- Uncle Casimir Stivic: [Mike's uncle learns that Mike and Gloria plan to have a protestant minister perform their wedding] You were born and baptized a Catholic, and I promised your father when the time came, a priest would administer the sacrament of marriage.
- Archie Bunker: Hold it, hold it. I got somethin' to say about this here. I ain't goin' through with none of these ceremonies or all that mumbo-jumbo, some Catholic priest sprinklin' incest over everybody!
- Edith Bunker: Tell us about Mike. What was he like when he was little?
- Uncle Casimir Stivic: Oh well he was a very special kind of kid. He really liked people. He always had this urge to help people worse off then he was.
- Archie Bunker: Who could be worse off than him?
- Gloria: [doorbell rings] Oh, that must be Uncle Kasim. Daddy, now please be nice. Please?
- Archie Bunker: I'm always nice, little girl. Now go and open the door and let Uncle Polack in.