NewsRadio (TV Series)
No, This Is Not Based Entirely on Julie's Life (1995)
Dave Foley: Dave Nelson
Quotes
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Dave : Did you ever send out those naked pictures?
Beth : What? Who told you about those?
Dave : Well, nobody told me. I had some film developed and they threw in some nudie pictures of you for free.
Beth : What?
Dave : I'm kidding, Beth. Lisa told me.
Beth : Well, you know I faxed the nudie pictures to Keith, and he invited me to come visit him next week.
Dave : Oh, yeah, well, that's great.
Beth : Yeah, well, so can I have the week off and a two-thousand dollar salary advance?
Dave : No.
Beth : I'll show you the naked pictures...
Dave : Ah, OK, we'll talk.
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Beth : Dave, why don't you just tell her what turns you on and get it over with?
Dave : Because that would ruin it.
Beth : Why's that?
Dave : To tell you the truth, what really turns me on is when Lisa is mad at me.
Beth : OK, I wish I didn't know that. Are you going back to her place now?
Lisa : [calling impatiently from the other room] Dave, are you coming?
Dave : Oh, yeah.
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Dave : OK, um, ever since I was 14, I've always fantasized about making love on the space shuttle...
Lisa : Well, that's, that's, that's adorable, Dave.
Dave : ...with a space prostitute.
Lisa : [long pause] Alright, you're joking again.
Dave : I wish I were.
Lisa : Well, do, do you think you can give me a fantasy that's just a little bit more reasonable?
Dave : [sighs] Ok, uh, let's try this. Come here.
[motioning for Lisa]
Dave : Uh, I'd like to go up on the roof of my building, bring up a blanket, and a very good bottle of wine, and make love with a space prostitute.
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Dave : That's all for this morning meeting, unless anyone has anything they like to say.
Catherine Duke : I do. Today would have been Mahatma Gandhi's birthday, and I think than, in his honor, we should all observe a moment of silence.
[Everyone bows their head]
Bill McNeal : Mahatma who?
Catherine Duke : Mahatma Gandhi.
[pause]
Bill McNeal : A great man.
Catherine Duke : Shut up. It's supposed to be a moment of silence.
[pause]
Bill McNeal : Sorry.
Catherine Duke : Well, thanks for everything. We'll try it again next year.
Matthew Brock : I bet if we lived in India, we'd get like a three-day weekend or something.
Bill McNeal : I think we should also have a moment of silence for Ben Kingsley, who, as we all know, played Gandhi in the movie of the same name.
Catherine Duke : Ben Kingsley's not dead.
Bill McNeal : No, but he's a hell of an actor, isn't he?
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Jimmy James : Morning, wage apes.
Dave : Mr. James, I thought you had vacation this week.
Jimmy James : I'm on it.
Dave : You are?
Jimmy James : Why travel when you have the resources of the world's greatest city right here?
Dave : Right.
Jimmy James : Yeah. I'm gonna go use the can.