Ernest T. Bass gets a job in Mayberry but not for very long. His enforcement technique is somewhat lacking as he's taken to throwing rocks or bricks at motorists who don't follow his instructions. Andy gives him fair warning, but when he continues to throw bricks, Andy fires him on the spot. As luck would have it, Malcolm Merriweather has returned to Mayberry and Andy thinks he has the perfect replacement for the crossing guard job. Malcolm accepts the job with pleasure and takes it all quite seriously, but Ernest T. tells him that unless he leaves town intermediately, he will fight him. Malcolm's inclination is to move on but he finally decides to stand his ground and take whatever comes. The only problem is that he doesn't know how to fight and asks Goober to teach him.
—garykmcd