Frasier (TV Series)

High Holidays (2003)

Kelsey Grammer: Dr. Frasier Crane

Quotes 

• Frasier : Dad, when you were at the cafe today you didn't eat a brownie Roz bought for Niles, did you?

  Martin : [In his boxers holding a carton of ice cream]  Yeah, but I replaced it...

  Frasier : For God's sake! That was a pot brownie, you're stoned off your ass!

• [about Martin's excessive Christmas decorating] 

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Ah yes, the magical time of year when the Great Wall of China and my apartment are the only two man-made structures visible from space.

• Martin : [entering Cafe Nervosa]  Eddie and I must have walked about three miles. I'm sweating like a pig.

  [as he moves to take a chair, Frasier hooks it with his foot and pulls it in] 

  Martin : What the hell are you doing?

  Frasier : I am saving that seat for someone who may not wish to have it bedewed with pig sweat.

• Frasier : [discussing Natalie's exotic accent]  God, she could read me the phone book, and I would melt like an overripe Camembert. Imagine what she would do with that -

  [imitating her] 

  Frasier : Camembert.

  Dr. Niles Crane : R-R-R-Roquefort.

  Frasier : Reblochon!

  Dr. Niles Crane : Blu!

  Frasier : [giggling]  We're terrible!

• Dr. Frasier Crane : Yes well, at least you had a better night than I did. Halfway through our date, Natalie got a phone call - an emergency at home.

  [chuckles bitterly] 

  Dr. Frasier Crane : I decided to take a little walk. Twenty minutes later I saw her in a different bar with another man.

  Dr. Niles Crane : There was no emergency?

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Not unless he had an infected earlobe which required an immediate tongue-flicking.

• Martin : The other night, Ronnie made a comment about my 'bowl full of jelly'.

  Roz Doyle : Well everyone puts on a few during the holidays.

  Frasier : Yes but most people don't sit around reading the newspaper and eating an actual bowl full of jelly.