South Park (TV Series)

Pinkeye (1997)

Isaac Hayes: Chef

Photos 

Quotes 

• Chef : Damn it, boy! Why are you dressed up like that?

  [Cartman is in a ghost costume, but it looks like a KKKlansman] 

  Cartman : [oblivious]  I'm trying to trick-or-treat, goddammit!

  Chef : Remind me to whoop your ass the next time I see you. Now get inside before the zombies get you!

• Stan Marsh : [fighting off a zombie]  Okay, Chef, dial the hotline number!... Chef?

  [Chef has become a zombie] 

  Kyle Broflovski : CHEF!

  Chef : [singing]  I'm gonna make love, even when I'm dead / My body might be cold, but it's always hot in my bed / Make love, don't be afraid / Just because my heart ain't beating, don't mean you won't get LAID!

  [lets out a whoop] 

  Stan Marsh : Let's get outta here!

• Kyle Broflovski , Eric Cartman , Stan Marsh : [at Chef's house]  Trick or...

  [Chef appears brandishing chainsaws, scaring the crap out of them] 

  Chef : Get off my property, you brain-eating zombie bastards!

  Kyle Broflovski , Eric Cartman , Stan Marsh : CHEF! IT'S US!

  Chef : Oh! Sorry, children, I thought you were one of them!

• Principal Victoria : Good morning there, children. I love the Elvis costume, Chef.

  Chef : Elvis? I'm Evil Knievel! Why the hell would I dress up like Elvis?

  Principal Victoria : Well, why the hell would you dress up like Eviel Knievel?

• Chef : Get the hell outta here Johnson, I don't want any goddamned pink eye!

• Chef : Doc, I've seen this kind of thing before. This ain't no pinkeye. It's the living dead. Dead people getting up and walking around. They have no heartbeat, breathing, or feeling. Observe.

  [Chef pulls a patient's arm off] 

  Eye Doctor : Uh... Chef, Mr. Torez doesn't have pinkeye. He's here for a routine exam.

• [Chef bursts in on the Mayor and Officer Barbrady] 

  Mayor : Why Chef, what a surprise.

  Officer Barbrady : You're probably wondering why we're standing here with a pile of money and no pants on.

  Chef : Actually, uh...

  Mayor : Well, I can assure you that it has absolutely nothing to do with the Japanese mafia.

  Officer Barbrady : Not a thingy-dingy.