Bewitched (TV Series)
And Then There Were Three (1966)
Dick York: Darrin Stephens
Photos
Quotes
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Darrin Stephens : You know, Endora, sometimes you can be almost human.
Endora : This is no time to be insulting.
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Endora : Samantha just presented me with the most beautiful granddaughter.
Darrin Stephens : [nervous, yet pleased] You mean... I'm... I'm the father of a girl?
Endora : That too.
Darrin Stephens : Well, that's just great. And Sam? How's Sam?
Endora : She's fine. She's fine.
Darrin Stephens : Endora, I don't know what to do first, to hug you or offer you a cigar.
Endora : There's no other choice?
Darrin Stephens : I have a daughter!
[he hugs her]
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[first lines]
Samantha Stephens : [Samantha and Darrin are leaving for the hospital to have the baby] Oh, darling. Don't you think we ought to call your mother and father, and let them know we're going to the hospital?
Darrin Stephens : Sweetheart, we haven't got time... I'll call them later.
Samantha Stephens : How about Derek?
Darrin Stephens : I'll call him, too... Do we know a Derek?
Samantha Stephens : Not yet. I just thought it might be a nice name if it was a boy.
Darrin Stephens : Honey, we can decide on that later. How about your mother? Should we let her know?
Samantha Stephens : Oh, don't worry. She'll be there.
Darrin Stephens : [the phone rings] Don't answer it.
Samantha Stephens : It'll only take a minute. Now, you run out and get the car.
Samantha Stephens : It'll only take a minute. Now, you run out and get the car.
[answers the phone]
Samantha Stephens : Hello?
Serena : Samantha. This is Serena. Your cousin Serena.
Samantha Stephens : Well, Serena. What are you doing in town?
Serena : Well, darling, it's the in place to be at this time of year. When are you having the baby?
Samantha Stephens : Oh, in an hour or so.
Serena : Well, I guess that kills lunch.
Samantha Stephens : Probably dinner too.
Serena : Look, why don't I pop into the hospital and brighten your stay?
Samantha Stephens : Marvelous. I'll be at the Perkins Hospital and... ooh!
Serena : What did you say?
Samantha Stephens : Nothing. But I think someone is trying to tell me something. Bye-bye, Serena.
Darrin Stephens : Sam, are you all right?
Samantha Stephens : Oh, I'm fine. Just fine. Darling? How about "Serena", if it's a girl?
Darrin Stephens : Sweetheart, if you don't hurry, we may end up calling the baby "Freeway", because that's where it's going to be born.
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Endora : Luckily she
[she being Tabatha]
Endora : takes after Samantha.
Darrin Stephens : She does look like Sam. But I think there's a little bit of me there too.
Endora : Yes, but the wrinkles will disappear soon.
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Nurse Kelton : Who's Endora?
Darrin Stephens : She took my baby's childhood away from her. I've got to stop her.
Nurse Kelton : Oh, I've GOT to get out of this business.
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Darrin Stephens : Please. Please don't go. Get back to the nursery.
Serena : I beg your pardon.
Darrin Stephens : You see, I'm your father. Your daddy. Me da-da. Da-da?
Serena : Are you a psychiatric patient here?
Darrin Stephens : Quick. Back into your bassinet.
Serena : What is all this?
Darrin Stephens : Please, you'll miss your feeding. Please believe me.
Serena : Look, I wasn't born yesterday, you know.
Darrin Stephens : I know. You were born today. Please get back to the nursery.
Serena : No, YOU get back to the nursery.
Serena : [Serena zaps Darrin back to the nursery with a pacifier in his mouth]
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Darrin Stephens : Don't play dumb with me, Endora. You've done some pretty rotten things in your time, but I didn't think you'd stoop this low. You're just an irresponsible, nasty...
Endora : Aah, aah, aah, ahh! Careful! You're asking for it.
Darrin Stephens : I'm not asking for anything. I'm telling you to take me to my daughter!
Endora : WELL, if that's what you want.
[Zaps Darrin over to nursery, next to Nurse Kelton]
Nurse Kelton : Look, just for the record, I'd like to ask you something. You're not really here, right? I mean I saw you here earlier with a pacifier in your mouth and now I see you here in your Indian suit. But, it's all in my imagination, right? You don't really exist, right?
Darrin Stephens : Right.
Nurse Kelton : Thanks.
[Darrin leaves. Nurse Kelton calmly picks up the telephone]
Nurse Kelton : Doctor Hassonbladt, Nurse Kelton. I'd like to make an appointment for a complete psychiatric examination, doctor.
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[last lines]
Darrin Stephens : [after Samantha says it's too early to tell if Tabatha is a witch] Honey, you're a witch. Can't you tell anything just by looking at her?
Samantha Stephens : Only that I love her.
Darrin Stephens : Some witch. Even I can tell that.
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Darrin Stephens : I've got to talk to you!
Serena : Not you again!
Darrin Stephens : You shouldn't be walking around like this.
Serena : Really? You shouldn't be walking around like that.
[Zaps Darrin into a Native American chief's outfit, complete with a feathered headdress]
Darrin Stephens : How can you do this to your daddy?
Manager : What's going on here?
Darrin Stephens : I know this all looks very strange... but uh there is an explanation. You see, I'm her father.
Manager : Sure. You're her daddy, right? She was born when you were eight years old, right?
Darrin Stephens : I know it doesn't add up, but she's...
[Sees that Serena has disappeared]
Darrin Stephens : She's gone. I've got to stop her.
Manager : You're not going anywhere.
Endora : [Pops in with arm mockingly raised to greet Darrin] How?
Darrin Stephens : Oh, well you're too late. My baby's out on the town.
Endora : Do you really think you should wear that outfit at your age?