- [Bill discovers he's been replaced by his fiancee]
- Bill: Mildred!
- Mildred Makepeace: Yes, William.
- Bill: [astonished] Wha...? My job? Her?
- Graeme: Yes, William.
- Bill: But we're gonna get married, aren't we?
- [crestfallen]
- Bill: Aren't we?
- Mildred Makepeace: No, William, that's quite out of the question. I have my career to consider now.
- Bill: But I made... I made your dad laugh.
- Mildred Makepeace: You make me laugh, too, but I'm not going to marry you.
- [Tim gestures toward a rather fine desk clock as he speaks]
- Tim: William... Old pal... As a token of our appreciation for all you've done in the past, we would like you to accept... from us... this magnificent...
- [Tim sets the clock aside to reveal a:]
- Tim: Piece of cheese. Yes we all know how fond you are of beth Blue Stilton, heh, but this is mousetrap. However, as you can see, we've had it engraved. "To William Edgar Oddle..." Oddle? Oh well, never mind, close enough. "William Edgar Oddle, Good Riddance."
- [Bill has disappeared in a fit of depression]
- Graeme: Oh, if only he'd left a note!
- Tim: He did.
- Graeme: How do you know?
- Tim: It's in my pocket.
- [awkward pause]
- Tim: I'd better get it out and read it, shouldn't I?
- Graeme: Oh, I just hope he hasn't gone off to do something silly.
- Tim: [reading] "Dear Tim and Graeme: I have gone off to do something silly."