- [first lines]
- Ellie Winters: I certainly didn't bring you any luck, Bat.
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: Well, I knew it would happen one day. I admire cleanliness, but, ah...
- [shows Ellie his empty billfold]
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: ...not in a wallet.
- [admiring Lucy's diamond necklace]
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: Why, this must be worth a fortune!
- Lucy Carter: Well, I don't know what you consider a fortune, Mr. Masterson, but it's insured for $150,000.
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: That's my idea of a fortune.
- [Ellie catches Bat, on his way to meet the beautiful Lucy Carter, tiptoeing past her room]
- Ellie Winters: You're so considerate of the other guests.
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: Your friend just lost his bet - do you want to lose some teeth?
- Henchman: No offense, mister. Maybe we just had too much to drink, huh?
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: That's a human failing - I guess you're human.
- [Lucy's diamonds have been stolen under Bat's nose]
- Lucy Carter: There's no need for you to leave, Bat.
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: I plan to catch your *visitor*. You have diamonds to regain; I have a reputation to regain.
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: You know, you amaze me. After what happened, I'd have thought you'd never want to see me again.
- Lucy Carter: Diamonds are a lot easier to replace than friends.
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: It doesn't add up, Ellie.
- Ellie Winters: Maybe you're not very bright at arithmetic.
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: It happened too fast, too easy, as though it were meant to happen.
- [Ellie imitates Lucy's Southern drawl]
- Ellie Winters: Bat, darlin', you just don't understand us Southern gals.
- [returning to her usual voice]
- Ellie Winters: Did it ever occur to you that your southern-fried chicken just might be in on it?
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: Don't reach for you gun, mine is much handier.
- [Reed emerges from behind a curtain with his pistol drawn]
- Reed Morgan: So is mine.
- [indicating Morgan's hat floating on the river]
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: Don't hurry, boys. Mr. Morgan was a silent partner - he's very silent now.
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: I'll correct you on one thing. Diamonds maybe easier to replace than friends, but they're a lot more reliable than some friends I know.
- Ellie Winters: So all along that southern-fried chicken was using your cane for a nest.
- William Barclay 'Bat' Masterson: I said I was working on the case - some just take longer than others.
- Ellie Winters: Especially if there's a beautiful blonde involved.
- [first lines]
- Narrator: Saint Joseph, Missouri - 1882. Luck wasn't running to form for Bat Masterson, the man who became a legend in his own time.