- Tommy Mullaney: How's Zoey doing?
- Michael Kuzak: Zoey?
- Tommy Mullaney: She's the D.A. prosecuting your client. She's also my ex-wife.
- Michael Kuzak: You're kidding! That young blond woman is your ex-wife?
- Tommy Mullaney: Yeah. She told me that she thinks it's funny you representing a guy with multiple personalities when you yourself don't even have one.
- Kyle Santars: How long have you been in Mr. Becker's direct employment?
- Roxanne Melman: 12 years.
- Kyle Santars: And in that time, how many affairs had Mr. Becker had with his female divorce clients?
- Roxanne Melman: I don't know.
- Kyle Santars: More then 25?
- Roxanne Melman: I guess... I don't know.
- Kyle Santars: More then 50?
- [pause]
- Kyle Santars: Answer the question, Miss Melman.
- Roxanne Melman: I'm thinking.
- Arnie Becker: Oh, please Roxanne! 50?
- Kyle Santars: [to Becker] Interrupt again, I'll suspend these proceedings and move for costs and sanctions.
- Arnie Becker: Threaten me again, and I'll pick you like a crusty scab you cheap night school act!
- Douglas Brackman, Jr.: By giving up California Rifle and making it C.J.'s client, she gets 40% of the business. No doubt she promised the kickbacks to you.
- Cara Jean 'C.J.' Lamb: I'm shocked you'd think something like that.
- Douglas Brackman, Jr.: I'm not talking to you, C.J.
- [to Abby]
- Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Abby, you can't do this.
- Abby Perkins: Douglas, I just decided that I didn't want the client anymore. C.J. picked it up, so what's wrong with that?
- Douglas Brackman, Jr.: What's wrong with that? Since you'll be doing all the work for this client, it doesn't make sense. It's just a sham.
- Abby Perkins: Why? As it is all I do is slave away and make other people rich. I would just rather profit C.J. then the partners that's all.
- Douglas Brackman, Jr.: All right. I'm aware that we have a situation here, so this is what I'm prepared to do. I'm cutting your salary by 20%... in exchange for which I'm offering you 20% of the business that you bring in.
- Cara Jean 'C.J.' Lamb: Can you do that?
- Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Of course I can, I'm senior partner. It's similar to the deal that Leland made with you when he was in charge.
- Abby Perkins: Except it's not as good.
- Douglas Brackman, Jr.: No, but that's as good as it gets. I lower overheads and give incentives to you... an associate who's not on a partnership track. You get a big upside now, Abby.
- Abby Perkins: As long as you don't have the right to refuse the clients that I want to bring in.
- Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Agreed... as long as you still bill work hours at 1,800 per year.
- Abby Perkins: Agreed.
- Douglas Brackman, Jr.: Well... that's all then. Dismissed.
- Cara Jean 'C.J.' Lamb: Hey, how would you like to have dinner with me again tonight? We could take in a movie afterwards. Rump Ranger.
- Abby Perkins: Tonight? I can't find a sitter for Eric that fast. Sorry.
- Cara Jean 'C.J.' Lamb: [somewhat disappointed] Uh... okay. Never hurts to ask.
- [C.J. is about to walk out when when Abby turns back towards her]
- Abby Perkins: It's supposed to be terrible, you know.
- Cara Jean 'C.J.' Lamb: What is?
- Abby Perkins: That movie, Rump Ranger. Why not blow it off and come have dinner at my house? You can get to meet my son Eric.
- Cara Jean 'C.J.' Lamb: Okay, you're on.
- Abby Perkins: Eight o'clock. Don't be late.
- Cara Jean 'C.J.' Lamb: Oh, Abby... just one small favor.
- Abby Perkins: What?
- Cara Jean 'C.J.' Lamb: Wear that tight little black dress that you had on during the Christmas party.
- [Abby looks a little shaken]
- Cara Jean 'C.J.' Lamb: Kidding, Abby! Go easy, will you?
- Abby Perkins: You're a real jerk, Lamb.
- Abby Perkins: This is actually better then being a partner because just like before I can leave anytime I want to set up my own private practice and still have time for Eric.
- Cara Jean 'C.J.' Lamb: Partnerships are pretty overrated these days. All that bonding with corporate boneheads. Can you imaging yourself going on a retreat with those guys? Sitting in a mudbath between Leland and Douglas!
- Abby Perkins: I like men.
- Cara Jean 'C.J.' Lamb: So do I.
- Abby Perkins: Oh? So that means you're... uh...
- Cara Jean 'C.J.' Lamb: Flexible?
- Abby Perkins: I see.