- Dr. Meredith Grey: You're sleeping with someone?
- Dr. George O'Malley: What? Who?
- Dr. Cristina Yang: Why is that such a shock? Even George managed to get some action.
- Dr. George O'Malley: Correction, George got some syphilis.
- Dr. Preston Burke: Who is Dr. McDreamy?
- Dr. Miranda Bailey: Me. I'm Dr. McDreamy. I'm tall, and handsome, and I like to lean against things, and ponder the difficulties of dating beautiful women. I am trying to be a surgeon here!
- Dr. George O'Malley: [talking to himself] Oh, hi, Chief. No, not much going on, well, other than your interim chief making out with my friend in the stairwell, but hey... sponge duty sucks.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Talking to yourself now?
- Dr. George O'Malley: Yes. No. Damn it. I'm a bad sponge. A leaky sponge. I'm gonna leak all the wrong secrets. I'm a bad liar. I can't even lie about talking to myself. You look nice today.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Wore my new lip gloss 'cause my ex-boyfriend's wife looks like Isabella freakin' Rossellini, and I'm like... me. I'm trying to outdo her when she's the victim here, how crazy is that?
- Dr. George O'Malley: Not crazy. Smart, you know? Gloss, you know, prevents chapped lips. Y - you - w-was that ex-boyfriend?
- Dr. Meredith Grey: I'm an evil mistress.
- Dr. George O'Malley: Well still... you look nice.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Thanks. What are you doing here?
- Dr. George O'Malley: Well... uh -
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Come on, O'Malley, out with it.
- Dr. George O'Malley: Okay, can you think of any reason, any reason at all, really, why Cristina would be kissing Burke?
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Let's play a game of whose life sucks the most. I'll win. I always win.
- Dr. Cristina Yang: You don't wanna play with me.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Oh, I do. I'll even go first. Derek's married.
- [George spits his beer out]
- Dr. Isobel "Izzie" Stevens: George, beer is dripping from your nostrils.
- [He walks off]
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Told ya I'd win.
- Dr. Cristina Yang: No, you don't win.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Did you hear me? I said Derek is married, as in pig-headed, adulterous, liar, married. Nothing you could say could top that.
- Dr. Cristina Yang: I'm pregnant. I win.
- [Joe collapses]
- Dr. Cristina Yang: Ok, maybe Joe wins.
- Dr. George O'Malley: You know Joe?
- Dr. Miranda Bailey: Oh, yeah. I was the only female intern my year. I didn't know anybody and nobody knew me except Joe. He knew me.
- Dr. George O'Malley: Oh, so you and Joe?
- Dr. Miranda Bailey: All you people ever think about is how to get into somebody's pants. You nasty.
- [She slaps him, and Izzie laughs]
- Dr. Miranda Bailey: That's why you got syphilis.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: So I go upstairs, as I'm walking down the hall I try to prepare myself for what I'm going to see when I walk into my bedroom. I step on a man's jacket that doesn't belong to me. And everything I know... just shifts. Because the jacket that doesn't belong to me is a jacket that I recognize, what I know now is that when I go into my bedroom, I'm not just going to see that my wife is cheating on me. I'm going to see that my wife is cheating on me with Mark, who happened to be my best friend... I walked out, flew out to Seattle.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: And then you met me.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: And then I met you
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Well, what was I to you? The girl you screwed to get over being screwed?
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: You were like coming up for fresh air. It's like I was drowning and you saved me. It's all I know.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: It's not enough.
- Dr. Richard Webber: I want you to listen to me very carefully. As long as I am here, I don't know what's happening out there, with my doctors, my patients, my hospital. You are my eyes today, my ears. I want you to be a sponge.
- Dr. George O'Malley: A sponge?
- Dr. Richard Webber: You report anything and everything happening in this hospital to me.
- Dr. George O'Malley: I'm an investigative sponge.
- Dr. Richard Webber: I'm not fooling around, O'Malley. There's too much happenin' lately under my radar. It stops today.
- Dr. Alex Karev: You don't want to go to County. I mean here they know how to kill you and bring you back, but at County they just know how to kill you.
- Dr. Isobel "Izzie" Stevens: Why are you back here tonight? You don't have a date with McDreamy?
- Dr. George O'Malley: More like McMarried.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: You realize this constitutes hugging?
- Dr. Cristina Yang: Shut up... I'm your person.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: [chasing after her, after she finds out he's married] Meredith!
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Go away.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: Just wait. We should discuss this.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Here's a thought: no. Quit following me.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: At least let me explain.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Explain? You know when you should have explained? The night we met in the bar, before any of the rest of it. Yeah, that would have been a good time to discuss this.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: I know how you feel.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Do you? Somehow I doubt that. Because if you did, you would shut up, and turn around and go back inside. Because you would realize that I am this close to getting in my car and running you down in the parking lot!
- Dr. Richard Webber: O'Malley, yell at me again and I'll snap you like a small twig.
- Dr. George O'Malley: Yes, sir.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: To be a good surgeon you have to think like a surgeon, emotions are messy, tuck them neatly away and step into a clean sterile room, where the procedure is simple, cut suture, and close. But sometimes your faced with a cut that won't heal, a cut that rips the stitches right open.
- Joe: You look familiar. You been in here before?
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Once. That worked out really well.
- Joe: I know that look. It's only one of two things. Either your boss is giving you hell or your boyfriend is. Which is it?
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Both. My boyfriend is my boss, which was a problem. But not as big a problem as the fact that my boyfriend has a wife.
- Joe: I'll tell you what this one's on the house.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: I'm well aware of Richard's recovery time. I'm the one who operated on him, remember?
- Dr. Preston Burke: I do, you operated, he survived, and chose me to take over while recruiting your wife.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: Clearly he has brain damage.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: Addison, what are you doing here?
- Dr. Addison Shepherd: Your hair is different
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: A lot of things are different
- Dr. Addison Shepherd: It's longer, I like it, it's very Russell Crowe
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: What are you doing here?
- Dr. Addison Shepherd: What are you doing here? You just pick up and leave everything, your house, your practice, your friends. You had a life in Manhattan.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: Had
- Dr. Addison Shepherd: And now you have a girlfriend in Seattle. She seems... sweet.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: The ice you're on... thin.
- Dr. Addison Shepherd: She's young. That whole wide-eyed "ooh, he's a brain surgeon" thing happening, but still sweet. Which is what you were going for, right? The anti-Addison.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: If you came here to win me back, you can forget about it.
- Dr. Addison Shepherd: did. I flew all the way across the country to reminisce over wedding photos, get drunk, fall into bed, and make you realize you can't live without me. Relax, Derek, I'm here for work. I'm helming the T.T.T.S. case you guys admitted last week. And after Richard's briefing...
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: Richard knew you were coming out here?
- Dr. Addison Shepherd: He asked me to come. Didn't he tell you?
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: No, he didn't.
- Dr. Addison Shepherd: Hmm, well, surprise.The hair though, you know I've always had a thing for Russell Crowe
- Dr. Meredith Grey: They say, practice makes perfect, theory is the more you think like a surgeon the more you become one. The better you get at remaining neutral, clinical, cut suture close, the harder it becomes to turn it off, to stop thinking like a surgeon, and remember what it means to think like a human being.
- Dr. Richard Webber: I want you to be a sponge.
- Dr. George O'Malley: A sponge?
- Dr. Richard Webber: You report any and everything happening in this hospital to me.
- Dr. George O'Malley: I'm an investigative sponge.
- Dr. Alex Karev: Oh, sure, I'm the guy with the heart of stone, and you brought snacks.
- Dr. Isobel "Izzie" Stevens: It's a working lunch.
- Dr. Alex Karev: Snacks to watch Joe die.
- Dr. Isobel "Izzie" Stevens: He's not gonna die die, they're gonna bring him back.
- Dr. Alex Karev: He's gonna die die, no pulse pulse, he is gonna be dead dead.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: That took a lot of nerve...
- Dr. Addison Shepherd: Oh, come on.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: Requesting Meredith...
- Dr. Addison Shepherd: She came highly recommended.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: Right.
- Dr. Addison Shepherd: So you don't recommend her?
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: No, I did not say that.
- Dr. Addison Shepherd: Just not for her medical skills.
- Dr. Derek Shepherd: Oh, would you shut up.
- Dr. Isobel "Izzie" Stevens: You had it coming.
- Dr. Alex Karev: The dude punches like my sister.
- Dr. Isobel "Izzie" Stevens: Oh, so, by your definition then, you got beat up by a girl.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: All right, details. You're pregnant? What are you gonna do?
- Dr. Cristina Yang: Well, you know what happens to pregnant interns. I'm not switching to vagina squad or spending my life popping zits. I'm too talented, surgery's my life.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: Which begs the question, who are you sleeping with?
- Dr. Cristina Yang: Just a guy.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: That's all I get? You can't just bring something like this up and expect me to drop it.
- Dr. Cristina Yang: Well, watch me.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: After all this time, all your warnings about me sleeping with my boss and you're doing the same exact thing.
- Dr. Cristina Yang: Oh, it's not the same thing.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: It's the exact same!
- Dr. Cristina Yang: No, it's not. You and McDreamy are in a relationship.
- Dr. Meredith Grey: And you and Burke are in?
- Dr. Cristina Yang: Switzerland. It's very neutral there and they make very nice watches.
- Dr. Isobel "Izzie" Stevens: You have been treating these people for the last week, how can you not know their names?
- Dr. Alex Karev: Surgery is the only speciality where we don't waste time getting to know the patients. They're slabs of meat, we're butchers.
- Dr. Isobel "Izzie" Stevens: They're human beings. You do know what a human being is don't you Evil Spawn?
- Dr. Alex Karev: I'm not evil. Unless evil turns you on.
- Dr. Isobel "Izzie" Stevens: Did you ever wake up in the morning and realize that nobody likes you, and... well, I don't know, care?
- Dr. Alex Karev: Oh, oh, I think somebody likes me.
- Dr. Preston Burke: You don't want to go out to dinner, you don't want to meet me in the on-call room and you sure as hell don't want to talk to me. I could pretend I know, but hey, I don't even have your home phone number. So tell me - what do you want