Scrubs (TV Series)

My Lucky Day (2002)

John C. McGinley: Dr. Perry Cox

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Quotes 

• Dr. Cox : [in response to something J.D. just said]  Oh, my God! I care so little, I almost passed out!

• Dr. Cox : [JD recently identified a disease in a patient from watching a TV show and Dr. Cox wants to prove it was a fluke]  Here's your chance. Two identical patients. I say we divide 'em up, just like in "The Parent Trap". One goes with the sexy, freewheeling bachelor dad, hello. The other goes with the whiny, neurotic, sexually repressed mom, oh, just you all over. Oh, and I checked tonight's TV listings. There is no special on that disease, so you're gonna wanna stop at the Blockbuster.

  J.D. : Please, I know all there is to know about thrombotic thrombo cyto... cytop top top top... toppy... toppy.

  Nurse Roberts : Thrombotic thrombocytopenic purpura.

• [Dr. Cox and the pregnant Jordan are walking through towards a Nurses' Station] 

  Dr. Cox : Yes, hello? Could we please get my hormonal, extremely annoying ex-wife's amnio underway?

  Jordan : Wow, I can't wait to write that down in the baby journal.

  [Dr. Cox grunts] 

  Jordan : Could you be a bigger ass right now?

  Dr. Cox : Could you *have* a bigger ass right now?

• J.D. : Hey, Dr. Cox. I'm sorry, I was just so frustrated before. So, now I'm here, why don't you go ahead and tell me what I forgot?

  Dr. Cox : [grinning excitedly]  Can I? Really?

  J.D. : Sure! Hit me.

  Dr. Cox : How about, "Go to hell, Shakira."

  J.D. : What?

  Dr. Cox : What, now that you've decided you're ready to listen, how does it work, huh? You gonna pull a string on my back? Well, step right up and give it a tug. But, I'm warning you, I bet it keeps coming up "Go to hell, Shakira."

• Dr. Cox : It was luck.

  J.D. : What?

  Dr. Cox : The thing that you forgot? Turns out, whatever you know about medicine, ultimately, luck or fate or God or... who knows what is always gonna end up playing a much bigger role in the whole thing than you and I ever will. Hell, it was lucky you were watching that show the other night. And it was unlucky that your patient went the other way, even though you did absolutely everything right; and, for the record, you did. I was looking over your shoulder every step of the way.

  J.D. : Thanks.

  Dr. Cox : Wasn't a favor, Newbie. It was my job.

• J.D. : How the hell did my patient die? I mean, you started corticosteroids, I started corticosteroids; you did plasmapheresis, I did plasmapheresis; you yelled at Mark the orderly, I yelled at Mark the orderly. Hey, Mark.

  Mark the Orderly : [sarcastically]  "Hey, Mark!"

  J.D. : [to Dr. Cox]  See? He's pissed!

  Dr. Cox : That's because his name is Frank.