Friends (TV Series)

The One Where Rachel Goes Back to Work (2003)

Matthew Perry: Chandler Bing

Photos 

Quotes 

• Monica Geller-Bing : I want you to have a job that you love not statistical analysis and data reconfiguration.

  Chandler Bing : I quit, and you learn what I do?

• Steve : So, do you have any other questions about advertising?

  Chandler Bing : No, no, but - let me show you what I can do:

  [Chandler picks up a bagel and a donut] 

  Chandler Bing : "Bagels and donuts: Round food... for every mood."

  Steve : Monica warned me you might do that.

• Steve : I actually think we might have something for you at the agency.

  Chandler Bing : Really? That's great!

  Steve : It's an unpaid internship.

  [Chandler is startled] 

  Steve : Come on, now. Monica has a good job, and it's not like you have a family to support.

  Chandler Bing : Well, actually, we're trying, and I don't think Monica's gonna wanna postpone it. We're supposed to have sex tonight.

  [Steve looks confused] 

  Chandler Bing : Actually, she's probably at home naked right now.

  [Steve appears increasingly uncomfortable] 

  Chandler Bing : I tend to keep talking 'til somebody stops me.

  [Steve waits awkwardly] 

  Chandler Bing : I can just picture her on the bed right now...

  Steve : Stop!

  Chandler Bing : OK.

• Chandler Bing : [slogan]  Crackers. Because your cheese needs a buddy.

• Monica Geller-Bing : You faked it? You couldn't have faked it.

  Chandler Bing : Yes, you can. You just make the faces and the noises.

  Monica Geller-Bing : Guys can fake it? Ugh, unbelievable! The one thing that's ours... Why would you fake it when we're trying to have a baby?

• Chandler Bing : [slogan]  Cheese. It's milk that you chew.

• Chandler Bing : [slogan]  A grape. Because who can get a watermelon in your mouth?

• Chandler Bing : [slogan]  The phone. Bringing you closer to people who have phones.

• Chandler Bing : [slogan]  Pants. Like shorts but longer.