- Oliver Wendell Douglas: [Eb is glued to the TV] I said, "Did you see Mr. Douglas?"
- Eb Dawson: No, sir. The only thing I've seen is "Petticoat Junction."
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: Eb, I'm not in the mood - Turn that thing off!
- Eb Dawson: [watching intently] Huh?
- Eb Dawson: [Oliver turns TV off] Mr. Douglas do you know what you just did?
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: Yes.
- Eb Dawson: You silenced the work of hundreds of technicians and actors. Not to mention the relatives of the producer. Those people that slave in the fleshpots of Hollywood to bring you a few moments of happiness and joy, and you cut 'em off with the flick of your wrist!
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: [learning Lisa was upset] She had nothing to cry about. All I did was complain she out to be able to do a few things like changing light bulbs or hammering a nail in the wall.
- Eb Dawson: How can she hammer a nail in the wall when it's got that big home in it?
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: She made that hole.
- Eb Dawson: And you say she's not handy!