The Simpsons (TV Series)

Kamp Krusty (1992)

Harry Shearer: Principal Skinner, Radio Voice, Otto, Dr. Hibbert, Mr. Black, Kent Brockman, News Reporter #2

Quotes 

• Kent Brockman : [Kent Brockman is covering a summer camp mutiny]  Ladies and gentlemen, I've been to Vietnam, Afghanistan, and Iraq, and I can say without hyperbole that this is a million times worse than all of them put together.

  Campers : [Burning Krusty in effigy]  Burn, Krusty, burn! Burn, Krusty, burn!

  Kent Brockman : A group of school-aged Spartacuses has taken this camp by force. Three counselors are missing and presumed scared.

  Kent Brockman : What's that? I'm being told I can have an exclusive interview with the ringleader.

  Homer : [Camera shows the Camp Bart flag; Homer's thinking]  Don't be the boy. Don't be the boy.

  Homer : [Camera shows Bart as the ringleader]  D'oh!

  [Homer loses the hair that grew back and regains the weight he lost while the kids were away] 

• Bart : That's Not Krusty the Klown!

  Mr. Black : What do you think, I just slapped a clown suit on some wino?

  [laughs weakly] 

  Barney Gumble : Yeah Bart, I am so Crunchy the Clown!

  [belches] 

• [while the kids at Kamp Krusty are starved and tormented, the counsellors sit down to a sumptuous meal] 

  Jimbo Jones : Yo, Mr. Black! Another brandy.

  Mr. Black : Gentlemen, to evil.

• [as the campers begin rioting] 

  Mr. Black : I thought you said you broke their spirits!

  Jimbo Jones : [in rising fear]  We did!

  Mr. Black : [slapping Jimbo across the face]  You broke *nothing*!

  Bart : Let's get 'em!

  Mr. Black : To the hydrofoil!

• Principal Skinner : [on the last day of school]  Attention all students, this is Principal Skinner. I trust you all remembered to bring in your implements of destruction? Now let's trash this dump!

• Mr. Black : Thank you, Krusty, and welcome, children. I am Mr. Black, your head counselor. For the past fifteen years, I was President of Euro Krusty Land... until it blew up. I'll take any questions you might have.

  [half a dozen hands are raised] 

  Mr. Black : You, and then, uh... one more.

  Milhouse Van Houten : Can we call you Uncle Blackie?

  Mr. Black : No.

• Kent Brockman : 3 counceslors are missing and presumed scared.