"Saturday Night Live" Charlize Theron/Paul Simon (TV Episode 2000) - Tina Fey as Weekend Update Anchor

Tina Fey : Bush says that he kept the story of his arrest secret because he felt it did not set a good example for his daughters, preferring instead that they see him as a failed businessman who executes people.
Tina Fey : Following the premature release of a controversial "Esquire" interview, an angry Bill Clinton told reporters, "I was promised faithfully that the interview would be released after the election and I believed it." Yeah, that's crazy, isn't it, Bill? How some people can look you right in the eye and lie to you like that? Bill? Ah, I talk a good game, but I'd still make out with him.
Tina Fey : This week Brad Pitt was voted the Sexiest Man Alive by "People" magazine but unfortunately, he may lose the title in the Sexiest Man Electoral College.
Tina Fey : During a ceremony at a Holocaust memorial in Jerusalem this week, German Chancellor Gerhard Schroeder accidentally extinguished the memorial's eternal flame. The embarrassed chancellor immediately apologized, telling Jewish leaders, "Mein bad."
Rachel Dratch : Jimmy Fallon, will you marry me?

Jimmy Fallon : Eh... I don't know what to say.

Tina Fey : Okay, Jimmy, what will your answer be? Lorne is waiting to officiate the wedding should you choose to say yes.

Jimmy Fallon : Wait, Lorne's a minister?

Tina Fey : Eh, he's a ship's captain.

Jimmy Fallon : I can't marry you... I just got Playstation 2, it's very time consuming.

Tina Fey: Weekend Update Anchor