Friends (TV Series)

The One Where the Stripper Cries (2004)

David Schwimmer: Dr. Ross Geller

Photos 

Quotes 

• Ross : [on attending a party in 1987 with Rachel]  After you told me that she was passed out in our room, I went in there to make sure she was alright. She was lying on my bed, all buried in people's coats. Well, I went to kiss her on the forehead, but it was so dark I accidentally got her lips. I started to pull away - but then I felt her kissing me back. It was only for a second, but it was amazing! And now I found out that you kissed her first!

  Chandler : Wait - what bed did you say she was on?

  Ross : Mine.

  Chandler : I'm pretty sure I put her on *my* bed.

  Ross : No, she was defintely on my bed.

  Chandler : Why would I kiss a girl and then put her on *your* bed?

  Ross : Well, then, who was on my bed?

  Monica : ...Oh! Oh! Oh!

  Ross : [horrified]  No! No! No!

  Monica : Yes!

  Ross : You were under the pile of coats?

  Monica : I *was* the pile of coats.

  Ross : Oh, my god!

  Monica : You were my midnight mystery kisser?

  Ross : You were my first kiss with Rachel?

  Monica : You were my first kiss ever?

  Chandler : ...What did I marry into?

• [Ross is at college reunion and talking to a girl that both he and Chandler used to have a crush on] 

  Ross : He and I both really liked you a lot, but we didn't want anything to jeopardize our friendship - so we kinda made a pact that neither of us could ask you out.

  Missy Goldberg : Really?

  Ross : Yeah - why?

  Missy Goldberg : Well, Chandler and I used to make out. A lot!

  Ross : You did?

  Missy Goldberg : Yeah. We'd go to the science lab after hours...

  Ross : And on my turf?

• Missy Goldberg : So how come it took you so long to ask me out?

  Ross : Do you remember my roomate? Chandler Bing?

  Missy Goldberg : [gesturing]  Sure, he was in your "band".

  Ross : It's been sixteen years, but the air quotes still hurt.