Even Stevens (TV Series)

Raiders of the Lost Sausage (2002)

Shia LaBeouf: Louis Stevens

Photos 

Quotes 

• Beans : Do these pants make my butt look big?

  Louis Stevens : Yeah.

  Beans : Good. Let's move some dirt!

• Louis Stevens : Dad, it's not what you think!

  Steve Stevens : Did you just dig a giant hole through our basement wall?

  Louis Stevens : Well, yeah... may-maybe that part's what you think. But, hey! You don't know the part about the treasure.

  Steve Stevens : Treasure?

  Louis Stevens : Yeah!

  Steve Stevens : This is just another one of your crazy, half-baked schemes.

  Louis Stevens : No, no, no. No, it's not half-baked. It's fully-baked! I did research!

• Tom Gribalski : You really did your homework on this one... Sacramento Kid!

  Louis Stevens : Yeah, Tom, we're not doing nicknames right now.

• Louis Stevens : I had the Sausage in my hand, but I lost it!

  Steve Stevens : Don't worry about it, son.

  [Louis knocks his hands angrily at the table] 

  Steve Stevens : Hey! We got something better than that.

  Louis Stevens : What's that?

  Steve Stevens : I don't know. I was gonna make a joke, but not enough time has passed. Come on. I'll make you an omelette.

  Louis Stevens : Do you know what's better than omelettes?

  Steve Stevens : What?

  Louis Stevens : Golden sausages.

• Steve Stevens : Louis, how come you're not at school?

  Louis Stevens : Well, how come you're not at work?

  [brief pause as both men chuckle to themselves] 

• [Louis, Twitty and Tom are in the Stevens' basement preparing themselves for a hard day of work finding out what's at the end of a tunnel in the wall] 

  Louis Stevens : Gentlemen, we are about to embark on the greatest adventure of our lives. Let's put our helmets.

  [Louis puts on a football helmet with flashlights duct taped to it; Twitty puts on a hard hat with a headlight] 

  Louis Stevens : [turns to Tom]  Tom, zip up your fly.

  [Tom zips up his pants] 

  Louis Stevens : Let's dig some dirt, huh?

  Tom Gribalski : Uh, what're we gonna do with all the dirt from the tunnel?

  Louis Stevens : Don't worry about that. Gotcha covered. Brought in a dirt moving specialist.

  [Louis snaps his fingers and Beans emerges from behind a bookshelf dressed in baggy khaki pants held up by suspenders] 

  Beans : Do these pants make my butt look big?

  Louis Stevens : [nonchalantly]  Yeah.

  Beans : Good. Let's move some dirt!