Jon Lovitz: Self

Quotes 

• Jiminy Glick : Don't you think, Jon Lovitz, that it's the comedy people that the women love, but isn't it ultimately in the sack, the ladies want to laugh?

  Jon Lovitz : Well I don't think they want to LAUGH in the sack; I think they want to have, y'know, orgasms, frankly.

  Jiminy Glick : This is dirty talk. And I don't like it.

  [hits Jon with his rolled-up paper] 

  Jiminy Glick : I'm gonna get angry at you.

  Jon Lovitz : You're asking me about sex!

  Jiminy Glick : I'm not asking about sex, Jon Lovitz.

  Jon Lovitz : What are you asking me?

  Jiminy Glick : I'm trying to figure out, I don't know WHAT to ask you. Well, let me just say this, that you have been absolutely...

  Jon Lovitz : What are you leaving, we're done?

  Jiminy Glick : What?

  Jon Lovitz : You're out of questions?

  Jiminy Glick : You talk dirty, you think sometimes you...

  Jon Lovitz : Well you ask dirty questions!

  Jiminy Glick : No no no, I had Billy Graham's son out here, and I asked him the same questions, and his answers were totally different. And I think it's very interesting, but I think of your generation, you feel that you have to talk dirty.

  Jon Lovitz : No, I'm not in that generation.

  Jiminy Glick : Oh yes you are. How old are you?

  Jon Lovitz : I'm forty-four.

  Jiminy Glick : Yeah, right.

• Jiminy Glick : I did love you as the Master Lesbian. And I think...

  Jon Lovitz : Master THESPIAN.

• Jon Lovitz : How did you, like, get where you are?

  Jiminy Glick : [laughs]  Now you're being, you're being facetious, aren't you?

  Jon Lovitz : [imitating Jiminy]  Yes I am!

  Jiminy Glick : Oh, I love that. That's the earmark of an "SNL" veteran. They are filled with irony and they're filled with facetiousness, and I think that's great. I think that's...

  Jon Lovitz : What are YOU filled with? Donuts?

  [audience cheers]