M*A*S*H (TV Series)

Period of Adjustment (1979)

Jamie Farr: Cpl. Maxwell Q. Klinger

Photos 

Quotes 

• Col. Sherman T. Potter : I think we both realize you're no Radar.

  Klinger : [very drunk]  So they tell me, sir.

  Col. Sherman T. Potter : But, by the same token, Radar is no Klinger.

  Klinger : I don't follow you, sir.

  Col. Sherman T. Potter : Folks around here were awfully fond of Henry Blake when he ran this fort, weren't they?

  Klinger : Well, sure, the Colonel was a top notch kind of a guy!

  Col. Sherman T. Potter : You bet he was. And believe me, my first few days in his shadow were a might uneasy. Nobody was jumping for joy over me. I was no Henry Blake. Never tried to be. That didn't mean I was better or worse, just different. The thing is, the people here gave me a chance to get comfortable and make this job Sherman Potter's. I guess maybe I forgot that when you took over for Radar. What I'm trying to tell you is you need the time to take this job and make it Max Klinger's. So just do it! And if you need some help, if you've got a question, just knock on my door. Is that clear, Max?

  Klinger : Crystal clear, sir.

  Col. Sherman T. Potter : All right, as of right now, Radar's office is closed, Klinger's office is open.

  [Klinger and Potter stand up and salute each other, then Klinger falls back in the chair and passes out] 

  Col. Sherman T. Potter : Okay, we'll open tomorrow.

• Charles : That rapier-like wit. I've seen snappier comebacks from a bowl of Rice Krispies.

  Klinger : Oh, first I'm a plant; now, I'm breakfast food. What next?

  Charles : Well, you're crude and unrefined... how about petroleum?

• Col. Sherman T. Potter : Park it in the chair, Corporal.

  Klinger : It's not plugged in, is it?