- H.M. Murdock: I gotta have this thing back in three hours, okay, or Dr. Richter is gonna be very upset when he finds out that I borrowed his limo. It's gonna set the trust aspect of our therapy back three years, not to mention the fact he's gonna strangle me.
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: I can't believe that Fulbright would sink that low. That he would find an unrequited love from my youth and force her to set me up, that's just...
- "Hannibal" Smith: She's after the reward, Face.
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: Why Hannibal, you are so cynical.
- "Hannibal" Smith: [stiffling a laugh] How many times did you con this guy, Face? I bet he was your number one stooge.
- Elaine: He talked about you constantly. Always told me what a great guy you were.
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: I am a great guy! Barry was interested in pirates, and for twenty bucks I sold him a treasure map.
- "B.A." Baracus: I'm glad I didn't know you when I was a kid.
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: You know, Hannibal, I'm worried about Rebecca. What if the military's detained her?
- "Hannibal" Smith: Well, if they detained her, it's because they wanted to take back the reward they paid her.
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: Well, of course, if there was a treasure, I'd, eh, I'd own half of it because I sold him the map in the first place.
- "Hannibal" Smith: Face!
- [gives him a stern, persuasive grin]
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: Ok, Barry owns the whole thing, ok? He'd want me to have half of it, cause he's a friend of mine, but...
- "B.A." Baracus: You cool it with this parrot, Murdock. There is no parrot. And I don't wanna hear another thing about it.
- Barry Green: Well actually, that's who has the real treasure map, my parrot. See, the chart's in the bottom of the parrot's cage, in my office.
- H.M. Murdock: Enough said...
- "Hannibal" Smith: [to Barry's parrot] One wrong move, bird, and you're a feather duster. Got it?
- Barry's parrot: Nice bird, pretty bird.
- Barry Green: Temp, do you remember the day that you conned me out of my Alman Brothers tickets?
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: Listen Barry, look, I never realized how hard I was on you, it's just that you were so easy, you were like a proving ground to me.
- Barry Green: No, no, see, that was the day Elaine and her family came the orphanage.
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: Aha.
- Barry Green: Now I had to be you for a couple of hours, while you were gone remember?
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: Yeah.
- Barry Green: They really liked me, and that was the day they decided to adopt me. I told them the truth later.
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: You told them you were me and they, they adopted you?
- Morgan: [holding Philip's Cross] Well now, ain't that something.
- H.M. Murdock: That's a sacred relic, Morgan. You keep that, you'll be doomed for all eternity.
- Morgan: I'll take my chances.
- Barry Green: How did you find us?
- Morgan: I got the location of the wreck out of your computer.
- Barry Green: You can work a computer?
- Morgan: No, but Maitland can, if you put a gun in his back. Allright, all of ya, face down on the deck. Move it!
- Barry Green: Are you gonna kill us?
- Morgan: You and the girl maybe, but the others are worth much more alive, being the A-Team.
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: You got the cross and you, eh, you want the reward on top of that?
- Morgan: Got to live on something, before we can bust this thing up and fence it.
- Elaine: [wearing a police uniform] Excuse me, Templeton Peck?
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: Eh, me? Oh, no, no, no, I'm, eh, Teddy Peddleton, I, eh...
- [tries to walk away, pulls off his name tag as she grabs his arm]
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: Oh this, I must have picked up the wrong name tag, I...
- Elaine: Don't let the uniform scare you, I'm just a meter maid. I'm Barry Green's sister.
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: Barry Green doesn't have a sister.
- Elaine: When he was sixteen, my family adopted him.
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: Oh, well that's great, eh...
- [tries to walk again, but is grabbed by the arm once more]
- Elaine: Listen, I came today hoping you'd be here. I haven't heard from Gary in two weeks.
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: Ah, well, I haven't heard from Gary in twenty years.
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: I think she needs our help.
- "Hannibal" Smith: Face, she's a cop.
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: She's a meter maid!
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: [parrot snaps at him] I think that parrot's carnivorous.
- H.M. Murdock: Don't be ridiculous, Face, birds are not carnivorous. I'll show you, you just gotta know how to talk to him, let him know you're friendly. Nice birdie, nice birdie.
- [parrot snaps at him too]
- H.M. Murdock: This bird IS a maneater!
- "B.A." Baracus: Face, did you really sell your best friend a fake treasure map?
- Templeton "Faceman" Peck: B.A., I needed the money, ok?
- Rebecca Piper: How am I going to keep him busy for 15 minutes?
- General Harlan 'Bull' Fulbright: Do what you got to do, baby, it's a big reward.