- Leroy Johnson: Hey, who's your Juliet in Kane's class?
- Danny Amatullo: Marion Blunt.
- Leroy Johnson: She's a dog!
- Danny Amatullo: That's being nice. She's a refridgerator with a head.
- Trevor Kane: I have five ex-wives collaborating on a book about my life. A book full of trash, rubbish and sordid...
- Christopher Donlon: Lies?
- Trevor Kane: Would that they were...
- Jesse V. Valesquez: Yo, man, you wanna go to a movie tonight?
- Christopher Donlon: I can't. I'm going out with Daphne.
- Jesse V. Valesquez: Daphne Simone?
- Christopher Donlon: Yeah.
- Jesse V. Valesquez: Hey, eh, listen, Donlon, I'll admit that next to me you're probably the most attractive guy in this school, but, eh, what makes you think she'd be interested in you?
- Christopher Donlon: Well, we've been out for the last three nights in a row... you figure it out.
- Jesse V. Valesquez: Jungle Fever.
- [walks away]
- Christopher Donlon: Come on, Mr, Kane, nobody's gonna ask me to do no Shakespeare, I stink at this stuff.
- Trevor Kane: My dear boy, the fact that an actor stinks should never stop him. Lord knows I've polluted enough stages in my time.