Laura San Giacomo: Maya Gallo

Quotes 

• Jack Gallo : I've been giving this a lot of thought, and I've decided that the all G-string issue is the wrong direction for this magazine.

  Maya Gallo : Dad, I for one am standing by your decision.

  Jack Gallo : Which is why we're doing a special feature on nipple glitter instead.

  Dennis Finch : Woo-hoo!

  [singing] 

  Dennis Finch : They're bright and sparkly, I touch them in the darkly. Everybody!

  [pause] 

  Dennis Finch : Classic Finch. It's good stuff.

• Maya Gallo : Mr. Gallo is very busy at this time.

  Betsy Frayne : I think that bra is a little busy.

• Nina Van Horn : For your protection, I think you should carry a gun too.

  [takes a gun out of her purse] 

  Maya Gallo : You can't give Dennis a gun.

  Nina Van Horn : You're right. The recoil would drop him right in his ass. Here, take this.

  [takes out a switchblade] 

  Nina Van Horn : Remember, it's stab and twist! Stab and twist!

• Maya Gallo : Elliot, what was that you told me about the way you walk?

  Elliot DiMauro : I took it from Al Pacino. Watch this.

  [walks back and forth] 

  Jack Gallo : More like Al Paqueeno.

• Maya Gallo : I don't know what to say.

  Nina Van Horn : Well, I do! Your whole life has been a lie. I mean, who are you, really? You could be an old black woman, and we'd never know. But here's a few things we do know. One: I look great all the time; Two: Maya will die alone; and Three: you have completely freaked us out!

  Dennis Finch : You all feel this way?

  Maya Gallo : Except for the part about me dying alone.