- Lorelai Gilmore: [talking to Rory about her dream] And then, he kissed me and talked to my stomach.
- Rory Gilmore: Why would he talk to your stomach.
- Lorelai Gilmore: Because, apparently I was pregnant - with twins.
- Paris Geller: I wish I knew if he was right for me. You know? So I don't put myself through all of this for nothing? I mean women fall for men who are wrong for them all of the time, and then they get sidetracked from their goals. They give up careers and become alcoholics and, if you're Sunny von Bülow, wind up in a coma completely incapable of stopping Glenn Close from playing you in a movie.
- Rory Gilmore: I think you should wear your hair down.
- Luke Danes: Yeah, that's tough when the universe is against you, that's like taking on the Manhattan garbage union.
- Kirk Gleason: One day it occurred to me - cows never wrinkle.
- Michel Gerard: Mm-hmmm.
- Kirk Gleason: Think about it, have you ever seen a wrinkled cow? No, not once. So I thought to myself, "that's weird."
- Michel Gerard: Yes, that and other things.
- Kirk Gleason: So I decided to do a little research. I studied cows, I studied humans. And finally, I discovered the secret, the secret of the cows.
- Lorelai Gilmore: [just entering] Michel, could you... Hi, Kirk.
- Michel Gerard: Oh good, just in time. Kirk is about to tell us the difference between cows and humans.
- Lorelai Gilmore: You mean other than one's a cow?
- Kirk Gleason: Lorelai, good. Have you used the cream yet?
- Lorelai Gilmore: Uh, not yet, Kirk.
- Kirk Gleason: Good, there's been a little problem.
- Lorelai Gilmore: What kind of problem?
- Kirk Gleason: Nothing of major concern. It just seems that with continual use, the cream develops some weird reactions to light... and air... and movement.
- Lorelai Gilmore: Are you serious?
- Kirk Gleason: Don't worry, it's just a small kink. It'll all be worked out soon.
- Lorelai Gilmore: I have three cases of that stuff sitting at the inn.
- Kirk Gleason: Well, get rid of it.
- Lorelai Gilmore: Kirk.
- Kirk Gleason: Uh, but don't throw it in the trash. Apparently, that would be an EPA violation.
- Lorelai Gilmore: What am I supposed to do with the stuff?
- Kirk Gleason: Shooting it into space is about all I've got now.
- Lorelai Gilmore: Kirk!
- Kirk Gleason: I'll pick up the cases tomorrow.
- Lorelai Gilmore: Thank you.