- [last lines]
- Monica Geller-Bing: Hey, Phoebs, we just wanna give you a heads up. Bill and Colleen hate us.
- Chandler Bing: Owen didn't know he was adopted, and Monica told him.
- [Monica slaps him on the shoulder]
- Phoebe Buffay: Still, he had to find out some time.
- Chandler Bing: Yeah, but how would you like it if someone told the triplets that you gave birth to them?
- [the triplets are sitting right next to him, and they look horrified]
- Chandler Bing: I'm gonna go tell Emma she was an accident.
- Ross: [Ross just found out that Joey and Rachel were together and is now drunk] Ah, love. L-O-V-E love. 'L' is for life. I mean what is life without love?
- [long pause]
- Rachel: [to Joey] Oh my god, are we supposed to answer?
- Ross: 'O' is for OH WOW! 'V' is for this very surprising turn of events which i am *still* fine with by the way. 'EEE'
- [squeals]
- Ross: is for how extreeemeely normal I find it that you two are together and that one day you might get married... and have children of your own...
- Bill: Some little snacks for everybody. Oh, you don't have to eat the sour worms. Those are for Owen.
- Colleen: I'll go get him in a second. By the way, you should know we haven't told him he's adopted yet.
- Chandler Bing: But kids are so intuitive. Don't you think on some level he already knows?
- [Owen comes running in]
- Owen: I'm adopted?
- Chandler Bing: See? Intuitive!
- Bill: What? Where did you hear that?
- Owen: [points at Chandler] He told me! And he paid me 50 dollars not to tell.
- Chandler Bing: Which technically now you should give back!
- Colleen: You told him he's adopted?
- Chandler Bing: I'm so sorry, but you should have a sign out there or something. Or at least whisper it to people when they come in the door. "Owen doesn't know he's adopted, and he also thinks that Santa is real."
- Owen: He isn't?
- Chandler Bing: [to Monica] We have to get out of here, baby!
- Frank Buffay Jr.: [looking at his sleeping triplets] I love you so much...
- [he strokes Frank Jr. Jr. and he moves slightly]
- Frank Buffay Jr.: [quietly] Oh crap! Don't wake up! Don't wake up!
- Joey: [Ross is very hung-over on the couch as Joey enters with a cup of coffee for him] Morning. Here you go.
- Ross: Thanks. Did you stay here all night?
- Joey: Yeah.
- Ross: So you took off my pants and shoes?
- Joey: No, no, no. You actually did that when you were dancing to the Chicago-soundtrack. Look, Ross, about, about Rachel and I. Listen, you don't have to worry about that, okay? Because nothing is gonna happen.
- Ross: What do you mean?
- Joey: Well, she and I said from the beginning that we weren't gonna do anything unless you were okay with it. And clearly...
- Ross: Hey, what are you talking about? I'm fine!
- Joey: It's okay, Ross, alright? I totally understand. Of course you're not fine. You're... You're Ross and Rachel.
- Ross: Except we're not. I mean, we haven't been a couple in like, six years. Oh my god, is that right? Has it been that long?
- Joey: That's what I hear, yeah.
- Ross: This is crazy. I mean, six years? And because of me you guys aren't gonna be together? Can I ask you something? Really, what is this thing with you and Rachel?
- Joey: Come on, I mean, you know me, you know...
- Ross: Joey.
- Joey: I'm crazy about her.
- Ross: And she feels the same way?
- Joey: I think so.
- Ross: Well, then, maybe it's time we all moved on.
- Joey: Yeah, but, Ross, I mean, you're not okay with it.
- Ross: No, but I wanna be. Hey, I will be. Besides, I'm with Charlie, right? Oh my god, I'm still with Charlie, aren't I? I mean, she didn't see the dance, did she?
- Joey: No, no, no, no, that was - that was just for me.
- Ross: [Rachel, Joey and Charlie are eating fajitas, then Ross enters the scene] I'd like to make a toast, to Rachel and Joey
- Rachel: Ooyy!
- Ross: And... to *love*.
- [Rachel, Joey and Charlie are about to drink their margaritas]
- Ross: Ahh, love... l-o-v-e. L is for life, and what is life without love?
- Rachel: [to Joey] Oh my god, I was supposed to answer?
- Ross: O is for Oh WOW! V is for this very surprising turn of events which I am still fine with, by the way.
- [Rachel, Joey and Charlie are about to drink their margaritas again]
- Ross: E is for how *extremely* normal I find it that *you* two are together... and that one day you might get married and have children of your own.
- Joey: [awkward silence] Dude, are you okay?
- Ross: Totally!
- [drinks margarita]
- Rachel: Ross, you don't seem OK.
- Ross: I'm sorry, it must be the pressure of entertaining. I think everyone would feel better if we had some *flan*!
- Charlie Wheeler: Wait Ross, Ross, I-I have to take off.
- Ross: Nooo!
- Charlie Wheeler: I'm sorry, I have a really early class in the morning, but this has been lovely.
- Ross: Wasn't it? And you thought it would be awkward with Joey and that you never really liked Rachel.
- Charlie Wheeler: *You're on fire*! I'll call you in the morning, ok?
- Ross: OK.
- [goes to kitchen]
- Charlie Wheeler: Oh God Rachel, what Ross just said, that is-...
- Rachel: Oh!that's ok, girls tend not to like me.
- Charlie Wheeler: Bye.
- Ross: [Ross enters the room with flan] OK! I guess it's just flan for three! Hey... hey, that rhymed!
- Rachel: You know what Ross? I think we're gonna take of too.
- Ross: Oh, oh... Of course! God, I'm so stupid, you guys are a couple now and you probably just wanna be alone.
- Rachel: No, no, it's just that it's getting late-...
- Ross: Hey, hey, it's fine, it's totally fine. We've got plenty of margaritas, it's all good.
- [oven timer sounds]
- Ross: I don't even know what that's for.
- Chandler Bing: Hey, you must be Owen.
- Owen: Yeah.
- Chandler Bing: I'm Chandler. Hey, I was in the scouts too.
- Owen: You were?
- Chandler Bing: Yeah, in fact my father was a den-mother.
- Owen: Huh?
- Chandler Bing: [changing the subject] You know how to use a compass?
- Owen: I have a badge in it.
- Chandler Bing: You do? That's fantastic!
- Owen: You wanna see it?
- Chandler Bing: I'd love to, but I gotta get back to talking to your parents. They're telling us all about how they adopted you.
- Owen: What?
- Chandler Bing: What?
- Rachel: I'm sorry, this must be so embarrassing.
- Charlie Wheeler: Oh, don't worry. My father is a raging alcoholic.
- [Sarcastically]
- Charlie Wheeler: Oh, I'm sorry, did I make things awkward?
- Monica Geller-Bing: God, this adoption stuff is so overwhelming. There's inter-country adoption, dependency adoption... There are so many ways to go, and this is like the biggest decision of our lives.
- Chandler Bing: [not paying attention] There's a hair in my coffee.
- Phoebe Buffay: They may be a handful, but they sure are cute. Oh, god. The last time I babysat them, they did the funniest thing...
- Frank Buffay Jr.: I haven't slept in *four years*