- Coach Hayden Fox: Aww geez! It's the real estate agent. She wants me to sign the papers.
- Michael 'Dauber' Dybinski: Tell her you don't have a pen!
- Coach Hayden Fox: Hey, what about that nice young couple with the two boys? You haven't told them. Maybe they want to buy it.
- Patty Showalter: Uh, unfortunately, there is no couple with two boys. I sort of made them up.
- Coach Hayden Fox: You made up children?
- Patty Showalter: I'm sorry. I'm trying to win a cruise.
- Coach Hayden Fox: Great! Well now I'm stuck with a blood palace and you're going sailing.
- Patty Showalter: Well, the price is so great because it's a murder house.
- Coach Hayden Fox: A what?
- Patty Showalter: Your home is the site of one of the cul-de-sac murders.
- Coach Hayden Fox: Kidding! You're Kidding! Why didn't you tell me that before?
- Patty Showalter: Well, I... I used to tell people, but then they wouldn't buy it.