Red Dwarf (TV Series)

The Inquisitor (1992)

Jack Docherty: The Inquisitor

Photos 

Quotes 

• The Cat : Hi, buddy.

  Inquisitor : This is your judgment day, bud. I gotta be cruel. There can't be no favours.

  The Cat : I'm hearing you on FM.

  Inquisitor : I have to ask you the question. Justify your existence; what contribution have you made?

  The Cat : I have given pleasure to the world because I have such a beautiful ass.

  Inquisitor : Well, that's true.

  The Cat : Can I go now?

  Inquisitor : That's your case?

  The Cat : You need more?

  Inquisitor : Some might say that was a pretty shallow argument.

  The Cat : Some might say I'm a pretty shallow guy; a shallow guy with a great ass.

  Inquisitor : Sometimes you astonish even me.

  The Cat : Thank you.

• Inquisitor : Well, get out of this one, smeghead.

  Lister : What are you talking about?

  Inquisitor : You know what you could've made of your life if you tried; what you could have become.

  Lister : So?

  Inquisitor : You've got brains, man. Brains you've never used before.

  Lister : So?

  Inquisitor : So justify yourself.

  Lister : Spin on it.

• Lister : [Lister and Kryten are to be erased]  The Cat has lived a more worthwhile life than either of us?

  Inquisitor : He is a shallow and selfish creature, as is the hologram. By their own low standards they have acquitted themselves. Where as you and the mechanoid could've have been so much more.

• Inquisitor : Do you wish to be erased?

  Kryten : I'm programmed not to wish for anything, I serve.

  Inquisitor : In a human this behavior would be considered stubborn.

  Kryten : But I am not human, and neither are you, and it is not our place to judge them. I wonder why you do?

  Inquisitor : Enough.