- Phoebe: Hey, you guys can I just like have a second alone with the babies.
- [They hand her the babies and leave them alone]
- Phoebe: So, here you are. It seems like yesterday I was talking to you in that little petri dish. Everyone said labor was the hardest thing I'd ever have to do, but they were wrong this is. Oh, I had the most fun with you guys! I wish I could take you home and see you everyday. Okay, I'll settle for being your favorite Aunt. I know Alice's sister has a pool, but you lived in me. Okay, so we're cool. Yeah, we're gonna be great. Little high fives!
- [Imitates the high fives]
- Phoebe: Ahh! Ahh! Ahh!
- [One of the babies begins to cry]
- Phoebe: Well, if you're gonna cry.
- [She starts crying]
- Chandler: So, are you really gonna go out with that nurse man?
- Monica: Well uh, you and I are just goofing around, I thought, why not goof around with him.
- Chandler: Y'know, I don't know if you've ever looked up the term goofing around in the dictionary. Well, I have, and the technical definition is, two friends who care a lot about each other and have amazing sex and just wanna spend more time together. But if you have this new fangled dictionary that gets you made at me, then we have to, y'know, get you my original dictionary. I am so bad at this.
- Monica: I think you're better than you think you are.
- Chandler: Really? Okay, so...
- Monica: [interrupting] Know when to stop.
- Chandler: Y'know, I sensed that I should stop. So we're okay?
- Monica: Yeah. All right, I'm gonna go tell Dan that it's not gonna happen.
- [They kiss and as she starts to leave, Chandler starts to dance. Without turning around]
- Monica: Don't do the dance.
- Frank Buffay Jr.: Hey, y'know, Alice is gonna be here so soon, you couldn't just like do me a favor and like, like hold them in?
- Phoebe: Sorry Frank, I'm kinda in the middle of the last favor you asked me to do.
- Frank Buffay Jr.: What's with him?
- Phoebe: Umm, sympathy pains. I thought it was really sweet at first, but now I think he's just trying to steal my thunder.
- Joey's Doctor: Now, ordinarily Mr. Tribbiani, we try to break up the stones up with shock waves, but they're too close to the bladder now. Which means we can either wait for you to pass them or else go up the urethra!
- Joey: [interrupting] Whoa-whoa! No-no-no-no-no, nothing is going up! Okay? Up, up is not an option - what's a urethra?
- [Monica whispers in his ear]
- Joey: Are you crazy?
- [Frank was supposed to name one of his sons after Chandler]
- Frank Buffay Jr.: Chandler is a girl. Chandler is a girl.
- Chandler: Hold on, kindergarten flashback.
- Frank Buffay Jr.: No, there was a mistake. It turns out that we missed it on the x-rays, the baby was a girl after all. Chandler is a girl. Chandler is a girl. Chandler is a girl.
- Chandler: Oh, please keep screaming that.
- Rachel: Hi, Pheebs? Okay, so just spoke to the nurse and the reason that your doctor is late is because uh, she's not coming.
- Phoebe: What?
- Dr. Ross Geller: Apparently she fell in the shower and hit her head.
- Phoebe: Oh my God, she's so stupid!
- Dr. Ross Geller: Now, Pheebs, Pheebs, its going to be okay.
- Phoebe: That's easy for you to say. I don't see three kids coming out of your vagina.
- [Phoebe is in labor]
- Frank Buffay Jr.: Hey. I came as soon as I heard.
- Phoebe: Hey. Where's Alice?
- Frank Buffay Jr.: Oh, she's in Delaware. But, don't worry, she told me all about the lamazda training.
- Chandler: Yes, that would be if you get the babies out by the end of the month, you get 2% financing.