L.A. Law (TV Series)
Petticoat Injunction (1988)
Michael Tucker: Stuart Markowitz
Photos
Quotes
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Stuart Markowitz : We'd had pretty much written it off until we got a call from Detective Majeski saying that there'd been a break in the case.
Jack Debente : And what else did the Detective tell you?
Stuart Markowitz : That they had a recovered my watch and they had a suspect in custody, and would we please come down and identify him through photographs which we did.
Jack Debente : And were you able to make a positive identification of the man who robbed you?
Stuart Markowitz : Yes.
Jack Debente : And is the man you identified in this courtroom?
Stuart Markowitz : [Pointing the finger] There he is. Right there, that's the man.
Jack Debente : The record will show that the witness has identified the defendant. Robert Alden. No further questions.
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Lawyer Felix Echeverria : Now according to the report you gave the police, the man who accosted you was 6 foot or over. But, uh, Mr. Alden's only 5 foot 10 1/2 inches.
Stuart Markowitz : So call me a liar for inch an half.
Lawyer Felix Echeverria : Well, if you like that characterization, okay.
Stuart Markowitz : Look, I'm 5 feet 5 1/2. A lot of people look taller to me.
Lawyer Felix Echeverria : So you're saying that your diminutive stature makes you a less than reliable observer.
Stuart Markowitz : No.
Lawyer Felix Echeverria : But you'll acknowledge there's a discrepancy here.
Stuart Markowitz : Yeah... No!
Lawyer Felix Echeverria : You also said the man wore a mustache.
Stuart Markowitz : Now, I'm not sure about that. Um... I think actually he may have shaved it off.
Lawyer Felix Echeverria : Well, my question is, Mr. Markowitz, did he or did he not have a mustache. Why the hesitancy, Mr. Markowitz? Is it because you can't remember? Or is it because you and your wife were so drunk that night you can't be certain who you saw.
Stuart Markowitz : What?
Lawyer Felix Echeverria : Well, you testified, you were on your way back from dinner now. Didn't you share a bottle of wine. In fact, you two guys were pretty looped, weren't you.
Stuart Markowitz : No, that's not the case.
Lawyer Felix Echeverria : Come on, Mr. Markowitz.
Stuart Markowitz : Wait a minute!
Ann Kelsey : Objection, stop putting words in his mouth.
Lawyer Felix Echeverria : Your Honor.
Judge Austin Lyne : Mrs. Markowitz.
Ann Kelsey : He's posing compound questions and brow-beating the witness.
Judge Austin Lyne : You are not the attorney of record here. Sit down.
Jack Debente : Come on.
Ann Kelsey : You can't let him get away with that.
Jack Debente : I'm not going to.
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Lawyer Felix Echeverria : Mr. Markowitz, given the trouble you're having with all this, how can you tell us that Robert Alden is the man who robbed you?
Stuart Markowitz : We weren't drunk and I'm almost positive that's the man.
Lawyer Felix Echeverria : Well, almost positive doesn't put an innocent man in jail, Mr. Markowitz. Not until they suspend the Constitution. Nothing further.
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Stuart Markowitz : What was I supposed to do, lie?
Ann Kelsey : I'm not accusing you, Stuart!
Stuart Markowitz : [arguing] You are accusing me!
Ann Kelsey : I'm not, you did the best you could. I just wish you hadn't let him walk over you, that's all.
Stuart Markowitz : Oh, and you were so forceful, jumping up and objecting like that.
Ann Kelsey : Would you mind? Let's not have a fight in the middle of a cafeteria, okay.
Stuart Markowitz : Where would you rather have a fight?
Cashier : $4.35.
[Ann pays $5.00 for their lunches. The cashier gives Ann changes]
Ann Kelsey : Let's just drop it, Stuart.
Stuart Markowitz : Don't want to talk about it, fine.
Ann Kelsey : Good.
Stuart Markowitz : Fine.
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Abby Perkins : Stuart, what's happening with the yuppie bandit?
Stuart Markowitz : They are accelerating the trial date that we start tomorrow.
Douglas Brackman, Jr. : How long should we figure you two will be tied up with that?
Ann Kelsey : Oh, I don't guess more than a day or two.
Douglas Brackman, Jr. : If we can proceed, Ken Hohl vs.12 Tin Fish Decoys.
Jonathan Rollins : Action for specific performance - the delivery of antiques bought at auction. I'm in depositions all week.
Douglas Brackman, Jr. : Adelman vs. Macks.
Victor Sifuentes : We've instructed the marshal to impound the judgment that is automobiles unless bond's posted by 5'clock.
Douglas Brackman, Jr. : Seiling vs. Steinmetz-Needham Productions.
Arnie Becker : Yeah, hearing for an injunction is scheduled for 2 o'clock.
Michael Kuzak : Sounds like a loser.
Victor Sifuentes : You know, I can't believe that a T.V. actor's going into court because he's unhappy with his part?
Leland McKenzie : [laughing] What's the name of this show?
Arnie Becker : Consenting Adults.
Ann Kelsey : I never even heard of it.
Arnie Becker : That's the producers' whole problem. You see that they've got great reviews, but there are in a tough time slot and they can't get sample so if the numbers don't improve... they're history.
Michael Kuzak : I would think that Jack Seiling would do anything he could boost the ratings?
Arnie Becker : Maybe he doesn't want to go around the rest of his life prancing around his cocktail dress. You know, the public doesn't know how to differentiate between an actor and the role he plays. To millions of people, Raymond Burr will always be a lawyer, Vince Edward is a doctor, Jack Webb a cop.
Stuart Markowitz : Laird Cregar, a psychotic detective. Nobody remembers I wake up screaming?