- Eustace Charleton Haney: [trying to pass off an eye chart as wall paper] How about "Doctor's waiting room?"
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: No!
- Eustace Charleton Haney: It's real practical. You can sit anywhere in the living room and check your eyes.
- Eustace Charleton Haney: Well, like they say: learning to like wallpaper is like pushing a purple straw hat through a keyhole.
- Lisa Douglas: Mother?
- Eb Dawson: Did you find her?
- Lisa Douglas: No.
- Eb Dawson: Mrs. Mother? Mrs. Mother? She isn't here.
- Lisa Douglas: No. That's strange. I wonder where she could be.