One Foot in the Grave (TV Series)

One Foot in the Algarve (1993)

Richard Wilson: Victor Meldrew

Photos 

Quotes 

• Victor Meldrew : Surely you can't change a lightbulb if you've only got one arm?

  Mrs Warboys : [Drunk]  You can if you've still got the receipt.

• [Margaret and Victor are in a morgue to identify a body and there is only a human foot] 

  Victor Meldrew : What is this? A new version of Cinderella by David Lynch?

• Margaret Meldrew : I wasn't that keen on coming to Portugal at first. But now that we're about to leave, I never want to see the bloody place again as long as I live.

  Victor Meldrew : Yes, that's the good thing about a bad holiday, is going home, which is a positive joy. I remember the last time we went on holiday, we came home to find that our house had been demolished.

  Mrs Warboys : [laughs]  Yes, funny you can laugh about it now, right?

  Margaret Meldrew , Victor Meldrew : [They both stare at her angrily, not laughing] 

  Mrs Warboys : I suppose you can't really.

• Victor Meldrew : Yes, everyone else maybe melting to death on the roads but not us! Because we have a car with hair conditionor! I mean what in the name of sanity did they thing we wanted it for? To make sure that the roof rack was more shining and managable?

• Margaret Meldrew : [about Mrs Warboys]  I just cannot believe she was left there like that, in that condition. Next to a complete sheer drop. In total darkness!

  Victor Meldrew : Yes, well there's no point blaming yourself.

  [Margaret turns to him, stammering in anger and disbelief] 

  Margaret Meldrew : I wouldn't put it past you to have trussed her up in a sack and thrown her in!

  Victor Meldrew : Oh for goodness's sake!

  Margaret Meldrew : You have never liked the woman, as long as you've known her! To you, she was just a jibbering old bat who popped round twice a week to polish off our digestive biscuits!