3rd Rock from the Sun (TV Series)

The Physics of Being Dick (1998)

Kristen Johnston: Sally Solomon

Photos 

Quotes 

• Dick : Using Coulomb's Third Law, I was able to prove that he did it.

  Tommy : What does that have to do with it?

  Dick : Nothing. All I proved was that he's rotating around the sun, but he didn't know that. That's the wonderful thing about physics, nobody understands it.

  Sally : So you can use your knowledge to bully people into submission.

  Dick : That's the plan. As long as America's educational system remains woefully inadequate, I rule!

• Dr. Dick Solomon : [looking forward to speaking at Career Day at Tommy's school]  Once your classmates hear me speak, you'll be the toast of the school.

  Sally : Wait, are you kidding, Dick? You're a Physics professor. I mean, that's almost as dorky as...

  [everyone thinks it over] 

  Tommy : I got nothin'.

  Harry Solomon : I'm stumped.

• Dr. Dick Solomon : [Dick is offended that everyone thinks his job is pointless]  This is outrageous. I'm wise, and revered, and I work damn hard. Who do you think puts food on the table?

  Sally : I put it there!

  Tommy : I'm going with America's farmers.

  Harry Solomon : There's food on the table?

• Dr. Dick Solomon : [Sally shows up in the bar, claiming she's completed her fact-checking work for Mary]  Are you telling me that Mary's presentation is already perfect?

  Sally : Well, she thinks it is, and I'm getting paid not to argue. Ka-ching!

  [Harry hits the bell on the bar to echo her words] 

  Dr. Dick Solomon : You got lucky, damn you.

  Sally : I'll tell you the secret. You just pucker up, vapor-lock onto your boss's butt, and hold on. No independent thought required. In fact, it just gets in your way.

• Dr. Mary Albright : [in the bar, after Mary's disastrous talk]  Line 'em up, Harry. Five martinis.

  Nina : No, Harry. Dr Albright, we should take you home now.

  Dr. Mary Albright : No, Nina. I have brain cells that will remember this evening, and I want them *destroyed!*

  Sally : Hey, Dr Albright, how did your talk go?

  Dr. Mary Albright : [livid]  How did my talk go. Let's see. First of all, the Bolivians were highly amused when I confused the name of their president with the word for 'kayak'. But they stopped laughing when, in their native tongue, I welcomed them to my... 'womany place', and told them...

  Dr. Mary Albright : [she shouts the rest with wild hand gestures]  ... I told them there was room for everyone!