- [first lines]
- Debra Barone: Here's the ointment Frank.
- Frank Barone: [begins unbuckling his belt]
- Ray Barone: Hey dad, that's to go!
- Frank Barone: God made man to sew his seed where he may. He made woman to limit the crop to one farmer.
- Ray Barone: [Ray has just gotten home] Hey powderpuff.
- Ray Barone: [Ray sees he has just called Frank "powderpuff". Frank is standing at the fridge holding two apples. He stares at Ray] That's right I'm talking to you. What are you doing here?
- Frank Barone: I have a rash
- Ray Barone: By all means touch all our food