumps out of a train while carrying money sacks]
Mr. Potato Head : [laughs evily] Ah, ha ha ha! Money, money, money!
[Woody lassoes a rope to grab the money from Mr. Potato Head's hands, then trips him]
Woody : You've got a date with justice, One-Eyed Bart!
Mr. Potato Head : Too bad, Sheriff! I'm a married man!
[Mrs. Potato Head jumps onto the train, giving karate yells]
Woody : One-Eyed Betty?
[Mrs. Potato Head chases Woody across the train tops, then uses nunchucks to knock him off. As the Potato Heads look and laugh evily, Woody suddenly reappears, riding Bullseye with Jessie]
Jessie : I think you dropped something, mister!
Mr. Potato Head : Jessie?
Woody : Give it up, Bart! You've reached the end of the line!
Mr. Potato Head : I always wanted to go out with a bang!
[Mr. Potato Head presses a button on a remote, causing dynamite to blow up the bridge]
Jessie : Oh, no!
Woody : The orphans!
[cut to a group of Troll dolls riding the train]
Mr. Potato Head : Hate to leave early, but our ride is here!
[Three aliens drive up in a pink Barbie Corvette]
Aliens : Ooh!
Mr. Potato Head : It's me or the kiddies, Sheriff! Take your pick!
[the Potato Heads jump into the convertible and drive off]
Woody : Ride like the wind, Bullseye!
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Mr. Potato Head : [after spending the night in the daycare sandbox] It was cold and dark, nothing but sand and a couple of Lincoln Logs.
Hamm the Piggy Bank : Eh... I don't think those were Lincoln Logs.
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Mr. Potato Head : Remember all that bad stuff I said about Andy's attic? I take it all back.
Slinky Dog : Ya darn-tootin'
Hamm the Piggy Bank : You said it!
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[Woody jumps on to a train of orphaned Troll dolls. He pulls the brake to try and stop the train before reaching the broken bridge, but they still fall into the canyon]
Jessie : No!
[Suddenly, Buzz Lightyear appears, lifting the train and its passengers out of the canyon]
Buzz Lightyear : Glad I could catch the train!
Woody : Now let's catch some criminals!
Buzz Lightyear : To infinity and beyond!
[Cut to the Potato Heads and the aliens in their car, counting money and laughing evily]
Aliens : [pointing at the sky] Ooh!
[Buzz flies above the bandits and slices their car with his laser. After the criminals tumble to the ground, Woody, Buzz, and Jessie enter]
Woody : Reach for the sky!
Mr. Potato Head : You can't touch me, Sheriff. I brought my attack dog with a built-in force field!
[Mr. Potato Head calls Slinky Dog over with a whistle. Slinky bounces down from the mountains and forms the force field around the Potato Heads and aliens]
Woody : Well, I brought my dinosaur who eats force field dogs!
Jessie : Yodel-ay-hee-hoo!
[the ground cracks apart, and Rex emerges. He roars at the evildoers, but then notices something]
Rex the Green Dinosaur : Huh?
Buzz Lightyear : [a pig-shaped spaceship suddenly appears. Its driver is Hamm, portraying Dr. Porkchop] Evil Dr. Porkchop!
Hamm the Piggy Bank : That's *Mr.* Evil Dr. Porkchop to you.
[Hamm teleports the Potato Heads, the aliens, and Slinky onto his ship. He also pushes a button reading, "Death by Monkeys," trapping our heroes with a flood of plastic red monkeys. As Mr. Potato Head reaches toward a button activating a destructive ray, the scene suddenly cuts to Andy's bedroom. The whole scene actually took place in Andy's imagination, as he plays with the toys and a cardboard spaceship]
Young Andy : [as Woody] Buzz, shoot your laser at my badge!
Young Andy : [as Buzz] Woody, no! It'll kill you!
Young Andy : [as Woody] Just do it!
[Andy shields Buzz's eyes and pushes the laser button. He uses his finger to trace the laser bouncing off Woody's badge, then knocks the spaceship and its evil passengers towards the ground]
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Mr. Potato Head : [to the Peas-in-a-Pod] I told you kids to stay out of my butt!
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Rex the Green Dinosaur : Mr. Lotso, do toys here get played with every day?
Lotso : All day long! Five days a week.
Jessie : But what happens when the kids grow up?
Lotso : Well now, I'll tell you.
[Lotso walks over to a wall with class photos from past years]
Lotso : When the kids get old, new ones come in. When they get old, new ones replace them. You'll never be outgrown, or neglected. Never abandoned or forgotten. No owners means - no heartbreak!
Jessie : Yee-haw!
Mrs. Potato Head : It's a miracle!
Mr. Potato Head : And you wanted us to stay at Andy's!
Woody : Because we're Andy's toys!
Lotso : [walks over] So you got donated by this "Andy", huh? Well it's his loss, Sheriff. He can't hurt you no more.
Woody : Whoa! Whoa, whoa whoa...
Lotso : Now let's get you settled in.
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Jessie : Woody, we were wrong to leave Andy. I - I was wrong...
Mr. Potato Head : Jessie's right, Woody. She was wrong.
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[from trailer]
Buzz Lightyear : Hold on, this is no time to be hysterical!
Hamm the Piggy Bank : This is the perfect time to be hysterical.
Rex the Green Dinosaur : Should we be HYSTERICAL?
Slinky Dog : No!
Mr. Potato Head : Yes!
Buzz Lightyear : Maybe! But not right now!
Hamm the Piggy Bank : C'mon. Let's go see how much we're going for on eBay.
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Mr. Potato Head : You would not believe what I have been through tonight!
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[the Aliens have just saved the toys from the incinerator]
Mrs. Potato Head : You saved our lives!
Mr. Potato Head : And *we* are eternally grateful!
[hugs the aliens]
Mr. Potato Head : My boys!
Aliens : Daaaaaady!
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Mrs. Potato Head : Darling, are you okay?
Mr. Potato Head : I feel fresh, healthy, It's terrible.
Mrs. Potato Head : You've lost weight, and so tall.
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Woody : [walks to his gang] Look, everyone, it's nice here, I admit. But we need to go home.
Jessie : We can have a whole new life here, Woody. A chance to make kids happy again.
Slinky Dog : Why don't you stay?
Rex the Green Dinosaur : Yeah, Woody. Stay with us.
Hamm the Piggy Bank : Come on, Woodster!
Mr. Potato Head : You'll get played with.
Woody : I can't. No.
Mrs. Potato Head : Stay here.
Jessie : You can make a new kid happy.
Woody : No, no. Guys, really. No! I have a kid. You have a kid. Andy! And if he wants us at college, or in the attic, well, then, our job is to be there for him. Now, I'm going home. Anyone who wants to join me is welcome. Come on, Buzz.
[short pause]
Woody : Buzz?
Buzz Lightyear : [walks over to Woody] Our mission with Andy is complete, Woody.
Woody : [shocked] What?
Buzz Lightyear : And what's important now is we stay together.
Woody : [shows Andy's name on his boot] We wouldn't even be together if it weren't for Andy! Look under your boot, Buzz. You, too, Jessie. Whose name is written there?
Rex the Green Dinosaur : Maybe Andy doesn't care about us anymore.
Woody : Of course he does. He cares about all of you! He was putting you in the attic. I saw. You can't just turn your back on him now!
Jessie : [walks over to Woody, losing it] Woody, wake up! It's over! Andy is all grown up!
Woody : [angry] Okay, fine. Perfect! I can't believe how selfish you all are.
[Jessie shows an angry look]
Woody : So this is it? After all we've been through.
[Buzz walks to Woody and wants to shake his hand but Woody starts to storm off. Bullseye follows him behind]
Woody : Bullseye, no. You need to stay.
[keeps on following him]
Woody : Bullseye, no... I said STAY!
[Bullseye starts to whimpers]
Woody : Look, I don't want you left alone in the attic, okay? Now, stay.
[starts to walk away]
Bonnie's Mom : [os] Bonnie? Bonnie?
Woody : Uh, I gotta go.
[Woody runs to the door, they find their places quickly]
Bonnie's Mom : [enters the door] Bonnie, you in here?
[Woody heads through the door]
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Mr. Potato Head : But these toddlers... they don't know how to play with us!
Rex the Green Dinosaur : They're too young!
