Mork & Mindy (TV Series)

Mork's Best Friend (1979)

Robin Williams: Mork

Quotes 

• Mork : You'll enjoy meeting my new friend, Bob.

  Exidor : You made friends with a fuzzy Tootsie Roll?

  Mork : No, Exidor, look! Look closer, it's a caterpillar!

  Exidor : Why, this is no ordinary caterpillar, Mork. This is the reincarnation of Abraham Lincoln!

  Mork : No! How can you tell?

  Exidor : Is that the face of someone who would tolerate slavery?

  Mork : That's not her face.

  Exidor : Really? I thought she was smiling at me!

• Exidor : Mork!

  Mork : Exidor!

  Exidor : In this life, yes!

• Exidor : Mork, I have come here to preach the only true religion!

  Mork : What's the only true religion this time?

  Exidor : Reincarnation! We have all lived before and we shall all be born again!

  Mork : Wow, the ultimate deja vu!

• [Mork's "dead" caterpillar has transformed into a butterfly] 

  Mindy McConnell : Now I guess you probably believe what Exidor said about reincarnation, right?

  Mork : No, I still think Exidor had his head up his foot. But maybe he's right though. Maybe when you die, something beautiful happens.

• Orson : What do you think happens when something dies, Mork?

  Mork : I don't know, Sir. All I know is that when my caterpillar became a butterfly and sprouted wings and flew away, it looked kind of like a little angel.

• Mork : Look! It's a kittypillar!

  Mindy McConnell : Oh, that's a caterpillar.

  Mork : Not for a few more weeks yet, it hasn't got hair on its chest.

• Mork : Thank you, Mindala. And now... a man who is said to have the warmth of a snow pea... Mr. Bickley. Mr. Bickley, if you would, mumble, mumble, mumble...

  Franklin Delano Bickley : With heavy heart, and mournful eyes, and tears that softly flow, we say our final sad goodbyes... to a fuzzy Escargot... Hogslop!

• Exidor : In a previous life, I was a very famous person. Guess who!

  Mork : Are you now or have you ever been a member of the Communist party?

  Exidor : Just to meet girls!

  Mork : Are you currently in a Broadway show?

  Exidor : No.

  Mork : Are you bigger than a breadbox?

  Exidor : Yes!

  Mork : I've got it! You're the editor of The National Enquirer!

  Exidor : He's not dead!

  Mork : I can wait.

• Mindy McConnell : You know, Mork, between your friends and your pets, I sometimes wonder if you're an advanced alien being or just an intergalactic bozo.

  Mork : The answer is... Both!

• Franklin Delano Bickley : You have a bug for a pet?

  Mork : Oh, yes. I pulled a thorn out of its paw and the other thirteen legs followed me home.

• Mork : You should have heard the eulogy I did for my caterpillar. Mindy says that when he dies, he'll go to Heaven, and be with all the other bugs and he'll be very happy and everything will be beautiful.

  Orson : Tell me, if Heaven is so beautiful, so perfect, so great, how come humans don't want to die?

  Mork : Who wants to be with all those bugs?

• Exidor : Mork! I came over as soon as you called! What's wrong?

  Mork : Abraham Lincoln's dead again!

• Mork : It costs money to die?

  Mr. Herman : Only if you want to die decently.

  Mork : Bob died great! And nothing you can do will make her feel any better!

  Mr. Herman : But the point is to make YOU feel better!

  Mork : Well, the only way I'll feel better is if Bob stays with me forever and ever! And that's exactly what I'm gonna do! Keep her with me in my room!

• Mr. Herman : What would you like for an epitaph?

  Mork : Well, I could start out with some shrimp cocktail, have some expresso.

  Mr. Herman : No, I mean what would you like written on the headstone?

  Mork : Oh. "Here lies Bob. She's Dead."

• Mr. Bickley : Nobody has a BUG for a pet!

  Mork : Are you kidding? Bob's clean, she's leaf-broken! And she's a skilled mime too! Bob, do your caterpillar walk against the wind!

• Mork : Fly, Bob! Be free!

• [Mork has brought home a pet] 

  Mork : It's real cute. It's fuzzy. It's about this tall.

  [Mork clamps his fingers down to an inch] 

  Mindy McConnell : A dog that's been run over by a truck?

  Mork : Oh Mindy, that's so sick! Squashed dogs can't follow you home!

• Mork : Hey, maybe you could get something from Mr. Bickley.

  Mindy McConnell : No, I've already had my shots.

• Exidor : Bob has been reincarnated as a cow.

  Mork : That's wonderful!... That's terrible, she'll be eaten!

  Exidor : No, she's safe! She's in India, she's sacred!