Gilmore Girls (TV Series)

Those Lazy-Hazy-Crazy Days (2002)

Sean Gunn: Kirk Gleason

Quotes 

• Kirk Gleason : One day it occurred to me - cows never wrinkle.

  Michel Gerard : Mm-hmmm.

  Kirk Gleason : Think about it, have you ever seen a wrinkled cow? No, not once. So I thought to myself, "that's weird."

  Michel Gerard : Yes, that and other things.

  Kirk Gleason : So I decided to do a little research. I studied cows, I studied humans. And finally, I discovered the secret, the secret of the cows.

  Lorelai Gilmore : [just entering]  Michel, could you... Hi, Kirk.

  Michel Gerard : Oh good, just in time. Kirk is about to tell us the difference between cows and humans.

  Lorelai Gilmore : You mean other than one's a cow?

• Kirk Gleason : Lorelai, good. Have you used the cream yet?

  Lorelai Gilmore : Uh, not yet, Kirk.

  Kirk Gleason : Good, there's been a little problem.

  Lorelai Gilmore : What kind of problem?

  Kirk Gleason : Nothing of major concern. It just seems that with continual use, the cream develops some weird reactions to light... and air... and movement.

  Lorelai Gilmore : Are you serious?

  Kirk Gleason : Don't worry, it's just a small kink. It'll all be worked out soon.

  Lorelai Gilmore : I have three cases of that stuff sitting at the inn.

  Kirk Gleason : Well, get rid of it.

  Lorelai Gilmore : Kirk.

  Kirk Gleason : Uh, but don't throw it in the trash. Apparently, that would be an EPA violation.

  Lorelai Gilmore : What am I supposed to do with the stuff?

  Kirk Gleason : Shooting it into space is about all I've got now.

  Lorelai Gilmore : Kirk!

  Kirk Gleason : I'll pick up the cases tomorrow.

  Lorelai Gilmore : Thank you.